Harry Potter and the She's like a Sister Problem
by Christina-Potter-09
Summary: Post-DH No-Ep. Harry Potter & Hermione Granger are supposed to be friends...best friends... something like siblings... up until their hearts finally see what the eyes have been refusing to for all these years... Each Other... PURE HHR R&R!
1. Pets No More

_OK everybody! it's 03.44 am and i have the taste of lemonade on my lips as i sip on a small bottle, i am listening to Let love lead the Way and i have this **AMAZING **feeling every time i push the New Story button! HERE is the new story for HHR as i promised :) in my profile you can see the trailer and the banner of the story and I can just hope that you will stick with me through the whole deal :)_

**PLEASE READ BEFORE CONTINUING:** This will be a story with independent chapters every time, for example, this is about March 23rd 2002, the next one won't follow the 24th, it will probably be a few days, weeks or months later on, ALL the chapters will be in a sequence so we can follow easily, up until we get to the end of this journey :) if you didn't get what i say, just alert the story and you will realize soon :)

The story will soon be **M **to be safe and it will have the kinds of: Romance, Hurt/Comfort, Family, Angst (sometimes), Humor, Friendship and a few more that i cannot think of now lol and yeah... you little dirty people... it will probably have SMUT later on lol :P

So with no more words... Welcome to another Journey

Enjoy...

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Chapter 1 – Pets No More _

_March 23__rd__ 2002_

The flat was dark as the young man apparated inside and stumbled on the darn table he never avoided after apparition. He cursed in a whisper as his toe took the collision with the table's foot and he Lumosed the place with a flick of his wand.

Harry Potter remained in silence for a moment, when he made sure he was alone in the flat and Ron hadn't returned yet, he lit up all the candles of the place with another wave of his wand and collapsed on the couch.

The flat smelled of burnt food, beer and some dirty laundry was around the place, Harry sighed and shook his head, Ron had been there recently and had made sure for Harry to clean up the mess. The raven haired man remained collapsed on the couch, making a mental note to clean the mess in the morning, if Hermione was to come by she'd hex them both and his ass had nothing to do with the current mess of the living room.

He could feel every muscle of his body aching as another day in the training had been over. _Finally_, he thought with a small grin as in less than a month he would be in the graduations and there were already rumors about the ministry proposing to him for a job. If he was happy for something more than being employed that was for the end of the torturous hours in the gym of the Academy.

His grin faded as he thought of his empty stomach but he didn't even had the power to go and have a shower, let alone search in the fridge for whatever food survived Ron's advance in it. Harry sighed, wishing the female of their trio could be there to keep them in order but Hermione had to be away for now on.

She had aced her last year at Hogwarts of course, her NEWTS had been all perfect and she was right accepted in the Healer training program. It was a surprise to some people, she could be an excellent Auror or an Unspeakable but for people like Harry who knew her so well, being a Healer was something not so surprising. Hermione Granger was great at taking care of others and she found the perfect way to keep up with it without being in a battlefield for the rest of her life, like Harry had chosen to be as he followed his dream to become an Auror. Now Hermione lived and worked at Hogwarts where her internship had appointed her to be an intern next to the very much experienced and old Madame Pomfrey.

Harry was happy for Hermione, and very proud as his best friend loved her decision to be a healer and was just so happy to have her years of internship at Hogwarts, the place they both love so much, fact was, however, that Harry missed her greatly. After the war that he had been through by her side, the trio and Ginny had decided to have their year at Hogwarts as the Trio needed their NEWTS and Ginny had to finish her education too, at first as struggling young adults and then as couples, they tried as hard as they could.

Harry and Ginny had tried to make it, keep up from where they were left off while Hermione and Ron had tried to start all over again, war and madmen in their wake aside. The attempt lasted a torturous year of studies, fights between the couples, tears for the girls and smashing objects from the two young men until right before the graduation, Harry and Ginny had a quiet break up at the line of the Forbidden Forest while Hermione and Ron had a loud and eventful break up at the astronomy tower, giving everyone in the grounds a nice show of how two people can break up loudly.

Harry cared about Ginny, she was his first serious relationship if you can call that their few week long, snogging-based relationship in his sixth year and their few months after the war, comparing to Cho's tearful, jealous thing, Ginny meant more things to Harry, but when they tried again, he felt like all these nights watching at her dot in the Marauder's map was in vain. They were not the same people anymore, he wasn't the same person anymore, he had other expectations, other needs than what she could give and it wasn't her fault, he was just in another level by then and she still needed miles to get where he was. And she on her side, she needed other things, needed carefree days and parties, like most people needed after the war when Harry needed quiet nights before the fireplace to heal his wounds from the war, the fact that he actually killed, to proceed information like this of Snape being so different than what he thought and to realize that there was no more danger and he could actually plan longer than the next day of his life…

Not being able to open up to her about how he was feeling for most of the things around him was another problem, he wasn't that kind of person and Ginny wasn't the person to get the hints, she needed straight words, clarifications and talking when Harry needed someone to understand his needs of being alone or in the company of someone just by looking at their eyes… They had both lost the connection they had tried to build and the passion was extinguished now that there was no danger to hide from in this way. Ginny had been his distraction from evil, Harry had realized, when he was the young teen boy in Hogwarts and later on the hunted young man in that cold tent, he had put in her image all the things he wanted to return to: safety, Hogwarts, life, and when he achieved to return, the image broke as she was demystified in his eyes and nothing was left.

Nothing was built as the base of their relationship, no deep love, no real deep conversation in the search of who they were and why they wanted to be together, the passion had been there for a little more but then it was gone too, as the daily life showed them just that, Ginny wanted to be with Harry because of the myth she had made in her head about him and his achievement, a myth that was far away from reality and Harry had wanted to be with Ginny because she was his distraction from the most dark period in his life, when he needed someone out of his misery to be held as a reason to move through every day in that bloody tent back then.

Ron and Hermione were a totally different matter, the two best friends proved that sometimes, the "opposite that attract" can be "pole opposites" and they were the definition of this difference.

They tried hard, Ron on his part trying to be more understanding, less critical and ironic, less insensitive, less oblivious, and Hermione on her part tried to be less demanding, less bossy, less strict, less expecting, more understanding, more hopeful and positive… up until they both cracked after a dinner, spilled all their suppressed feelings at that Christmas Eve night and then brushed it off again, trying once more to beat their differences without talking them through.

Harry had been so uncomfortable when the two were together, when they were fine, he had a sickening feeling every time they kissed or hugged and when they were fighting and the time after their fights, when that awkwardness hang over their heads, he had felt as uncomfortable as he had to take someone's side. He had tried to be nuclear but Hermione had Ginny, another girl and Ron's sister, to back her up so Harry had tried instead of being the guy to help the other guy and have Hermione glaring at him too, he tried to be with the one's who was right side, and that usually led both to be glaring at him as there was no right and no wrong in all that situation, they were just different and too stubborn to accept it and stop the whole thing.

Hermione needed someone to get what she wanted and needed just by looking in her eyes or taking care in the details like her delicate blush or the biting of her bottom lip when Ron needed straight talking and no hints and signs, like his sister, he wanted straight things when Hermione wasn't the type to give all her needs on the plate, she needed the other to try, to search for what she needed like she always did with the people she cared about.

Ron's jealousy and insecurities hadn't helped things a lot, especially with the healing they both had needed to do after the war, his jealousy over everything that had to do with Hermione and her small patience with him and the scenes he was setting up almost every night at the common room were enough to be sending them both in their dorms furious and glaring.

Harry could remember one of their biggest fights, even before they could go back at Hogwarts, when Hermione was about to go and bring back her parents from Australia, Ron couldn't afford the journey and Harry would follow his best female friend as to help her and be there for her, even then, Ron had screamed at her face that she was choosing Harry over himself and Hermione had screamed back at him that he needed to mature before it was too late. Harry had been shocked at his mate's accusations once again, proving that he had never got past his fears of Harry and Hermione getting together, something that back then simply seemed silly and impossible …

Now things were different, Ron and Hermione had decided to salvage their friendship after that disastrous year as a couple and Ron had decided to everyone's surprise to keep up with Quidditch, the past three years he was playing as the Keeper of the Cannons, making his dream come true and filling his family's vault with galleons, while he had returned to Lavender Brown who was just too in love and happy to be with him once again.

Harry was happy for his best male friend too, with Lavender he was carefree and the old good Ron, none demanded things from him and he evolved in that relationship slower but with no precipitation and pressure, even if Lavender was exhausting most of the times, Harry was happy Ron had found a way to be happy with a girl who happened to be his greatest fan too, boosting his ego continuously…

At the thought of Ron and Lavender, Harry wondered where they were, Ron was having days off from the Cannon's camp and Lavender had made sure to take days off from her job as the editor of Witch Weekly magazine, since they weren't at the flat they had probably hit some club downtown. Harry was happy for them to be out, they could be loud and he was exhausted to cast powerful silencing charms to save his ears from bleeding.

Harry's eyes heaved as all the memories and thoughts about the four people's past was now slowly evaporating and sleep was taking over his tired body and mind. His eyes had almost drifted close the moment the silver creature past through the living room's window and circled the couch Harry was on, making the young man shot up in anxiety as Hermione's Patronus Otter was there to ask for help.

The young man didn't think about it twice, instead of sending a Patronus back at her, he moved close to the floo. If she hadn't flooed at their house and she sent her patronus something was really bad and he was going to find out immediately.

The moment he flooed at Hogwarts and moved out of the right fireplace, at her quarters the youngest and brightest intern in history of Hogwarts fled in his arms as her tears ran down her face. Harry thought exhausted, hugged her tightly as her long, less bushy but always rich hair blocked his view as she sniffed in his neck.

'Oh Harry thank Merlin you were at the flat…' Hermione cried against him and Harry caressed her back as she clang to his sobbing best friend.

'Hermione, what happened? What's wrong?' Harry asked alerted as the brunette witch finally moved slightly away but remained in his arms, her eyes were bloodshot and her nose was pink because of the crying.

'Crookshanks… he – he…' Hermione tried to say but another wave of fresh tears and sobs erupted and Harry frowned and hugged her again. He knew her half-Kneazle half-cat had been sick for the past days, not eating and not drinking milk or water and even if Hermione had tried her best to help him with potions and spells, the creature was just too old by now and his days were counted, that night was his last. Harry sighed and kissed his best friend's head, trying to sooth her, he knew how she felt, he had lost Hedwig four years ago and still hurt, he hadn't bought a new pet yet and even if Ginny had offered him an owl, three years ago he had refused to take it and the Weasleys had kept the bird as Harry didn't want any other pet than his snow white owl.

'I found him a few minutes ago… after I returned from dinner and my patrol, he wasn't moving and he – was –asleep- on my pillow,' Hermione said through sobs and sniffs and burst in new tears again. 'I didn't know who else to call- I can't- take care- of him on my own,' Hermione whispered and Harry sighed and made a hushing sound, he was there to help.

'It's ok 'Mione, he spent a great life by your side, he loved you and you loved him and he knew that, he was such a smart creature,' Harry tried but Hermione cried harder. Harry remembered Sirius' words about Crookshanks.

_"This cat isn't mad. He's the most intelligent of his kind I've ever met."_

'He liked you too,' Hermione whispered and Harry smiled sadly, that was true, the pet always enjoyed Harry's lap for a nap and preferred him over anyone else after Hermione, Harry could even remember himself shivering and feeling uncomfortable the times Hermione was absent and Crookshanks had pinned him with his eyes just like she would look at him when he was doing some mischief behind Hermione's back. 'I'm glad it wasn't Ron at the flat, I wouldn't stand a smartass comment like "finally the shoebruss is gone" or something,' Hermione added and Harry sighed.

'He liked Crookshanks at the end, he even placed Pig close to him for a sniff,' Harry tried to defend Ron but Hermione snorted. 'Where do you have him?' Harry added and Hermione let loose another sob.

'Where he fell-asleep, on my pillow,' Hermione whispered and Harry nodded as the two were still standing in the small common room.

'You want to stay here while I'll go in?' Harry offered and Hermione nodded her head as he squeezed her tighter a moment before he could leave her arms.

'And Harry… take the pillow too, I won't sleep on it ever again anyway,' Hermione called out as Harry was ready to get inside her bedroom. 'We can take him to some clearing maybe?' Hermione offered and Harry nodded and got inside the smaller bedroom.

Even if the walls were made from brick and the place could seem cold, Hermione's bedroom at Hogwarts was as cozy and warm as her bedroom at their flat, half of her books were in bookshelves there, covering two of the four walls while photos and diplomas of her NEWTS covered the other two walls of the chamber. There was a desk before one of the walls with the moving and Muggle pictures and there was a bed across the room, there, on the pillow, the large deceased pet was laying eternally asleep.

Harry sighed as he felt his own tears building up at the image of the large cat dead at his mistress' pillow where he knew he had smelled her hair the most. Harry sighed as he moved closer and touched the fur of the cat as it was curled in a ball. At least he had spent a good life next to Hermione for his final years when none wanted to buy him from the store and Hermione had taken more than great care of him ever since she was thirteen years old.

'Come on, buddy,' Harry whispered as he picked up the pillow carefully, wandlessly, Harry conjured a sheet and put the pillow on it, he covered it and the cat and then he conjured a wooden box, similar to the ones he had learnt to make in his training for storage of precious objects. He put inside the bundle and closed the box. He took it in his arms and moved out of the bedroom where Hermione was crying silently while staring out of the castle's window.

When she looked back at him and the box, her brown eyes filled with tears again and Harry could only nod as the two moved out of her small common room and into Hogwarts' deserted corridors. Hermione illuminated her wand and the two moved in silence until they moved out of the castle and into the grounds that were chilly with the April wind being cool yet not cold.

The two friends moved inside the Forbidden Forest and untypically decided to head for the only clearing they knew that existed. Grawp's old area seemed good for Crookshank's last resting place and the two moved towards there, soon passing by the tree the two had hidden behind from, years ago when Grawp had tried to grip Hermione and Harry had helped her from falling on the ground in her panic to save herself.

The two moved through the clearing and after making sure none and nothing was following them in the middle of the night, Harry set down the box carefully and took his wand out of his pocket once again, he pointed at the space before a large oak and soon a deep enough hole was opened. Harry looked at the tearful Hermione and she nodded her head as they bowed their bodies, took the box together and placed it carefully inside the forest floor.

Hermione covered her lips with her hand as Harry covered the small grave magically and then she hugged him tightly once again, having Harry hugging her back as his tears finally escaped his own eyes. If he had made an eulogy for Aragog back in his sixth year, he was sure Crookshanks deserved one too.

'Crookshanks, you were a great creature, half-cat, half kneazle, like your mistress is a witch from Muggle parents, you both know how is to be different and smarter than everyone else,' Harry started and Hermione gave a small chuckle as her lips were against the side of his neck. Harry smiled slightly as he achieved to make her smile even through all this. 'You were also loyal and bossy, I never expected a cat to be bossy but you were special, like your mistress and you knew when something was wrong, you even tried to show it, again, like your mistress, and at the end you usually end up right even if the rest didn't pay attention.' Harry went on and now Hermione moved her face as to look at him while he spoke.

'I am sure you're going to have fun where you're now, you can find Hedwig and together can watch me and Hermione here…' Harry went on and his voice cracked just a bit at the mention of his own pet that he didn't have the time to burry properly as he had escaped a lethal attack back then. Now it was probably the time to say a word about his owl too with Hermione by his side, squeezing his waist in support.

'You always wanted to take care of Hermione and you helped my Godfather a lot, and for that I am grateful, without you, he wouldn't have made it to get in Hogwarts and I would probably had never met him like I did.' Harry went on as more memories rushed in his mind, making him sigh, sniff and let the tears to fall, he was never embarrassed to cry before Hermione, they knew each other so well that he felt comfortable to express himself in the middle of the Forbidden Forest with centaurs and other creatures around but her in his arms as well.

'I can promise you I will take care of her like you did and I am sure you had a great time with her, oh and thank you for preferring me over Ron, that always annoyed him beyond imagination…' Harry added and this time Hermione chuckled and smiled sadly at Harry before she could hug him again and place a soft kiss on his cheek.

'Thank you,' Hermione whispered and Harry sighed and hugged her back, even after four years, sometimes there were moments like this that they healed yet another small wound in their souls, doing so by each other's company was all the more better.

'You want to tell him something too?' Harry asked softly but Hermione shook her head negatively.

'You said it all,' she whispered and Harry nodded and started moving away, all the while taking her from the shoulders while she wrapped her arm around his waist, a way of walking they had got accustomed to ever since that Christmas night at Godric's Hollow.

'You'd like to stay here tonight? You can sleep on the couch if we enlarge it slightly,' Hermione offered as the two moved out of the forbidden forest and Harry smiled and nodded his head, sleeping over at Hogwarts, his second home was another bonus of Hermione being an intern there.

'I would love to see everyone's faces tomorrow morning when I'll be down for breakfast,' Harry said teasingly and Hermione grinned.

'And the rumors will spread again about us being in love secretly and "hiding our love within the Hogwarts walls"' Hermione mimicked Rita Skitter's high-pitched voice, causing Harry to laugh and herself to follow suit. 'The Headmistress might allow the Gryffindor team to have a fly with you before lunch, they have practice at twelve preparing the match with Ravenclaw this Saturday.' Hermione added and Harry grinned.

'Even if McGonagall doesn't want me to, I'm sure the guys won't let me be until we have the practice together so… it'll be fun, my fire bold is still in your closet right?' Harry asked and Hermione grinned and nodded her head.

'Safely kept there after I have declined all of your fangirls to touch, snapshot, caress and even lick it…' Hermione said and Harry blushed and then burst in laugher 'I've missed watching Quidditch matches, I never missed any of yours but now as an intern I usually watch them from the healing room of the pitch, waiting for the bludgers to bring in patients,' Hermione said and Harry laughed again as the two got inside the castle and sobered as they didn't want the ghosts and the rest to get startled by their noises.

'You think we could sneak in the kitchens and take some food? I didn't have time to eat anything ever since the lunch break at the training,' Harry whispered as they moved through the entrance Hall, still in the hug and Hermione moved towards the kitchens' direction without a second word spoken.

'You should be taking better care of yourself while I'm away Harry…' Hermione said in a serious voice and Harry grinned. Ever since Hermione had learnt to decently cook, she had became overprotective of their food habits, she might had given up the diet she had for Ron to follow but she was still in great care of Harry's eating.

'It's not my fault you took the internship here and you're letting me and Ron starve back in London.' Harry said and Hermione this time snorted and chuckled.

'Oh please… Ron can eat _anything_ out of the fridge, the butter from the box _included_, and you can cook just fine as far as I remember,' Hermione said but Harry didn't have the time to say something more as she tickled the pear on the painting and the entrance to the kitchen was revealed, where many elves rushed close to the two and after being kindly asked for some leftovers or even some plain milk and biscuits, they brought a lot of food for the two to enjoy.

Hermione took only one slice of cake and a cup of milk as to calm down her stomach that had been uneasy like the rest of her from the sobs and the crying while Harry helped himself with some leftovers of pot roast, potatoes and salad, always accompanied by a large glass of pumpkin juice. The two friends held a small chat and after Harry was done with his late dinner, the two thanked wholeheartedly the elves that stuffed their pockets with candies and said their goodnights.

When the two returned in Hermione's quarters, she brought sheets, blankets and conjured new pillows for both of them, she set the couch for Harry with his help after he had enlarged it and Harry was the one to lay down on it with a groan before Hermione could sit down, close to his sides, they both fell in comfortable silence as they watched the extinguishing fire in the fireplace from which Harry had flooed in before.

'Harry, again… thank you for tonight, I wouldn't have made it on my own.' Hermione said and Harry smiled softly at her as she took his hand and squeezed it. The two had grown to be more comfortable in each other's company than with anyone else ever since their break ups with the Weasleys and Ron's consumed time by Quidditch and Lav-Lav.

'You know I wouldn't let you alone in this, you were there for me with Hedwig and Dobby… this was the least I could do, I'm really sorry he passed,' Harry said in a soft voice and Hermione smiled even if new tears built in her eyes. She nodded her head and took them away with her jumper's sleeve.

'It's OK, you're right, he had a good life while in my care and he was an amazing pet, I wouldn't ask for any other and I will certainly need time before I can have a new one, he was just so good,' Hermione whispered and Harry nodded and with his free hand he caressed her back soothingly. Without thinking too much of it, he tagged at her hand and Hermione leaned in and laid down before him, they found themselves spooned against each other as the exhaustion finally took over both of them.

'I should go to my bedroom,' Hermione whispered sleepily as her eyes heaved and Harry nodded but kept the hold on her hand as his arm pillowed her head and the hand that had been caressing her back was now around her waist.

'Mhm,' Harry agreed as sleepily as his eyes drifted closed, now he felt so much better and at ease than before in the messy, empty apartment while he starved.

Now he was comfortable, warm, seated and full and Hermione's body before him was only very promising of a sleep free of nightmares and startled wake ups in the middle of the night, and with that thought, a smile formed on his lips as sleep took over both of them...

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OOOK i know... i killed Crookshanks... you hate me, i hate me too but a few days back one of my cats got sick and i for some reason, in my fear and panic and tears, got inspired to make this chapter, i promise the next ones will be happier (hopefully : P)

sooo what u think? we had a lot of description but i needed to set up the whole thing of how things are, did i show correctly why i don't like harry-ginny and hermione-ron? and what u think of harry rushing to help hermione and giving an eulogy for the kneazle? was it good? was it nice to see the two feeling so comfortable with each other? oh yeah and they got spooned at the end :P and we're just at the beginning :P AND YES, HARRY POTTER FANGIRLS ASK HERMIONE IF THEY'RE ALLOWED TO LICK HIS BROOMSTICK (take your minds out of the gutter! i meant his firebold...) ;P

**PLEASE REVIEW I NEED A POSITIVE START TO KEEP UP!**

the deal is the same, many reviews=quick updates!


	2. Sleeping Together

_I know you're probably already scrolling down but three things first:_

**1. HUGE THANKS FOR THE AWESOME SUPPORT!**

_2. THE DEAL OF MANY REVIEWS=QUICK UPDATES STILL WORKS FOR MY MUSE (you have an update in 3 days!) : D_

3. I GOT IT, IT'S FIREBOLT NOT FIREBOLD HAHAHA (darned Office Word and its correcting system!)

Enjoy...

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Chapter 2 – Sleeping Together_

_April 29__th__ 2002_

Harry sighed as he flood to Hermione's private common room. He was finally done with his training and that was a reason to smile since in a few days time, he was starting in the Department of Security as one of the most promising new Aurors in the history of the British Ministry. However, tonight's plans had Harry Potter sighing again as he paced up and down before Hermione's fireplace while her bedroom door was still shut.

'I'll be right out!' Hermione's voice was heard as she had probably heard the floo being activated. Harry smiled and nodded at himself as his best friend was still getting ready, she was a young lady after all…

He never heard good things about reunions, some people said they end up in tears, others said they end up in punches over not-finished romances and others said they end up in tragedy, thing was, Harry wasn't very excited about the evening Lavender Brown had planned out for everyone from the class of 1991 to attend at the Three Broomsticks. Harry would have preferred a small gathering maybe at someone's house so they could also celebrate Harry's end of training but now, the _Prophet_ reporters and the rest of the media were already out of the pump waiting for the "celebrities" to arrive as one Hero, a Heroine, their best friend Super star of Quidditch and Hero too along with a bunch of hero friends were going to be there… Harry huffed at the idea.

Hermione had almost made it to back herself out of all this but Harry wouldn't go on his own that evening for nothing in the world. Ron was with Lavender, Neville would be there with Hannah and their baby, little Frank. Dean with Ginny, Seamus with his new boyfriend, Edward and Parvati would probably try AGAIN to throw herself at Harry's feet as for some reason, a few months back, she had remembered their first and last time in a date, at that darned Yule Ball… ever since the young Gryffindor had been squealing every time she saw Harry, the raven haired wizard was almost certain Lavender was behind that as she'd love the idea of her best friend being hooked with Ron's best friend and hero of the world...

Hermione had tried to keep herself out of all this with the excuse of having to prepare tests for the N.E.W.T.s and the O.W.L.s of the students but Harry wouldn't have it, he didn't want to go alone in a reunion, he kind of felt uncomfortable to be there on his own with almost all the rest hooked up and the first thought he had when Ron told him about what Lavender had set up, was to ask Hermione if she wanted for them to go together. Hermione had tried to decline gently, they were friends and they would just show up, it wasn't a "date" most likely… a way to escort each other, when Harry had told her that she wouldn't have a lot of opportunities to go out with the "awesome Harry Savor Potter", the brunette had laughed and finally agreed after Harry actually begged not to be left alone with snogging couples and Parvati Patil close to him.

Hermione finally opened the door and emerged as Harry stopped in his black robes and looked at his best friend, his jaw was left opened… She was rather simply dressed, a beautiful long, deep blue dress to keep her legs warm from the crisp April air, a V neck was showing her cleavage and a beautiful scarf of as it seemed silk, was keeping her throat secure too, above that a grey-silver dress robe was finishing her clothing, her face had simple make-up, just a touch of rouse, a hint of eyeliner and a little lip-gloss.

'Too much?' she asked as she stood before him and looked at his agape mouth. Harry finally closed his mouth, blinked at the amazement he always felt when his bookie friend changed clothes and transformed herself into a fairy, like in fourth year he could still remember, just by leaving the skirts for a dress and he finally smiled as he looked at her worried eyes.

'You look beautiful,' Harry finally said and Hermione's cheeks turned even pinker than the shade of the rouse's. 'And no, it's not too much; actually we'll all be invisible before whatever Lavender has chosen to wear…' Harry added and Hermione laughed and moved closer to him as to help him with his tie that for some reason was a bit tugged at the left, as if ready to fly.

'Thanks,' she said as she was still blushed while her hands worked on his tie, the two friends smiled at each other as they were in close distance. Harry moved his chin up to give her space and Hermione made sure his tie was nicely set now, her fingers leaving a trail of a ticklish sensation on his neck's skin. When she finished the tie, she smiled at him, patted the fabric on the shoulders as if to dust it off and then smiled at Harry who moved his chin back to normal height once again with a smile on his face.

'Thanks,' he replied her own thanks with one of his own as the two smiled warmly at each other, they always took care of each other and just like that, Harry moved some locks behind Hermione's face as they had fallen before her eyes. She smiled and comfortably moved away from him as to take her purse. Harry waited for her as she took her purse, lowered the magical candles' fire around the room and took his hand as they both moved out of her common room.

'Hello Healer Granger! Mr. Potter!' Many young students greeted the two as Harry and Hermione moved through the corridors as to go to Hogsmeade. The two friends smiled and greeted the students, especially Hermione who knew most of them. Harry and Hermione said their hellos to Hagrid when they moved out of the castle, the half-giant smiled and waved at them as he was taking care of a baby unicorn that was bright gold and amazing…

'He finally decided to stop teaching about crazy creatures…' Hermione said with a smile as the two moved out of the gates with the winged bears. Harry grinned as he remembered all the crazy hours of the Care of Magical Creatures he had with Hagrid.

'Do you know what rooms have Lav booked?' Harry asked and Hermione shook her head, the people that would be in the reunion would also sleep over at the Three Broomsticks as it was a Friday and they didn't know how long the night's event would last.

'I was actually thinking of returning at Hogwarts for the night… I mean why should I sleep at the Three Broomsticks when my second home is minutes afar?' Hermione said but Harry shook his head and tightened his hand around her own as they kept moving.

'No, you won't leave me when the couples will be in their rooms and Parvati will be free, you won't be the instigator of my rape!' Harry exclaimed and Hermione chuckled and then started laughing at his words.

'I'm sure she'll behave.' Hermione tried but Harry shook his head.

'No, if you leave, I leave and sleep at the couch in your common room, I have done that before and your common room is protected by spells that will keep Parvati out…' Harry said and Hermione laughed harder as the two friends kept walking, Harry started laughing too as they approached the village, the night was falling slowly and more and more lights would be shown minute by the minute that passed.

'OK, fine…I'll stay there; you want me to watch your door too in the night while you'll have your beauty sleep?' Hermione asked between chuckles and smiles.

'Knowing you and your perfect spells are close by is enough…' Harry said and Hermione nodded as they finally reached the first houses of the village.

'Some auror you'll be…' Hermione commented teasingly and Harry nudged her with his elbow and she replied with her side before they could both laugh harder.

The two moved in the main path of the village until they reached the outside of the pub, where about two dozens of reporters and journalists were taking pictures. Harry and Hermione declined to comment on anything and got inside the pub by pushing their way through the asking questions journalists who tried to block their way. When the two finally got inside the full of people place, Ron was the first person they both saw as their friend stood up and waved for them in a table in the other end of the room, where everyone had already arrived and was seated around it.

Harry and Hermione moved close and greeted everyone, first Ron, then Lavender, then Ginny and Dean and then the rest of the people that were around the table. Harry tried to avoid the very smiling Parvati but didn't succeed as the young woman gripped him by the shoulders and gave him a big hug, Ron was smirking above her shoulder and Hermione had a face of disgust on her face as the over excited best friend of Lavender released him after a few moments. Harry made sure to squeeze himself between Hermione and Ron to make sure this encounter wouldn't take place again.

'So how are you Harry?' Parvati asked lovingly by Hermione's other side, Hermione, like the rest turned their attention on Harry, Lavender was beaming at her best friend's try to get Harry's attention while Harry's best male friend was smirking once again and his best female friend was the only one on the table frowning, like himself Harry was sure.

'Uhm… good, I guess, I'm done with my training and soon start my job at the ministry,' Harry said and Lavender and Parvati squealed, making most of the people on the table to jump on their skin and look at them weirdly.

'We should drink at that,' Parvati said loudly and waved at Madame Rosmerta so Harry and Hermione could order their drinks as the rest were already settled.

'And at your mouth being stuffed with liquid,' Hermione murmured with her head turned at Harry's direction as the lady of the pump moved between them to take the order, Harry nodded his head a bit at her words and the two ordered butterbeers.

The people around the table started talking, catching up, Parvati many times tried to catch Harry's interest but Harry made sure to pull Hermione in deep conversations about things like the upcoming NEWTs at Hogwarts, the ministry's new levels of security in departments like the one of the Mysteries and in general, conversations that Parvati could not possibly participate.

'So… now that she's finally occupied with poor Ginny, do you have any actual news?' Hermione asked as the rest were talking with each other and Harry and Hermione were left alone. Harry smiled but shook his head.

'I haven't seen you for a week… nothing major changed, I'm just happy that I'll be sleeping more hours now, the training was crazy,' Harry said and Hermione smiled too and nodded her head.

'You've turned out to be a massive sleepyhead,' Hermione commented with a teasing smile that Harry replied with one of his own.

'Well I've lost a lot of sleep in the past, right?' Harry asked and Hermione's smile faded, she looked deep into his eyes, in that Hermione-ish way she had and then took his hand in hers.

'You deserve to be at peace,' Hermione said this time seriously and Harry smiled at her and squeezed her hand lightly.

'Just like you do, Hermione…we both do…' Harry said with the smile still on, Hermione gave a weak smile too. 'So, anything new about you?' he asked and this time she grinned.

'Well, I recently learnt that I have an admirer, actually,' Hermione said and Harry actually felt himself going rigid. Both he and Hermione hadn't been involved in any kind of serious relationship after the Weasleys and Harry always felt uncomfortable with the blokes Hermione occasionally met and sometimes dated for a few weeks tops. He felt his stomach tightening, like it did every time he learnt that Hermione's personal life had been updated, that old feeling that consumed him when he was seeing her with Ron was always coming back in these situations. He always believed it was because he didn't want to lose his best friend, he might not have felt it when Ron was with Lavender but… Hermione was different.

'Or is that so?' Harry finally managed to say and Hermione this time grinned, making Harry's stomach feel even heavier.

'He's twelve, a second year Hufflepuff, I found a heart-shaped letter on the infirmary's desk and to be honest at first I thought it was for Madame Pomfrey…' Hermione started and Harry felt himself exhaling without even realizing it. 'It was a late Valentine's letter as he explained inside, he had needed weeks to find the guts to send it and at the end of the letter he promised me he will be injuring himself weekly as to be seeing me… of course I informed Professor Sprout about his intentions so she can talk to him because he's already trying to get in the Quidditch team of his house… I don't want him releasing Bludgers towards himself just as to come to the infirmary…' Hermione added and Harry chuckled.

'He's more of a diehard fan than Parvati …' Harry said quietly and Hermione grinned but Paravati's ears or radar … had caught her name being spoken by Harry and she turned around, completely abandoning her talk with Ginny.

'Did you call my name, Harry?' Parvati asked sweetly and Harry saw Hermione frowning again before him while with the corner of his eyes, he caught the overdressed Lavender watching with a huge smile on her face…

It was long past midnight when Hermione excused herself to go to her room and Harry rushed to follow suit as Parvati had been waiting for him to finally be Hermione-free as Harry had made sure not to get away from her for a single moment. Ron and Lavender and Neville with Hannah and their son had already called it a night so Harry and Hermione followed suit, leaving a drunk Seamus laughing with the evenly drunk Edward, Dead and Ginny. Parvati said her goodnight too, evidently disappointed as she glared at Hermione before she could wave her black mane and go upstairs. Harry rolled his eyes as Hermione watched Parvati leaving like a lioness would do with a strange lioness that got inside her perimeter, and then the two friends left too.

'Goodnight, Hermione,' Harry said as he reached his door first, her room was across his, Hermione smiled and kissed his cheek once, like she had done before, a kiss back then that like this now, took him by surprise.

'Sweet dreams, Harry,' Hermione said and Harry knew she was still thinking about his past troubled sleep. He smiled touched and squeezed her hand as they opened their rooms' door, left their hands and slipped inside their rooms respectively.

Harry was still smiling as he approached the bed of the room and flopped on it with a groan of satisfaction. He was still with his clothes and shoes on as his eyes started to close.

BANG!

'OH YES!'

Harry's eyes opened widely at the familiar sound, he groaned again, this time in exasperation as the rhythmical banging started by the room on the left side of his. Ron and Lavender had that room of which the bed's headboard was now hitting the wall rhythmically. Harry felt actually sick at the sounds as soon Lavender's loud voice accompanied the whole deal.

The moment Ron's voice was sound croaking some profanity, Harry rushed to find his wand and cast a silencing charm on the left wall. Everything was silent after that and Harry sighed as if to stop the nausea that had been built up. He laid back on the bed again and tried to relax, Hermione's image flew in his mind as his eyes closed again and he smiled for a moment, she still cared for his sleep, his diet, his life, of course she would, she's his best friend, one of the closest people in his life, but sometimes the very fact of it made him smile, feel special.

'OUAAAAHHHH!'

Harry's eyes opened again, this time exhausted as they turned and looked at the right wall of the bloody room, as it was obvious, from the other side of it, little Frank Longbottom was screaming his lugs out. For being the son of two so low profile and quiet parents, this little boy knew how to scream his head off…

Instead of silencing that wall too, Harry decided to get up, the sleep that had started to cloud his head had been destroyed by the people from the surrounding rooms and now he was feeling like running a marathon. With no much consideration, he changed into comfortable clothes that he had shrunk inside his pocket and decided to move out of his room and go to the only person he knew couldn't be asleep yet.

He opened the door and looked around the corridor, making sure he won't get across Parvati that wouldn't surprise him by spying on his room, when he saw the coast was clear, he walked the three separating steps that kept him from Hermione's door. He was ready to knock on the door but he paused his hand an inch from the wood as apart the moans, the groans, the banging of metal with plaster and the crying child in the corridor, Harry could hear another sound, a song, he could barely hear that but he would swear it came from Hermione's room and his curiosity took the best of him as instead of knocking on the door, he touched the doorknob and gave it a slight tug, opening the door just a bit.

"_To light the night  
To help us grow  
To help us grow  
It is not said  
I always know_

_Please don't make a fuss  
It won't go away  
The wonder of it all  
The wonder that I made  
I am here to stay  
I am here to stay_

_...Stay"_

The last word sounded a bit strained, as if her voice had broken for a moment but Harry found himself staring at his best friend that obliviously was sat at the railing of the window, looking out of the window at the rain that had started over the village a couple of hours ago with her hair all over her shoulders as it fell in rich curls, her song died down after the last word and only a humming sound was heard as her lips remained sealed but produced the melody. He wasn't sure he knew the song, he loved it however. It was sweet and even if he had listened to it at the end of it and wished he could have heard it all, Harry smiled as he hadn't heard Hermione singing before.

He knew her voice so well, whispering, yelling, bossing him around, being broken because of her tears, he even had it in his own head as the voice of his conciseness, the voice that told him how to do the right thing.

'Harry!' her so familiar voice was now sounded again in a gasp as Hermione had turned around and had seen him, he hadn't realized that he had gotten inside the room fully in his try to listen to her song but he blushed as he got caught.

'Uhm… sorry, I should have knocked, it's just uhm that I couldn't sleep-and thought uhm, never mind, and I'm sorry again. Good night, Hermione.' Harry stammered, he wasn't sure why he felt so nervous, he had seen her in the middle of the night before, they lived for the past three years under same room in their flat, at Hogwarts as Head Boy and Girl in a private dormitory and before that in that tent where there were not even walls for heaven's sake, what got into him?

'Harry wait!' Hermione was heard and Harry paused as he stumbled to get out of the room as soon as possible, he paused and looked at her. 'It's ok, I can't sleep either..' Hermione said and Harry finally cleared his throat, nodded his head and closed the door behind him. Only then Hermione seemed to notice the noises from the corridor.

'I've put a slight silencing spell as to prevent noises from the rest of the pump but I didn't think of them,' Hermione said with a smile and Harry chuckled, still a bit uneasy as Hermione moved away from the railing and moved to the bed, supporting her back against the headboard and stretching her legs that got exposed by the nightgown, and for some reason made Harry gulp as he looked at them for a moment longer.

He finally decided to stop acting like an idiot and he moved close to the bed, in a gesture he had done before, he climbed on her bed and laid down next to her, his head on the pillow, Hermione smiled down at him as the two for a few moments watched the rain out of the window in silence.

'You have a very nice voice,' Harry stated after awhile and Hermione looked at him surprised before she could blush deeply. She chuckled and thanked him quietly. Harry knew Hermione was a charismatic person, externally, he always found her a beautiful girl, even before she could fix her teeth at fourth year and even at first year when her hair was really like a bush, he never saw something ugly on her, and as the years passed by, she got to blossom into a beautiful woman, and of course her brain was still developing, making her brighter and brighter, but he never imagined his best friend had a beautiful voice too. They never had the time to see each other's artistic sides, he practically could do nothing, sing, draw, paint, write or something similar, and as far as he knew, Ron believed as art the huge consumption of food in little time… so no, he hadn't seen his friend's artistic talents, now he realized that Hermione's children would be very lucky to have their mom singing lullabies with this voice. Had he actually just thought of Hermione's children?

'What are you thinking?' Hermione asked, pulling him out of his thoughts for a moment. He shrugged, not even considering answering truthfully...

'Random things…' Harry said and Hermione nodded her head as Lavender's voice was barely heard squealing repeatedly before she could call out "WON-WON you're my KING!' Harry shut his eyes in disgust as he heard Hermione chuckling. He opened his green eyes again and looked at her amused face.

'My ears are bleeding… I don't know what's worse, the baby or Lav?' Harry commented and Hermione grinned as she laid down next to him too, her own head on the pillow next to his.

'Lav, the baby will eventually get tired…' Hermione answered and Harry sighed.

'Doesn't it bother you?' he asked carefully and Hermione looked at him with a small smile on her lips.

'Ron having sex with another girl? As much as it would bother Ginny listening to her brother…' Hermione said and Harry nodded. 'Both Ron and I are so over that period, Harry. We're grown and know we're better off as friends than anything else… you know that too probably as well as we do, it was pointless.' Hermione said and Harry nodded again.

'It wasn't your fault.' Harry tried to reassure her as he wasn't sure what to say, he always felt odd at the subject and he wasn't even sure why he asked this time at the first place, his curiosity probably getting the better of him.

'And neither was Ron's. We're just different, I need a man by my side as I feel much more matured for my age, and he needed a carefree girl since he actually needs someone his age and maturity levels…' Hermione said and Harry grinned.

'If he is searching for maturity levels as his, he should check out the friends of that twelve year old admirer of yours…' Harry said with a teasing smile and Hermione chuckled and then laughed.

'No… seriously, I'm happy for him, Lavender is in love with him, not even noticing things in his character that I couldn't and still can't even stand, and he's more relaxed, he's not constantly trying to satisfy her, they're easier…' Hermione said and Harry nodded this time in agreement.

'You just need someone "equal" to you,' Harry said and Hermione looked at him with eyes full of emotion.

'You just say it and I know it sounds bad but that's the truth.' Hermione said and Harry took her hand in his.

'It's not bad, we're not talking about equality as human beings, of course we're all equal, I mean equal in other levels, emotional, mental, of maturity… this kind of equality,' Harry said and Hermione nodded her head as someone was saying the things that she believed exactly. 'And I'm sure you'll find that one guy one day, Hermione, you're great, bright, beautiful and with a nice voice… you're the perfect catch…' Harry added and this time his words even truthful were covered with a veil of teasing. Hermione blushed once again and poked his ribs with her hand, making him yelp and laugh.

'And I'm sure you'll find a good girl one day, Harry, one to understand you, to shout at your face when you're wrong, the one to make you smile by doing simple things.' Hermione said when their laughter subsided. The two friends looked at each other's eyes that were still full of mirth for an endless moment up until Hermione's face broke into a yawn that made Harry smile as the noises from the corridor finally seemed to be done. Harry was feeling so comfortable where he was and as he saw Hermione's eyes closing as she was still smiling at him, he felt his own eyes heaving and he yawned too with his hand still holding hers.

* * *

Awwwww awwww and awwww the song is "Little House" by Amanda Sayfried and it's simply amazing

sooo what u think guys? aren't these two little idiots in love but not aware or is it just me? : P

I was thinking how annoying Lav is and then i wondered how much worse she can get, and then i thought of her best friend :P

What u think of it guys? what about harry and hermione going together and harry losing it for a moment for Hermione's admirer, what about hermione frowning all the time and of course what u think of the final part with Harry listening to the all so familiar voice of hermione's singing...?

and yep Seamus is gay, i always wanted some of them to be gay, gay guys are so funny and good natured people : )

please review! and my muse will give back all the love you give with another quick update that i'll make :D

CP09


	3. Drunk & Truthful

OOOK guys! i'm speechless with all the love and the support you show for this story, i feel like a champion lol THANK YOU SO MUCH! BUT SEE? I'M GOOD WITH THE DEAL IN MY PART, UPDATING SO SOON your love makes me wanna update the soonest possible every time so thanks for that

thank you so much for the love, i don't know what else to say, oh i do! if you want me as a friend in Facebook and Twitter, you can find my names for both sites in my profile page... that's it, lets scroll down now...

Enjoy...

* * *

Chapter Three – Drunk and Truthful

2nd of May 2002

Harry Potter was sat on the edge of his bed, his eyes were stuck on a small corner of his bedroom, between the bookcase Hermione had bought for him when they were decorating his apartment and the legs of the small study he needed to have as to put his Auror training books on and have his homework in the past. His eyes were stuck, staring at nothingness but his mind was racing while he remained on his own in the bedroom.

This bloody day, the second of May, the day he murdered, the day he conquered as not to be defeated, the day so many people died, the day almost he and his friends died.

He always wondered why he had to live when other people died, Hermione had commanded him again and again not to go feel guilty because all these people had fought because they wanted to, however, Harry always felt a pang of pain and guilt through his heart every time he saw people like his Godson, Teddy, always knowing that his parents died for a war in Harry's name.

If things weren't as bad as they were with the memories and wounds always being more painful in such days, when details and flashes of memories thought forgotten always returned, the ministry had made sure to have the Anniversary of this day and a big Ball at the Ministry as to "celebrate" and remember.

Harry hated political games, he was a man of action, of temper, he wanted things to be clear and done, he hated to see all these ministry people lecturing about bravery and memory when they were nowhere to be seen during those months and days, during that fight where Order members and students fought against Tom Riddle and his Death Eaters. He hated to know he was also being used for the past years in this system of hypocrites and lairs but he had no other option as he had chosen to work for the Aurors and the ministry itself.

Now, sat there, in his bedroom, hearing Lavender gushing over Ron's appearance and some smacking kisses somewhere in the rest of the flat, Harry felt like suffocating, he felt like all this was in vain again, like all this was just a holiday for the rest of the world, for people who cared about the Ball when there were still families affected by the war. All this until another Dark Lord could rise and another Harry Potter could kill him as to have another holiday and another ball in some other day of the calendar, always hoping that it'll be either a Friday or a Monday as to make a three-days break instead of the simple weekend…

A soft knock was heard on the door and Harry sighed and answered it, Hermione's curly hair showed up first and then the rest of her face, giving a small smile, Harry could see in her eyes it was forced, it was a smile to replace a frown as she had seen him on his own and in silence. The rest of her was revealed and Harry looked at her black dress and silver-grey dress robes, the same she had worn almost two weeks ago, classic Hermione, she would never go and buy clothes for such a ball in such a day… she was from the people affected and not the people checking the calendar… yet, she looked beautiful.

'Hey…' Harry decided to speak first and Hermione sighed and moved inside the room slowly, reached for the bed and sat next to him, she took his hand and squeezed and Harry sighed.

'Hey you…' she whispered and the two remained there for a bit, sat on the bed looking inside each other's orbs, communicating like they always did. 'You have to see Lavender's dress, she's like…' Hermione decided to speak and Harry actually sighed and smiled truly, she knew how to do it. Right that moment Lavender showed up and looked at the two on the bed, her dress was a bright pink with purple feathers at the end of it around the knees and a huge V neck, showing to everyone the enlarging charm a certain part of her anatomy had endured.

' Like a chandelier with feathers,' Harry muttered and only Hermione chuckled as she was right next to him to hear the comment. Lavender looked at them oddly but smiled brightly the moment Ron showed up in his deep blue robes Lavender had chosen for him, those two next to each other made a huge contrast with his red hair and her dark blond locks while their clothes too were too much for the eye in colour.

'OK guys, we have to go and take everyone from the Burrow, we'll show up as family,' Lavender said and Harry and Hermione nodded their heads… Lavender was involved with the family since she was Ron's girlfriend but they weren't sure when she actually became one of the Weasleys, her words sounded a bit weird, especially when she didn't add that they could all leave together, even out of courtesy, but the two decided not to comment on all this as Ron seemed at least smiley at the anniversary of his brother's death.

The redhead smiled uneasy as he was dragged by his girlfriend away from the doorframe but before he could disappear in the corridor, he paused and looked at his best friends.

'I'll see you at the ministry… OK?' he asked to make sure everything was alright and Harry nodded his head while Hermione smiled and nodded too, even if the nods were short and Hermione's smile was fake, Ron either didn't notice or decided to ignore it as Lavender tugged at his hand and he left after another small smile of his own.

Harry and Hermione remained in silence after the floo took the other two Gryffindors away from the flat. The two didn't speak for a long time, hands clutched with each other, lips sealed, eyes staring at nowhere once again.

'_She is_ like chandelier…' Hermione finally said and Harry chuckled, it was a true chuckle that after the mental image of Lav in his head turned into a laugh, the first of the day, Hermione chuckled and laughed too and the two remained there like that laughing and grinning until that small feeling of humor left and the two tried to keep the grins on but failed.

'We should be going too, the soonest we get there, the more chances we have for a smaller crowd cheering and pointing at us…' Hermione said after a moment and Harry sobered again and cleared his throat.

'I don't want to go…' Harry said, his voice deep and husky after the hours he had spent on his own while Ron was getting ready with Lavender and Hermione had gotten prepared at Hogwarts.

'I know…' Hermione only said and he knew she understood, he could see in her eyes, in the small line between her eyebrows that was evident every time she tried to mask all the discomfort and all the pain a war hero and victim could feel. He could see her.

'We shouldn't go,' Harry said flatly and Hermione gave a dry chuckle.

'Yeah right,' she commented and stood up with her wavy hair following, she was ready to take her hand back but Harry tightened his hold on it and looked up at her as she was looking down at him, uncertain.

'I'm serious,' Harry said and Hermione sighed.

'Harry… honestly, come on, can you imagine the fuss? They may even send Aurors to find us to make sure none hit us as a reprisal…' Hermione pointed out and Harry shrugged.

'I don't care, I'm already registered as an Auror and I start next week… you're under my protection and they know that,' Harry said and Hermione rolled her eyes exasperated.

'Please… Can you imagine the fuss with the Prophet? They're going to turn mental with the two of us not showing up, they'll cook things up about the two of us and your history with the ministers during the war… you don't want just a few days before your start at the ministry…' Hermione tried and Harry shrugged again at her displeasure.

'I don't care…' Harry said again flatly and Hermione frowned.

'Honestly…' Hermione said again and this time Harry stood up and moved before her while her hand was still in his, keeping her close.

'Honestly what, Hermione? You really want to go and spend the night at the same table with the Weasleys while a lot of assholes will be passing by, shaking hands and knowing our names and faces just because we were the ones to do all the dirty work by destiny? Don't you have any better plans for the evening than spending it there with all the idiots from around Europe, clapping and cheering and then murmuring about how much more we could have done than showing up like that or this or whatever?' Harry asked in anger and exasperation, he didn't mean to sound so aggressive but he had enough and Hermione remained silent for a moment, he hadn't vented his frustrations all day and he felt guilty for doing so on Hermione, the only person that had been through as much as he had but maybe it was her luck, or her position as his backbone…

He waited for a moment more, certain that she was going to start lecturing on him about his behavior but he would never expect her hand slipping from his grasp and her arms wrapping around his shoulders in a tight hug as her eyes filled with tears. He wrapped his own arms around her body, ready to apologize, it was a charged day, of course he didn't want to make her cry, she usually was strong to take such blows, she was the only one not afraid of them when it was him screaming his head off.

'You're right, I don't want that,' she whispered close to his ear and Harry sighed, she wasn't crying because of his outburst, but because of her own suppressed feelings, Harry sighed in small relief and tightened his arms around her body, wanting to comfort her the best he could as their bodies felt warm against each other.

'I don't want anyone forcing us to do things, we had enough,' Harry whispered and felt Hermione nodding her head as she moved slightly away from his body, breaking the comforting hug first. Her eyes were full of tears and she sniffed as she tried to take them away with her hand.

'You're right, but what are we going to do? Just hide here?' Hermione asked and Harry this time smiled and shook his head.

'I'm sure we can go and hide somewhere else,' Harry said and Hermione smiled this time too.

'My parents are off to France again… in a seminar, we could go to my first house,' Hermione offered and Harry smiled and nodded his head, he had visited the place only few times since Hermione moved in with him and Ron after their final year at Hogwarts, but he always loved her first home, it was cozy and comforting and… Hermione-ish.

'OK then, we should go,' Harry said and took her hand again as he started for the door but Hermione paused him by tugging at his hand, Harry stopped and turned around, he was so happy they would not go to the ministry and he kind of felt afraid that she had second thoughts.

'Thanks…' Hermione said and Harry sighed and hugged her again.

'It's OK,' Harry only said and the two friends smiled at each other and nodded their heads.

The two apparated in Hermione's old playground, Harry smiled as he had seen the place from afar, when he was visiting Hermione's parents but he had never got there to see the area. He smiled as he saw the nostalgic feelings that flashed through her eyes as she had probably spent nice times in that place. Hermione was ready to move away and out of the playground but Harry paused her and gestured for her the swings, as if he had read her mind, she nodded her head and they moved close. She sat on a swing first and smiled at him as she adjusted her dress for the ride.

'Care to help me?' she asked and Harry grinned and moved behind the swing seat, he started pushing her to take some force and then he kept giving pushes to the swing until Hermione could manage the speed on her own with her body's movements. Harry grinned as his best friend squealed in happiness every time she felt him pushing the swing more while her hair danced around her beautifully…

'For someone who's afraid of flying, you're nailing the swing…' Harry said loudly and Hermione grinned as she kept going while he took a seat on the next swing and started too, he had longed for a nice ride with a broom, that feeling of freedom and flying, the last time he had the chance was when he practiced with the Gryffindors, a day after Crookshanks had died, even if not a broom, the swing was also entertaining.

'It has chains and an actual seat, Harry! It's not a piece of wood hundreds of feet from the ground…' Hermione retorted but squealed as Harry had managed to move along with her and he outstretched his hand to poke at her ribs while they moved up in the air. 'You're evil!' Hermione cried out but didn't dare to leave her hands from the chains, to Harry's immense amusement.

'That's me! Harry Evil Potter!' Harry called out and they both laughed as they kept moving with the swings while some people passing by the playground smiled at the image of the two grown people on the swings, playing carefree.

When the two were done with the swings and after Harry chased Hermione to the gates of the playground right before they could get scolded by an elder woman who muttered things about couples today, the two moved close to a small grocery store and bought a few things for dinner.

The two got inside the house by the door with Hermione's keys and turned on the lights of the empty house. They moved to the kitchen and with a wave of Hermione's wand, the muggle radio turned on and a muggle station started playing English songs, she could have turned on the Wireless magically but in days like this, they didn't want to hear a word from the Wizarding world.

They immediately lost themselves in each other's comfortable company while they cooked macaroni and cheese in the oven and sipped on one of the wines Hermione's father had in his collection. They listened to some songs, swayed a bit and laughed about their dancing skills until a happy song of _Madonna_ was replaced by one of the _Oasis_, "_where did it all go wrong_?".

_You know that feeling you get, you feel you're older than time_

_You ain't exactly sure if you've been away a while_

_Do you keep the reciepts for the friends that you buy?_

_And ain't it bittersweet you were only just getting by_

_But I hope you know that it won't let go_

_It sticks around with you until the day you die_

_And I hope you know that it's touch and go_

_I hope the tears don't stain the world that waits outside_

_Where did it all go wrong?_

_And until you've repaid the dreams you've bought for your lies_

_You'll be cast away alone under stormy skies_

_Alone under stormy skies_

_But I hope you know that it won't let go_

_It sticks around with you until the day you die_

_And I hope you know that it's touch and go_

_I hope the tears don't stain the world that waits outside_

_Where did it all go wrong?_

The two remained in silence as Gallagher's voice played the live version of the song, making them both feel the rhythm and the sadness, suddenly coming back to reality and remembering what date was and why they had hid in Hermione's old house… Hermione was with her back on the counter while Harry was next to her, his hip touching the counter as they played with their wine glasses while they heard the song, both in silence.

'Wow… this song can really take you down,' Harry whispered after taking his last sip of wine and Hermione chuckled sadly, the same little line between her brows returned like before, Harry noticed. Harry decided that he hated that line on her face; it had been four years ever since they fought and they deserved to get ridden of these lines of worry and pain from their faces. He reached out and touched her cheek with his hand, making her turn her head slightly for him to look at her eyes.

'I still remember your image in Hagrid's hands… I still remember my heart like dropping when he set you before His feet… I-…' Hermione started but her words were cut by a sob that escaped her lips and Harry took their glasses with his other hand and hugged the young woman tightly.

'I know… I still remember your screams at the Malfoys' manor, I still remember the pain in your eyes… I still remember everything…' Harry whispered back and caressed her curly hair as she wrapped her own arms around his frame. He had to admit, Hermione's hugs were the most familiar and comforting he could remember.

'I hate this… this feeling of being vulnerable all the time… I still have my wand beneath my pillow… afraid that I'll need it in the middle of the night,' Hermione whispered and Harry sighed and tightened his arms around her as he could remember her wand working as good as his own while he was taking patrols out of the tent and she was resting.

'Everything will be alright, Hermione, none is going to touch you without first getting over my dead body,' Harry whispered too and Hermione sniffed and nodded her head.

The sound of the stove, signaling the food was ready made the two part and Hermione took away her tears as she smiled up at her friend before she could move closer to the stove, Harry missed the feeling of her attached to him but he dismissed the thought as he decided on instead of standing there, he should help with the food.

The two moved their plates, the wine and the rest of the things they needed at the coffee table of the living room, they decided to eat in more comfortable positions than the seats of the dining room, so seating down on the carpet and opening the window for the May air to get inside was the perfect idea for the two as the radio kept on playing music.

'This is really nice,' Harry said as he took the first bites from his food and Hermione grinned and did the same.

'I was worried I would be as helpless at cooking as my mom,' Hermione said and Harry grinned.

'You mom cooks great, Hermione…' Harry said and Hermione chuckled and shook her head.

'OK, don't say this to anyone because she will disown me, but she's an awful cook, the times we ate here and you thought it was her food, dad had cooked, she just can't but she's too embarrassed to say it to the rest of the world so my dad cooks and she says she made it…' Hermione said and Harry looked at her shocked before he could grin.

'Wow, she shouldn't be ashamed of anything; she made a great child, that's enough to even all her weak spots…' Harry said with a grin and Hermione blushed and smiled at him gently.

'Thanks, Harry…' Hermione said gently and Harry grinned and clicked his glass with hers.

'To the memory of the people that passed that day,' Harry toasted, Hermione took her own glass and clicked it with his.

'To the ones who survived to respect the fallen ones,' Hermione toasted too and the two nodded slowly and drank from their glasses before they could continue their meal.

When their stomachs were full, the two kept sipping on their wine and soon the first bottle was finished. Hermione stood up from the floor with a little difficulty and moved to the cupboard her father had all the drinks and took out a bottle that made Harry's eyes widen.

'Firewhiskey?' Harry asked and Hermione grinned, the tip of her nose a bit pink from the wine they had already consumed as she returned to the floor, stumbling just a bit.

'Dad loves it, he tried it once at our flat and he loved it so I had to buy him a bottle for the house here. We just have to make sure we'll buy him another one before he's back,' Hermione said as she opened the bottle and poured liquid in their glasses. They didn't usually drink something stronger than butterbeer but it was a "special occasion" and as it seemed, only alcohol kept at bay the painful memories...

It didn't take long for them to start singing at every song, not necessarily knowing the lyrics, screaming out the lyrics they knew and hug each other while they kept filling their glasses while still on the floor. A few neighbors made some hushing sounds that were heard from the opened window but that made the two only laugh harder and louder as they kept drinking.

'Oh this was the best idea you had, Harry, we should never attend Balls ever again,' Hermione said before a small burp could escape her lips, causing both of them to start laughing hysterically again.

'Oh I know.. I just didn't want to spend time with all these idiots who think they know how is to be us,' Harry said as he pointed his finger at the firewhiskey before he could grip it and put it on his lips as to take another gulp, too dizzy to aim it in the glass, when he was done, he gave it to Hermione to take some gulps too.

'You're right, we have done a lot of mistakes back in the past but it was time for us to stop now,' Hermione said after she took down some gulps and Harry nodded his head as he took the bottle that she offered, glasses and music forgotten now.

'A lot of mistakes… so many mistakes… Ginny was a mistake,' Harry said as he drank from the bottle, he wasn't sure why he mentioned her but people say you need a little alcohol to know the truth by someone's lips.

'Well… Ron was a mistake too… a big, voracious mistake of mine,' Hermione said and chuckled before she could start laughing again, causing Harry to do the same before they could sober up a little bit and wobble in dizziness.

'You know… when he and I opened the locket… he saw his worst fear back then…' Harry said and Hermione tried desperately to focus on Harry.

'And what did he see? He never said a word about it,' Hermione asked and Harry tried to focus too.

'He saw me and you as a couple, you telling him that it was impossible for you to choose him when you had me, and then he saw us kissing….' Harry said and they both chuckled.

'And what did he do?' Hermione asked as she suppressed a giggle.

'He tried to kill me,' Harry said seriously but right after his words, the two started laughing with no control.

'And what did you do?' Hermione asked as she drank more of the firewhiskey.

'I told him you're like a sister—to me,' Harry said and Hermione actually fell back on the carpet in laugher before he could start laughing too, back then, it had felt right to say that thing, now, that he repeated it out loud, almost four and a half years later, it felt strange, false… no, it was the alcohol, it surely was…

'Oh that's smashing,' Hermione said between laughter.

'What did you see when you stabbed the cup?' Harry blurted out the question he had for a long time in his head. Hermione sobered up and sighed before she could give a chuckle, only this time, it was a sad one.

'Yeah… Ron was a mistake, we ALL have made mistakes…. You know, he even had a manual for how he should treat me, I had found it under his bed… honestly…' Hermione said, not answering Harry's question but he grinned as he knew what she was talking about.

'Twelve or Thirteen ways to do something to a witch or something….' Harry said and Hermione pointed her finger at him frantically in confirmation, even if they couldn't remember the title right that moment they both knew the book. 'Yea he had given it to me, thinking I'd use it, I don't even know where it is…' Harry added and the two started laughing again for no reason.

'Ginny was obsessed with you, I remember her having pictures of you from Witch Weekly under her own pillow… the Weasley kids have been hiding things beneath their pillows haven't they?' Hermione said and again, they both started laughing madly, Harry sobered for a moment to ponder on what Hermione had just said about Ginny but the mare image of his pictures under the redhead's pillow seemed funnier than scary right that moment so he started laughing again.

'You know, once…' Harry started and Hermione tried to focus on him again as the bottle kept moving between them like a tennis ball. 'It was the Christmas of sixth year, when you hadn't came to the Burrow, rights before the – hic- the attack from the Death Eaters…' Harry went on and Hermione made it to focus on him and listen. 'I was moving downstairs and she came out of her room in her robe, I had frozen and she approached me,' Harry kept saying and saw Hermione's eyes widening with a small hint of actual fear in them but he decided to keep up talking. 'I thought she'd kiss me or something but she suddenly leaned down and tied my shoe…' Harry said and Hermione's eyes widened even more as a chuckle escaped her lips.

'What?' Hermione asked and Harry nodded as he chuckled too.

'She tied my freaking shoe… and I have to tell you, she tied it too tightly too, I could feel my feet growing numb afterwards,' Harry said, the two remained in silence for a second before they could both start laughing harder than ever before, both leaning to the same direction until their heads bumped on each other's, they groaned, laughed and rubbed the spots of their foreheads with huge grins on their faces as now their faces were mare inches apart.

Harry felt mesmerized at the warm, chocolate brown of Hermione's eyes, the eyes he had seen so many times, her beautiful features, her warm presence close to him, his eyes moved for a moment from her eyes to her parted lips and he felt the urge to learn how their Horcrux kiss felt back then but he shook his head and closed his eyes, it was the alcohol.

All this comfortable feelings were Hermione but she was Hermione, the woman who cared about him the most, the woman that wasn't just a friend, she was someone too important to take advantage of in a moment of drunken judgment, even if the title of his sister sounded weird, sounded off, sounded impossible with her being the primal female in his life, the one for which he had stopped breathing when he had thought her dead at the Department of Mysteries or even before when she had been petrified by the Basilisk…the one who hugged and kissed him first, the one who talked to him about bravery and friendship and… more important things instead of tying his shoes…

She was Hermione and he wasn't going to spoil this, no, everyone had betrayed him at least once in his life, but Hermione hadn't, so he wasn't going to spoil this, she was too important for him and he was bloody toasted for Merlin's pants. People say that the mind is more clear than ever when you're drunk, when all the true wants are revealed but he wasn't going to face the consequences the next morning, he wasn't going to lose Hermione for a kiss that even thought delicious, was forbidden.

When he opened his eyes again, Harry came in contact with these two, warm eyes still looking at him as if she was thinking about something, counting something inside her bright yet drunk brain, he refused to look at her lips again so he focused on her eyes, even if they urged him to do things he hadn't thought of a few hours ago, he decided that her eyes were the safest place to look at for now. After an endless moment more, Hermione spoke.

'So many mistakes indeed, so many… irreparable mistakes,' Hermione said mostly to herself but for some reason these words were exactly the ones Harry wanted to say too…

* * *

ooooh ok, unanswered questions, regrets... mistakes... alcohol and some things re-considered... DARN they were that close to kiss weren't they? but they were also drunk, will they remember these little moments of epiphany in the future? we'll see

what u think guys? i wanted them away from the whole fuss of the wizarding world in such day, 2nd of may is actually my birthday and i love making shots about it hehe what u think of Lav Lav being a Weasley already and what about these two escaping, having fun in the swings and getting drunk and truthful...?

please review, the deal is awesome i have a lot of reviews and that makes my muse going on and on so please take a couple of minutes to review so i can take a few hours to make the new chapie that is already a bit formed in my head... as it seems many reviews make me update in 3 or 4 days...so if you like the story, your review can help me update the soonest

thanks for reading

p.s. about my new story: Blows Below the Belt, it will remain as an one-shot for now but i have some pretty interesting ideas in my head so alert me as an author and you'll be able to get every update that i make

CP09


	4. A Simple Question

Hey u guys! here is a new chapie, my life is just INSANE right not but dear hhr help me forget things and you are all here to support me so thank you so much for that

one thing that i forgot to have in A/N of the previous chapie:

to the guy who thought of the h/g tying shoe scene... THANK YOU! thanks for showing us EVEN more just how cold, awkard and false the pairing is! thank you for showing that instead of "sexual tension" and the presence of that "chest monster" harry had just an untied shoe and a lot of problems and life issues that ONLY hermione could solve for him WITH him while our little Ginerva Moly Weasley will be trying to steal the FAKE sword of Gryffindor in Hogwarts... Again... the Harmonians owe that one to you mate from WB We all salute you!

the new trailer will be out like in 55 mins at 5 am (greece time) so yeah, it's 4 am, be patient with some mistakes that you may find...

through my profile you can join my hhr dedicated site THE ONLY ONE FUNCTIONING IN THE WEB with constant updates about hhr in DH and more!

Enjoy...

* * *

Chapter Four – A Simple Question

May the 30th, 2002

Awkward.

Really awkward.

Ever since the 2nd of May and that drunk night, Harry Potter had been really awkward with the person he always felt comfortable around, Hermione Granger.

Harry was the type of person that when drunk, he would be content enough and afterwards, he could remember a lot of things if not everything. Since Hermione was as awkward around him, she was probably that kind of people while drunk too.

All the things he had considered while he had her close to him at her parents' house shouldn't have bothered him so much afterwards, it was supposed to be the alcohol making him think of all the things he had, making him question and wonder, making him regret and feel sorry for… Yet, here he was, twenty eight days later, still thinking over that night, like he had been doing for the past days and still being awkward around Hermione in the few times he saw her in the past weeks. At least his start as an Auror and her busy days with all the hyperventilating students that had to deal with OWLs and NEWTs had kept them apart for most of the time.

As Hermione had predicted, the _Prophet_ had gone mad with their absence at the Ball and Harry had to force himself inside his office through the crowds of reporters almost daily ever since, yet he hadn't regretted that night, even if Ron had complained about being left out when Lavender was the one inside the trio, splitting one third from the other two, Harry hadn't regretted that drunk talk he had with Hermione.

He wasn't sure how much she could remember, in the three or four time he had seen her ever since; they hadn't touched the subject, yet he was glad something had been cleared between them, even if so many more things had suddenly been fogged

'What you think, Harry? HAArryyy!' little Teddy Lupin was jumping up and down before his Godfather, efficiently drawing his attention when he stepped on Harry's foot while jumping, making the raven haired man groan and laugh.

'Looks awesome, buddy,' Harry finally said as he snapped out of his stupor. With the end of his training and the start at ministry along the Ball on the 2nd, the night of it and the confusing days that had followed, Harry hadn't made it to have a decent Teddy-Day as he called the days dedicated to his Godchild, he had his day off and had taken Teddy for his late birthday gifts and some fun time for both of them. Right now, choosing the four year old's first pet, since Adromeda had given the permeation, a beautiful owl would be great for the young boy that had started being school educated until he could attend Hogwarts.

The two got inside and bought the owl, Teddy had chosen, a beautiful brown forest owl along with treats and some other accessories the bird could need and then moved out of the shop, Harry carrying the cage that was too big for Teddy to hold without dragging it on the ground. The rest of Teddy's gifts were already shrunken and placed in Harry's pockets as to have the boy with no weight in his own.

'Aunt Mione bought a book for me for my birthday and she said there's a second book after it, could we go and buy it?' Teddy asked and Harry smiled.

'Hermione had visited you in your birthday?' Harry asked and Teddy nodded.

'For awhile, she had stopped by, gave me the gift and left, promising I'll see her again soon,' Teddy said as he looked up at Harry, his hair color changing into the chestnut color Harry knew so well, Hermione's colour. Harry felt guilty for not having the time not even to stop by, of course Hermione would have make some time as she was so organized.

'I'm sorry I couldn't be there too, buddy but I was in the last days of my training and they had taken us to a camp for the final tasks.' Harry said sincerely and the boy grinned and nodded, changing now his hair colour to black, matching Harry's.

'It's OK, Harry, I know, you grownups are all busy and stuff, now can we buy the book, please? Nana is almost done reading to me the one Mione bought,' Teddy said and Harry chuckled and nodded his head, glad that little children were so easily forgiving the grownups' mistakes.

Teddy knew the book by the cover and as it seemed it was one the most famous in the children's section, so he took it from the pile that was formed and moved close to the counter where Harry paid for it, after being informed by Mr Blotts that Hermione could stop by and take the books she had ordered, Harry reassured the owner of the famous bookstore that he'd inform his friend, thanked him and left with his Godson grinning happily for his new gift.

A children's broomstick, the owl, candies from George's store, the book and a few quills and parchments for painting were all the things Teddy had asked even if Andromeda had spoken only for the owl, Harry loved to spoil the little guy so he would just have to endure the lecture of the former Black sister when he would take Teddy home.

'What you want to do now, Teddy?' Harry asked as the two were moving through the crowd of Diagon Alley. Teddy had learnt never to leave his guardian's side so he was holding Harry's hand rather tightly to make sure he won't get lost.

'Uhm, could we eat?' Teddy asked and Harry grinned and nodded as he felt his stomach complaining.

'Awesome idea,' Harry said and Teddy grinned as the two men moved with no more words close to the Ice Cream store.

'I hope you have first eaten some proper lunch or Nana Meda is going to be seriously upset… combining all these gifts… she will lecture for hours.' A familiar voice to both was heard from behind them and Teddy immediately left Harry's hand, turned around and ran in Hermione's arms as the young woman leaned down and scooped the boy in her hands before she could give him a big kiss on the cheek and have one on her own in return. Harry smiled at Hermione even if he felt the awkwardness returning and she looked deep in his eyes a second before she could smile back at him.

'Hey,' Hermione said as she approached and Harry smiled as they hugged each other with one arm each since she was holding the toddler and he was holding the toddler's pet.

'Hey you, Mione,' Harry replied after a moment. 'You're out of Hogwarts?' Harry half-asked, half-pointed out and Hermione smiled wider.

'Well only the seventh years had examinations in the Magical care, their final subject and we had only two fainting and one being bitten by a hippogriff so I was done early and thought of coming here for a quick shopping trip, have ordered some books for my free time over the summer, the school will be closed in a few days.' Hermione said and Harry nodded his head.

'They have arrived, Mr. Blotts asked me to inform you,' Harry said and Hermione gave that old, Hermione-ish beam every time books were involved.

'But don't leave, Mione, have lunch with us and then go and take your books,' Teddy interjected and Hermione looked at Harry who nodded with a gentle smile before she could smile too.

'You guys are sure ok with me invading your guy day?' Hermione asked Teddy and he beamed at her and hugged her.

'Of course! Right, Harry?' Teddy asked his Godfather who smiled and nodded again.

'Absolutely Mione,' Harry said and Hermione smiled once again.

'OK then, but we'll eat a proper lunch at the Leaky Cauldron and then I'll buy us ice cream,' Hermione said and the two boys nodded at her words, none in his right mind would mess with Hermione's schedule of healthy meals and manners.

The trio started moving down the Alley, all the while Teddy being attached on the young woman's arms, happy to see her. He was always fond of Hermione and she always felt a soft spot for him, since she knew his parents so well, Lupin was the man that told her she was the brightest witch of her age, she had kept his secret in third year and had made her best to equalize his rights like she did with all the non-human or partly-human beings of the Wizarding world.

The trio got inside the Leaky Cauldron and found a table for themselves as Tom approached and took the order. Harry and Teddy showed Hermione all the things they had bought and Hermione smiled gently at the young boy when he showed the book they had bought.

'Oh you liked the first one? I wanted to buy you the second but I waited for you to finish the first,' Hermione said and Teddy smiled.

'Nana is reading it to me every night so we almost finished it,' Teddy said proudly and Hermione smiled and nodded her head. Harry watched the two as the boy's hair changed again in Hermione's colour.

'You're going to be like aunt Mione, I think, a great student,' Harry said and Hermione smiled at him as she blushed slightly, for now all the awkwardness forgotten.

'Nana says daddy was a great student too,' Teddy said and the two adults sobered and looked sad.

'He was, Teddy, and an excellent teacher as well,' Hermione said as she smiled sadly at the boy while Harry nodded his head.

'Hey don't be sad! Daddy is up there watching right now, that's what Nana says,' Teddy said as he looked at the two and they both smiled and nodded their heads at the boy's sweetness.

'You're right, Teddy, he's right up there,' Harry said and smiled at the boy who was set at one of his sides, opposite Hermione who was sat next to Harry by the other side.

'So, have you talked about Quidditch yet or I have to endure?' Hermione asked, trying to change the subject and the boys grinned both.

'No we haven't yet, you're unlucky,' Harry said teasingly and Teddy laughed. 'And we haven't even talked about the massive news.' Harry added and Hermione groaned.

'One more time and I will explode,' Hermione said and Teddy laughed harder at the woman's exasperated face.

'Uncle Ron is summoned from the couch of the national team for the keeper's position in the upcoming Quidditch World Cup in August!' Harry said out loud and Teddy cheered while Hermione grinned at both and their try to actually make her explode.

'And people in Hogwarts, Hongsmeade, the ministry and every other place I have been is asking me somehow to find tickets for the matches, as if I'm in charge of anything close to that.' Hermione grumbled and Harry grinned.

'Well if it makes you feel better, there was a magical riot downtown and I had to go and stop some guys from firing charms randomly, one of the victims was a squib and after realizing it was me in the team, and congratulating and thanking for the whole war thing, he actually asked if I could find tickets for him…' Harry said and Hermione laughed and rolled her eyes.

'Oh at least I'm not alone in the world!' Hermione said with humor in her eyes.

'You will never be,' Harry said seriously even if Teddy was chuckling, the humor left her eyes and they looked deep in each other's orbs once again, before Tom could arrive with their meals.

They started eating, Hermione her spaghetti, Harry his steak and potatoes and Teddy his meatballs and rice – after Hermione cut the meatballs in half so they could be less hot- they clicked their glasses of pumpkin juice and when Teddy set his glass down, Hell broke loose.

'Why don't you two get married?' the little boy asked with genuine wonder in his now emerald green eyes while his hair remained the chestnut brown.

Harry felt the potato rising up his throat as he had just swallowed and soon he was coughing with his eyes tearing up because of the sudden change of the food's direction. He gripped the napkin by his plate and coughed harder while Hermione was in a similar fate with her bite of spaghetti. Teddy was still looking expectantly for the two to survive.

'Uhm, well, Teddy, why should Harry and I get -married?' Hermione asked with a tone of wonder but with something more Harry couldn't place or like if he had to admit.

'Why should you not? You love each other, don't you?' Teddy replied with a question.

'Of course we do,' both Harry and Hermione answered and glanced at each other before they could brush off the jump their hearts performed.

'Well, there you go,' Teddy said, Hermione smiled and Harry guessed she had some diplomatic way to clear things out.

'Well I love you too but I think we can't get married…' Hermione said teasingly and Teddy grinned but shook his head.

'Uhm no, I guess but you don't love me the same, right?' Teddy replied with another question and Hermione brightened up.

'Exactly, and I love Harry like a brother,' Hermione said and Harry watched her. 'And he loves me like a sister…' she added, there it was again, that odd feeling he had felt twenty eight days ago, this was supposed to be the truth, he had said it out loud first, years ago, now why was he feeling like that when he heard the things he had said, having Hermione adding her last words a bit curtly maybe?

'But you're both only children like me, how can you know you love each other like siblings? You don't have siblings.' Teddy pointed out and Hermione's previous beam darkened. Harry decided to try and rescue her. 'You said you love him,' Teddy pointed out and Hermione nodded. 'And do you, Harry?' Teddy asked his Godfather.

'Of course I love her,' Harry said firmly as he felt her eyes on him. 'However, the fact that I love Hermione and she loves me doesn't mean that we have to get married, Teddy…' Harry tried this time and looked at the little boy before him, all the while realizing that he was saying even like that, "I love you" to someone for the first time, he had never said it to Ginny, not even right before his departure for the Horcrux Hunt or right after it, when they had reunited or in the few months their relationship had lasted. 'Right, Hermione?' Harry asked in addition to his words as to both get confirmed and to ignore the feeling of realization.

'Yes, yes of course, we're best friends.' Hermione rushed to say and nodded her head as she pinned her eyes on Teddy and didn't look at Harry. The raven haired man turned his head and looked at his Godchild again, sure the uncomfortable talk was over, he was mistaken as he realized by Teddy's face.

'Well my daddy and mommy were friends too, Nana told me that and that you two have sacrificed everything for each other, just like mommy and daddy did.' Teddy added with the pure honesty only a four year old could manage, making the situation even more complex with the mention of an actual couple that started as friends and only death took them apart as a couple. 'And nana never said that Ron or Ginny that are siblings for real ever sacrificed everything for each other or for you,' the boy added, to make matters worse.

Food and drinks forgotten the two adults stared at the boy for a few moments as he was looking at them too, a glimpse of triumph shining in his green eyes. 'So… _when_ you two will get married?' his first question was restored with a better one. Harry shook his head as Hermione sighed deeply.

'Wait, buddy, hang on, your mom and dad _fell in love_ with each other, loving someone is not the same with falling in love with them,' Harry tried, not sure if he could explain the question that was to come.

'What do you feel when you're in love?' the question arrived and Harry glanced at Hermione again who sighed and decided to try and help once again.

'Well…' Hermione started. 'You want to do your best for the person you're in love with,' Hermione started and Harry nodded his head, deciding to help her.

'You want to be high in that person's eyes, not to disappoint…' he added and Hermione nodded too.

'You can know what the other wants just by looking at the eyes,' Hermione added with her turn and Harry nodded, glad he would finally end this when they would have explained to Teddy.

'You must be feeling like losing your breath if something happens to that person,' Harry added again.

'You have to be reaching for that person's hand anytime you feel like it and not hesitate,' Hermione said this time, both of them more comfortable by every passing moment.

'You have to put the other person's needs above yours no matter what, you have to function like one being,' Harry added and Hermione glanced at him for a moment before she could nod her head.

'You have to able to read that person's mind, know what that person needs, be there at that person's worse and yet, never expect something in return…' Hermione added and the two adults looked at the young boy uncertain, they had been carried away with their explanation, forgetting that they're talking to a four year old…

'Yeah… well, uhm… do you feel like that for each other?... Or have you done the things you just said about each other?... And I have some words that I don't know what they mean…' Teddy said as Harry and Hermione looked at each other again, that awkwardness suddenly magnifying inside them.

The silence stretched for several moments, moments of the two staring at each other. Harry was looking at Hermione, too afraid to even consider that these twenty eight days of awkwardness now reached their peak because a truth had been revealed.

No, he was an adult, a grown man; if he had fallen for Hermione, he would have noticed! He had been feeling all the things he and she had described but no, Hermione was… Hermione was Hermione! She was always there, at the mare thought of him having lost what was in front of his eyes for all these years made him feel completely stupid, his eyes showed all these things, his denial and since they did, she could see as they stared at each other's eyes.

'Uhm we have, but we're like siblings,' Hermione finally said, after her eyes narrowed for a fraction of the second before she could tore her gaze and look at Teddy who just snorted, chuckled and shrugged before he could return to his meatballs.

'Fine….sure, what is "functioning"?' the boy finally surrendered and asked the first of the words that didn't know the meaning of.

The rest of the meal lasted only a few more minutes, Hermione ate a couple more bites of the food she previously was eating with much more eagerness, just like Harry was with his own but then she announced that she had to go and take her books and return to Hogwarts as she had remembered a forgotten job she had to take care of , before Teddy could complain Hermione asked of Harry to take the boy for the promised ice cream and Harry nodded absentmindedly as his mind was already away.

Hermione might had left, after kissing Teddy on the cheek and saying to Harry she'd soon see him again at their flat, he and Teddy might had finished their meal, went for the ice cream that Harry didn't even touch until the poor thing melted in the small bowl. They might had returned in Andromeda's house, where the older woman lectured about the redundant gifts of Teddy but then surrendered and gave Harry a cake for his flat with Hermione and Ron, yet Harry's mind was still away, thinking the things he and Hermione had told Teddy about people being in love.

He had thought he was in love with Ginny, but had he ever cared of being high in her eyes? Of reaching for her help even if he would put her to danger, just because he knew he couldn't function intact otherwise? Why he never told her he loves her, he indeed loved her like he did with other people and back then he was supposedly _in love_ with her, why he never felt like saying it?

He had been looking at her dot in the map when he was in the tent and right before Voldemort could cast the Avada, he had thought of her lips' texture, yet, why he hadn't thought of her eyes, or the way her hand felt in his? Why her voice never became the one of his consciousness? Why he didn't search for her first thing when the battle was over? Instead he had tried to find his best friends…

Why he never made it to read another girl's eyes? Cho, his first crush, or Ginny, his first complete relationship. Why hadn't it worked back then? Why everyone thought he and Hermione were an item? People, from the four year old Teddy who made them answer what falling in love is, up to Ron, his and Hermione's best friend, the person whose worse fear was once of them ending up together and Hermione choosing him over Ron.

Harry groaned loudly as a headache started building and he felt his temples throbbing as he had been frozen before a bench in the park close to his flat that he somehow had apparated in. he sat on the bench with the cake resting on his lap, like his hands that held it did, his eyes staring at nowhere.

Could he?

Could he be so blind?

Hermione had been there all the time; would he have not noticed something? She had been doing the things they had described too, would they have noticed something? It had been more than a decade ever since they met, of course they were young during the first years of their friendship but later on she had showed signs of fancying Ron, maybe not loving him but fancying him for sure, and then _she_ had kissed Ron before the battle. Harry remembered that old uncomfortable feeling in his stomach. But _she_ had remained by _his_ side and not Ron's in the tent, when Ron actually left, and then it was Hermione who got tortured and yet she didn't betray Harry.

Hermione was the one to do so many things for him, to sacrifice everything for him.

"…_I love Harry like a brother…"_

"… _And he loves me like a sister…"_

"…_we're best friends…"_

"…_we're like siblings…"_

Her words felt more awkward and unpleasant than what he'd like to admit, but they did, this was supposed to be the truth, well this was the truth for _her_ since she had spoken it out loud. They were _supposed_ to be like siblings, he groaned as more questions flew in his head, questions like _who_ put these "rules", these "limits" to their hearts and _why_ and under what circumstances so many decisions had been made and so many standards had been set back then and _how_ much objective these "rules" and these "limits" could be when set up during a war, when everything was under such pressure?

With a shake of his head, Harry decided to spare himself the torture of answering all that, until for now.

He loved Hermione, that was a unchangeable _fact_ and it was _something_, his headache and his inner fear prevented him to dig deeper inside him, maybe he should let sleeping dogs lie as he wasn't even sure why he was searching for something that if indeed true, could jeopardize the most important bond he ever had with someone, his friendship with the only person that never abandon him: Hermione Granger.

* * *

oh Oh OH! what happened? someone decided to run away from things that surfaced? mm someone is scared of messing up with his friendship... someone is losing a great marriage and some awesome sex... YEP the name is Harry! lol what u think guys?

We had a lot of teddy which i love, and wasn't it awesome to have them explaining what falling in love is by using examples of personal experience? and yep Teddy is so honest and true and insightful (he reminds of me of sweet little Rosalie from Wasted op.)

i know some will say that a 4 year old has a pet owl? well i think he would since he is supposed to be raised the magical way, you know little children can use the phone if told the number so magical little children should know how to send owls i guess

what u think of the hhr awkwardness mm hermione left quiet early and in a haze and harry decided to chicken out for now.. well did he do a good job or he should dare dig deeper inside to see what's on? maybe he needs a stimulant?...

please review and tell me what u think guys so i can have the motive for ANOTHER quick update : )

CP09


	5. Normal or Not

_OK OK the deal is not broken guys, sorry for the delay but my life right now id really hectic and this specific chapie was really challenging for me, as you've noticed, i update a few hours after i have answered the reviews, that is because i am reading the reviews again and again when i'm stuck with an update. of course it's 03.43 am and of course i love you for all the support you show for this story, i won't babble further because Lucious, my British white-cinnamon brown cat already looks at me funny, wanting me to go to bed so he can come too and snuggle for the rest of the night._

Enjoy...

_

* * *

Chapter Five – Normal… or Not_

_June the 18__th__ 2002_

Normal.

Everything was finally normal again, ever since that afternoon and the headache that followed and lasted a few hours that day. Harry Potter had decided that a beautiful night at the Three Broomsticks, a drunken night on the 2nd of May, a few days of tension, odd feelings and a talk with a four year old weren't enough to show such a life-changing thing as falling for Hermione, he would have noticed! So he had decided that any kind of feelings or thoughts about the subject were just due to the pressure he had endured with the end of his training and the start in his new job.

The fact of him being perfectly fine with Hermione in the days that followed that uncomfortable-to-say-the-least, lunch with Teddy was his biggest proof. She might had been odd at that lunch, like he was himself, he was sure, but ever since the two were just fine around each other in the few times they had met. Harry had also decided, as to move on with his thinking of the whole thing being just a wrong trail of acting and thinking, to keep up with dates in his life, he was a single bloke, and in his new job in the ministry, there were a few quiet pretty birds he could do something with. He had stopped for a long time, a _really_ long time and maybe it was about time for him to go back in action. Everyone or _almost_ everyone had been paired, so now it was probably time of him to find someone too. The Gryffindors of his generation had gotten very close post war, since some of them had even become couples; the rest had gotten close too.

'So master, are you satisfied with the way Kreacher keeps the house?' the elf asked his master and pulled him out of thoughts as the young man was visiting Grimmauld like he did once a month. He might wasn't living there but he had decided to keep the place, other people would have sold it or just abandon it but Harry had decided to keep it as in Sirius' will, he let it to him and Harry had decided to honor his Godfather's decision by renovating it with Ginny and Hermione's help some years ago, he had kept Kreacher, who thankfully was alive and glad to serve him after the war, and even if he didn't live in, he visited the place once a month to make sure the house elf was fine and to make sure the house didn't need anything due to its age.

'It's perfect, Kreacher, well done, fell free to keep taking money from the account anytime you think the house needs something.' Harry praised and the elf bowed and smiled slightly.

'Will you have dinner here, sir? Should Kreacher make something?' the elf asked and Harry shook his head.

'Tonight is Ginny's engagement party so I will eat something there, but thanks for offering…' Harry said and with a smile he thought that Hermione would be proud of him being so good to the elf, especially since it came natural to him. The elf nodded again. 'But I'll take Miss Hermione sometime for lunch here, if you want to see her again, that is,' Harry added and the elf smiled a bit.

'Even if she changed the house of the Black family in… a different way than the one Kreacher was used to, she's always welcome, she's like a sister to you after all,' the elf said and Harry smiled even if his stomach tightened at the elf's words. _Darn it!_

'Right… well, I have to go and take her from Hogwarts. Make sure to keep the house and yourself safe,' Harry said and the elf nodded again and bowed before Harry could move out of the house, let the spell hide it once again and then moved to the apparition point.

The next moment he was apparating out of the gate with the flying bears. The grounds were full of people as in the middle of the third week of June, the students were going back to their homes. Harry smiled as he got inside the grounds and tried to move away from the path to the gates as he didn't want to draw attention, however, a lot of students waved and called out for him. Harry just blushed smiled and waved while some Gryffindors started singing some of the most famous songs that had been composed after the war for him. Harry was still smiling at the Gryffindors when he suddenly bumped on a small boy from Hufflepuff.

'Ops, sorry,' Harry said as he moved back a step, the boy was looking up at him with angry blue eyes while with one hand he was holding a basket with a ginger cat inside, his brown hair was messy and ruffled because of the impact with Harry.

'You're Harry Potter!' the boy said and Harry nodded a bit oddly, the boy had voiced the words as if he was spilling poison.

'Uhm and you are…?' Harry tried and with the corner of his eyes he saw some also young boys smacking their faces with their palms.

'You'll learn in time… for now, just keep in mind that you might defeated You Know Who… but if you hurt Hermione… I'll make sure you regret the day you were born,' the boy said and pointed his index finger at Harry whose eyebrows shot up in surprise. He wasn't sure if he should laugh or get worried but he decided to be nuclear as he remembered Hermione's admirer, she had talked about him in that reunion dinner.

'Uhm… OK…' Harry finally said and the boy glared at him. At that moment a few young Hufflepuffs and a Ravenclaw approached the duo and practically dragged the glaring boy away as he kept pointing his finger at Harry who just chuckled and moved on inside the castle.

Harry moved quickly inside the castle, trying to avoid more students as he finally arrived before Hermione's quarters. A painting of two young angels was shielding the door.

'Harmony,' Harry said the password and the angels smiled and allowed him in. Harry moved inside and was surprised to see that Hermione wasn't alone in the common room. Seamus and Hermione looked up at Harry from the couch they were sat, Seamus blushed furiously, stood up like Hermione did and hugged her.

'Thank you, Hermione, whatever your decision will be, thanks…' the young man said in a low voice before he could move away from her, wave at Harry and floo away without letting them utter a word.

'Uhm… bye?' Harry said as the green flames were flashing with the floo working, Hermione smiled at Harry and after a moment, moved close and hugged him tightly, he answered the hug immediately, wrapping his arms around her like he had done so many times in the past and when they parted he spoke.

'What did Seamus want?' Harry asked, his curiosity getting the better of him.

'Nothing… just a favor that I'm not sure I can do yet, anyway, can you wait for awhile? So I can get ready?' Hermione asked and Harry smiled and nodded his head. Hermione smiled too, left his arms and moved inside her chamber, Harry sat down on one of the armchairs and looked around him, noticing that all her books and belongings were packed up in shrunken boxes that now were on the coffee table.

'Should we take your boxes with us? Have them in the flat after the party?' Harry called out and waited for Hermione to respond.

'Yes! I'll have them in my pockets when I'm out,' Hermione said but Harry was already taking them in his as to save her from the trouble.

'Got them!' he called out again and waited for her to get ready. 'So… is your admirer from Hufflepuff with a bit of Slytherin deep inside?' Harry asked and heard Hermione chuckling.

'Why you say that?' Hermione asked just a few moments later all ready and beautiful, as Harry had to admit mentally… she wore a purple dress to her knees and had her hair up in a bun with just a few locks escaping her face, a light make up and a pair of flat shoes. Harry smiled and stood up, he didn't say a word about her but his smile was enough.

'Well he threatened I'll regret the day I was born if I ever hurt you,' Harry said and Hermione actually giggled.

'My sweet Mark… he's just too protective of me…' Hermione said with humor in her voice and Harry grinned too.

'Well at age of thirteen I could perform a Patronus so I'll make sure to have my eyes open when around him, next season,' Harry said and Hermione grinned, he was so happy he could act normal around her again.

'Or, you could always take care of not hurting me….' Hermione said and Harry's grin evaporated from his face, suddenly the thoughts of not digging up things inside him as not to lose her as a friend and hurt her of course surfaced without him expecting and they hit him at full-force.

'Harry… are you alright? It was just a joke…' Hermione added quickly and he snapped out of it, nodded and smiled finally before he could stretch his hand for her to take.

'We should be going or we'll miss the food, Ron's there already!' Harry said quickly, maybe too quickly but he wasn't going to think more about it, Hermione still looked unconvinced.

'Speaking of being hurt… are you alright with Ginny getting engaged…. You know, is everything ok?' Hermione asked uneasy and Harry frowned in confusion and shrugged.

'Because we had a relationship like three years ago? Yeah I think I can survive…' Harry said with humor and Hermione only smiled and nodded her head as the two moved hand-in-hand to the floo and from there, to the Burrow.

The two were received with enthusiasm and hugs from the people already there, first Mrs. Weasley, then Ginny and Dean and then the rest with Ron being the last to hug them with his mouth full of chocolate cake while Lavender stood proud by his side.

'Shouldn't you be careful with your diet? Especially with the World Cup approaching?' Hermione asked and Ron groaned with his mouth still full.

'You 'ound like my coac'!' Ron complained and Lavender grinned by his side.

'Well be sure that if your broom could speak, it would say the same things with me…' Hermione replied and Harry chuckled, indeed, Ron had formed a small lump for a stomach that now was cupped by Lavender teasingly.

'I'll make sure he burns all the calories.' She said and both Hermione and Harry frowned while Ron coughed in embarrassment with his ears turning red.

'Enough information about my brother's activities… I made it not to vomit with all the stress for the party, you won't ruin my stomach now,' Ginny interjected with a frown as she got between Harry and Hermione and pushed Harry away while she took one of her best female friends by the arm.

'We have things to discuss you and I…' she said with a teasing smile and Hermione seemed to get the hint and nodded, Ginny then turned to Harry, Ron and Lavender. 'Excuse us for a moment…' Ginny said and Harry nodded, while he gazed at Hermione with curiosity as the brunette tried to avoid his gaze and she followed the redhead.

'Is everything alright between you two?' Ron finally asked as Lavender excused herself for a moment and Harry looked at his friend with curiosity.

'Two as…?' He asked not sure if Ron was referring to Ginny and himself like Hermione had done before they arrived.

'… as in you and Hermione…?' Ron half-asked half-pointed out as if it was obvious and Harry frowned in confusion and slight alert.

'What do you mean?' Harry asked and Ron shrugged this time.

'I don't know… you look… _too_ fine? Like, it's forceful?' Ron suggested and Harry rolled his eyes, the alert inside him growing more intense, no, everything was fine!

'Ron, I think the extended time on the broom up in the air with the whole practice is getting into you… we're just fine!' Harry said hotly, maybe too hotly if he just wanted to get his point across. Ron even a bit taken aback at the small outburst, shrugged once more.

'OK… I'm just saying…. I want you to be ok, mate.' Ron said and Harry sighed as he looked at the buffet where Hermione and Ginny were standing, before the buffet there was a rich fabric hiding the path upstairs so all the guests could remain on the ground floor. Harry stood there, watching for a few more moments until Dean, Ron and Neville lured him into conversation for the upcoming Quidditch World Cup.

It was a few minutes later, when Ron had reassured them that he was going to make it in his part and England would pass through the groups to the finals as it had been sorted with Bulgaria, Italy and China. Harry excused himself as to have a drink and he approached the buffet, Hermione by now was close to the kitchen door, talking animatedly with Mrs Weasley and Fleur about something.

'I'm telling you, Gin, if she accepts I'll be so happy… I've put Ed through so much with all this,' Seamus' voice was heard from somewhere and Harry actually looked around him to find the source of his voice.

'I'm sure she will think about it, Seamus… after all, Hermione is the one who can do this since she's the only single right now. And she was always willing to help everyone.' Ginny's voice was heard after a moment and Harry found the source of the voices, both Ginny and Seamus were probably hidden behind the curtain that blocked the way upstairs.

Harry was ready to move away with his butterbeer but his curiosity decided otherwise, it was about Hermione and Harry had been wondering what Seamus' favor was about ever since he saw him, having Hermione brushing it off had intrigued Harry even more.

'I know, I mean she's so good to even think about it, but ever since these straight urges of mine started… I need to know what's on with me so I won't torture Edward anymore, a try with Hermione will help me realize what I want, if she agrees of course…'

Harry wasn't sure what this thudding sound was at first, after a few moments of standing there, he realized it was his own blood boiling through his vein, his blood pressure accelerated within moments and he felt like cursing everyone around him with the worse curses ever invented.

He had felt uncomfortable before, when Hermione would date someone, Ron for example, and of course he knew that she probably had a complete relationship with him since they were together for months after the war. But right now, the mare thought of her sleeping with someone, let alone Seamus, even for him to try and see whatever he wanted to see about his dick, made Harry's blood reach the boiling point.

_Does it bother you, Potter, that she's willing to help someone else than you as much as she once did with you?_

_Would you be as mad if it was Ginny in her shoes? _

_Is Hermione supposed to be helping only you? Is she supposed to be there only for you? Why? She's only like a sister figure to you… not your girlfriend, not your wife…_

The voice that once expressed his anger for Ron being the Prefect over himself was heard mockingly inside his head.

She… she was supposed to be… no, He was supposed to take care of her, not let her make mistakes, she had sacrificed herself before, this was out of the line, she might hadn't agreed yet but this was over the limits, she shouldn't be doing such a thing with her body for anyone. It was his duty as… her friend to stop her!

With these thought he slammed his butterbeer on the buffet's top and rushed close to her from the living room to the kitchen, before either Fleur or Mrs. Weasley could utter a word, Harry was gripping Hermione by the arm and was practically dragging her outside, in the silent backyard. Hermione's surprise at the sudden outburst was all over her face as rage was all over his own.

'Harry, what are you doing? Let me go!' she called out angrily and tried to jerk away, the second time did the trick as they were both away from the building and Harry finally released her arm and faced her with angry eyes.

'Are you completely mental?' he asked in utter anger, Hermione's surprise changed into anger as she looked up at his eyes.

'You're calling me mental when you _dragged_ me out here like a caveman? What is this all about?' she demanded and Harry chuckled sarcastically and threw his arms in the air in exasperation before he could leave them hit his body.

'Oh what is this all about?' he asked ironically and Hermione nodded with a frown on her face. 'This is about your stupid consideration of actually sleeping with Seamus _freaking_ Finnegan so he can prove that his dick wants boys and not girls!' he screamed out and Hermione looked at him in utter shock before she could blush furiously.

There was an uncomfortable silence between them, the magic around them was actually crackling in the air as the two glared daggers at each other, their eye-lock never breaking until Hermione blinked and shook her head after these moments.

'First, it's none of your business, second, it's my decision and none else's, and last but not least, keep your voice down because this is about Seamus' life and not yours, and I would expect you'd be more delicate with such matters.' Hermione finally said her voice low and disappointed, yet firm and angry. Harry tried to ignore the dropping of his stomach as indeed her words were right, yet his stubbornness didn't allow him to stop yet.

'It might be your body but you can't just waste yourself around for everyone!' Harry said in an angry voice once again and Hermione grimaced.

'Waste myself? Even if it's none of your business as I already said, I will clarify this to you. Seamus asked me of a favor and I said I'll _think_ about it, I don't take physical encounters lightly but I want to help a friend and he trusts me enough to try something that for him is even scary…' Hermione replied in that same tone that made Harry feel more and more of a prick as the moments passed by.

'I don't want you to do it,' Harry insisted and Hermione huffed.

'None asked you, Harry, and I didn't say I will do it and what is your problem? Did I ever said a word about the girls you brought in our flat? The girls you dated? Did I ever gotten in the middle even if I liked none of them?' Hermione finally retorted and Harry sighed.

'These were dates Hermione! And don't refer to them as if they were millions or something, and even then, I didn't sacrifice or use my body just to have them experimenting on me!' Harry said in a loud voice again and Hermione looked behind her, at the house to make sure none had heard them before she could glare back at him.

'They were _seven _and as I told you, I'm not sure yet, it will be a favor, not a sacrifice for the love of Merlin! You had one-night-stands with some of them… think about it like that for me too,' Hermione said and Harry felt his stomach dropping both at the accusing way she had said the number of the girls he had dated and the one-night-stand thing.

'So you would have an one-night-stand with me too, If I wanted to discover things?' Harry asked provoking her as he moved a step closer to her, closing the distance that had been created when he released her arm, their bodies a mere inch apart, he could feel with his entire body her body's warmth and even their magic as he was so close to her.

'No,' she said flatly as she was looking up at him firmly. His heart ached almost painfully at her single word.

'Why not?' Harry asked quickly and Hermione sighed, broke their eye contact and tried to move a step back but he held her there by the arms, causing her to look up at him once more.

'Because you would never ask something like that… because you and I are… Hermione started in a slow voice, Harry only nodded as they looked in each other's eyes while their bodies almost touched in some places, 'and because I'm like a sister to you…' she added and he felt like groaning as his stomach dropped once again, was it just him or she was saying these words in the past weeks as if they were an insult?

This was supposed to be a fact, once admitted by _him_ easily, right after he had been threatened to be murdered… yet, it had been admitted anyway, why did it bother him so much when he heard it from her lips? He had said it in the past, why was it something so annoying now? Sometimes the past is something you just can't let go of... And sometimes the past is something we'll do anything to forget. And sometimes we learn something new about the past that changes everything we know about the present, was it something like that now as well?

'ARE YOU BOTH MENTAL? DO YOU WANT GIN TO KILL ME? **BEFORE** THE CUP? Ron's bellowing voice made them both move away from each other and break their gazes as Ron rushed close to them from inside the Burrow. 'Why the bloody Hell you're screaming your heads off?' he demanded to know and Hermione sighed and shook her head as he first looked at her and then at Harry that now that he had snapped out of his thoughts, caused by her close presence in his arms, his mind returned to the stubborn prick mode.

'I'm trying to stop Hermione from doing something she might regret,' Harry said as she looked at him with eyes that shown warning, Ron wasn't like Harry, and if he could be a prick once, Ron could be thousands times over, having him once being Hermione's boyfriend didn't help the situation.

'You're not changing profession and leaving the country, are you?' Ron asked and Hermione rolled her eyes and shook her head exasperated.

'OK you know what? tTis is none of your business and since Gin will probably tell you as not kill the wrong person, let me spare her the torture… Seamus asked me of a personal favor that involves me having a one-night-stand with him so he can decide what he wants in that department… satisfied?

'Now you both know something that considers only Seamus and Me! It's none of your business, this is my body and willingly given to whoever I choose, I'm like a sister to _both_ of you _by now_ so end of conversation. I'll do what I want to do and the least you can do is to stop having your heads inside your asses and not say a word that would embarrass Seamus or me, can you do that much?' Hermione said in a breath and Ron changed several colors, opened his mouth in a try to stop her several times and finally closed his gaping jaws and fell in silence as the trio stood there, facing each other with flushed faces. Harry's mind had remained on her words about her body being given willingly and her denial at the possibility of sleeping with him…

'Uhm… do you… do you realize that… he… Seamus I mean… I mean his… you know… has been… in Ed's… you know… while they… _you know!_…' Ron tried desperately and Harry felt actually sick while Hermione huffed exasperated once again.

'You're trying to say that his penis has been inside Edward's anus since they were in an active relationship for months now? Yes I've figured out that much and _IF_ I agree, I will use a muggle condom of course, along all the needed spells,' Hermione said coldly, causing the two men before her to flush even more at her words. Harry finally looked at Ron.

'Your problem is about the technical side of the situation?' he finally asked and Ron looked at him sheepishly.

'Well she wants to help… she always does… uhhm usually using her brains, I guess now she can help with her body too? You had one-night-stands, I had one-night-stands, we took none's permeation, I guess she can do the same…?' Ron tried and both Harry and Hermione looked at him shocked and uncomfortable.

'Thank you!' Hermione said astonished as Harry huffed.

'Unbelievable!' Harry called out and Ron shook his head.

'I mean, yeah, it sounds gross, but… it's her body indeed…' Ron said and Hermione nodded her head and looked at Ron with a smile while she frowned when she looked at the already frowned face of Harry's.

'OK Harry, you know what, thanks for the…try to guide me, but as Ron said, it's my body indeed and I decide how to handle myself, none else, so if I'll do it with Seamus or not, you will never know because this is closed HERE!' Hermione finally said and drawn the lines as she stamped her foot once, before she could turn around and move towards the Burrow with her dress flapping around her legs. Harry and Ron watched her until Harry looked at his best male friend.

'You were great help there, Ron, well done,' Harry said accusingly as none else was there to take the blows, Harry felt so confused.

'Sorry mate but she's doing whatever she wants… after all, did she ever preach to you what to do with the chicks you met?' Ron asked and Harry actually groaned this time as it was the second reference to his past dates.

'It's different!' Harry retorted and Ron shrugged.

'Well it was _you_ choosing what to do with _your body_… sounds pretty much the same to me…' Ron tried and Harry huffed.

'Oh shut up!' he finally said as he had nothing else to come up with.

The moment the backdoor of the Burrow was slammed shut by the furious brunette that had just gotten in, Harry finally admitted that this _thing_ he felt, whatever it was… it was not normal... and he didn't know for how much longer he was going to fight it…

* * *

Hoho ok, i know that some of you think that hermione wouldn't do something like that but i think that if she trusted someone and there was no emotional trouble, like where this would end or what it meant, i guess she would have a one night stand with a friend that would like to discover some things... she's a young woman after all, anyway, i let it hanging for now since she hasn't decided yet : P and don't get me wrong, i'm a straight young woman but i have no problem with gay people, i actually have friends that are gay and lesbians and everything is cool for me, i just wanted to show the side of a straight man? it's harder for them than what it is for girls i think

what u think guys? we had the admirer, haha i love deathly 12 year olds, i have a cousin that is like 158cms tall and he's threating to reap all my boyfriends lol so Mark is inspired by my cousin lol

what u think of hhr fight? and ron trying to help with all the "you know"s he used to describe things, hehe, and harry is finally getting closer and closer while hermione spats around that they're like siblings... mmmmm what u think?

the deal is still on, the next chapie is going to be intense once again, i promise that and a bit different, a lot of things are gonna be revealed so... you can only review as to have it sooner before your eyes

CP09


	6. Everything is Perfect

_HEEEY you guys, thank you so much for the reviews in the previous chapie, some people didn't like the previous chapie and i was worried about it, especially when some hard reviews arrived but when the rest of you showed all your love once again i realized that i can't satisfy everyone and that this is my story so i make what i want to make in order to satisfy most of us..._

thanks again for the support, you're so sweet

Enjoy...

_

* * *

Chapter Six – Everything is Perfect_

_July the 18__th__ 2002_

The past month had been Hell for Hermione Granger, pure, crazy Hell. After her fight with Harry, she had asked of Ginny and Mrs. Weasley to stay at the Burrow in Ginny's old bedroom while Harry and Ron with Lavender returned in the trio's flat. Hermione had been furious with Harry and his demands of her not to even consider the…favor to Seamus. The next day, when she had stopped fuming, she had returned in their flat and had found it full of her stuffs that previously were at Hogwarts, Harry had her boxes in his pockets and he had put everything back in place, leaving only the boxes with the things that belonged in her wardrobe for her to organize. That gesture of apology had warmed her heart and when he offered her a cup of tea, just like she likes it and he asked of her forgiveness out loud she could do nothing but forgive him.

After the apology, everything was supposed to be fine with them, yet Hermione couldn't remember a period of time that they were more tensed with each other, it felt difficult and unfamiliar since they were always in perfect terms. Having Ron missing all day long since he was getting ready with the National team for the Cup in August didn't help at all as uncomfortable silences, secret gazes and frowns were daily occurrences for the past four weeks.

Hermione hated to feel like that around Harry, the thought of her friendship with him being jeopardized for whatever reason made her heart skipped beats. She wasn't sure what this reason could be, she had some suspicions but she didn't dare to think more about it, in the past… maybe she would, but not anymore, not when she had decided to take some decisions in her life, it was enough and she wouldn't lose Harry as a friend just in the…hope for something more. The problem with secrets is even when you think you're in control, you're not, Hermione knew that, but she wasn't actually lying to Harry, or herself… she was mostly hiding the truth…

She had fought very hard to salvage her friendship with Ron after their failure as a couple, she wasn't even going to touch the same grounds with Harry, because she knew she could lose him forever and the mare thought made her heart bleed. She had survived without Ron before, but she had never separated from Harry…

Instead, she had decided that this uncomfortable _thing_ between them would sooner or later pass and she had no reason to worry about it, even if it was getting worse by every passing week. She wasn't even sure when it started, was it the night of the Ball, before that, or afterwards? She wasn't sure but she knew that it was already two and a half months ever since the ball and she hated to feel all this pressure on her. She had been under stress in the past but this was so different, it had nothing to do with the way she was feeling in her sixth year or even during the Hunt, no, this new problem could turn her from completely calm to furious and from comfortable to crazy jealous over the simplest of things.

That afternoon at the Burrow, a month ago, had made her question a lot of things, why Harry had acted so absurdly? Why he had been so aggressive about her personal life and why he had even asked her if she'd sleep with him. Yes, it was Harry, someone so close to her would care about her decisions but Hermione had seen a man… jealous in that afternoon. She hadn't touched the subject of that afternoon with him, she was afraid to hear the truth. She wouldn't ask herself why she had spat back at him things about his past dates or why she had been declaring their like-siblings status, she knew her reasons all too well…

Yet, she didn't dare to hope that he had gotten jealous, no, he was probably overprotecting, Ron hadn't been like that back in that afternoon but Ron had changed a lot, maybe that was the key, she saw things subjectively because of her own issues.

The month that followed that argument was full of Harry watching her, frowning, asking her where she was whenever she got inside the house, even when she would have announced that she'd go to her parents before she could leave at the first place. Hermione believed it was because she hadn't updated him on what she'd do about Seamus with whom she hadn't slept ultimately.

After much consideration she had decided not to do it, even if she wanted to help Seamus, when she thought of the thing asked of her, she realized that a one-night-stand cannot show to someone what he wants for the rest of his life. The big relief arrived when Hermione asked of Seamus to meet her so she could tell him about her decision and he too, had regretted asking her such a favor as he had decided to give a second chance to Edward and their relationship.

That was three weeks ago, yet Hermione hadn't told Harry anything, partly because she believed it wasn't his place to know, it was indeed her own life and body and partly because she hoped Harry would stop acting like that on his own without having her admitting that one of the reasons she declined the "favor" was because of Harry's intervention that evening at the Burrow.

The sound of the kettle snapped her out of her thoughts as she had woken up just a few minutes ago and she was in the kitchen making coffee for herself. Ron was gone once more at the Quidditch camp and Harry was at a mission in Wales for the past two days, the first thought in her mind when she had woken up about his wellbeing in the mission had brought the rest of the thoughts inside her mind. She took the kittle and poured the hot water inside the mug, where the coffee and the single spoon of sugar were waiting to get mixed with it. She needed a good dose of caffeine in her system as the house was finally silent for her to study.

'_Hermione_!'

Her head snapped at the direction of the sound in an instant, she would swear she heard Harry calling her name, the muffled sounds that followed put her to alert and she withdrew her wand from its holder under her gown, the place it always was since she was a healer at Hogwarts and an emergency could arrive at anytime. Hermione pointed her wand towards the door and moved slowly there, ready to hex the intruder.

'Harry?' she called out softly but right that moment the door of Harry's bedroom opened and a furious brunette burst out of it with an auror uniform in one of her hands, her face a mask of anger, the moment she saw Hermione, her anger turned into furry as she huffed again and stormed inside the bathroom, slamming the door behind her.

At first, Hermione was bewildered, there was a woman inside her flat, not _any_ woman, one of Harry's ex dates, the worst of them: Helena Young, that brunette witch who thought she knew everything, moved from France to the auror training and ever since under Hermione's skin. Hermione had no idea why this woman was inside her house again, wearing one of Harry's Puddlemere United t-shirts that _Hermione_ had bought for him. The moment Harry followed, bursting out of his bedroom just in a pair of boxers, Hermione felt both embarrassed to see him like that and furious at what was happening there.

The moment Harry saw Hermione, his face turned from blushed that it was already into true red as he tried to hide himself and held her eyes a moment longer with his own. Hermione didn't know what to say, she wasn't sure she wanted to say anything so she just huffed and glared at him while he rushed back to his bedroom and returned in a pair of trousers and his auror shirt that was probably taken off just a few hours ago… the thought made Hermione's blood reach the boiling point.

His luck was over, he was certain of that, after a crazy month of feeling uncomfortable around Hermione, of feeling like strangling Seamus Finnegan even if Harry didn't know what had happened between, there was no chest monster this time, only a scalding uncomfortable feeling that almost choked him. After a month of sleeping and having dreams of a half-naked brunette dancing around a seduced Seamus, then around Ron, then Krum and then himself, always waking up right before the moment he would see her face, Harry had decided to try his luck and move out of the loop he had thrown himself in. Helena, a girl he knew from training and had proved herself half decent was with him in the mission in Wales that ended way sooner than expected and Harry had hoped he could prove to himself that everything was normal in his life, the adrenaline of the mission had been proven enough for him to take the decision.

After the awful night of him or actually a part of his _anatomy_ not functioning… embarrassing him to no end, Harry and Helena had fallen asleep, the dream had returned, the brunette was touching him while he sat on a chair, caressing his hair, touching his forehead, hugging him, taking his hand in hers while she allowed him to feel her body close to his.

He hadn't needed a lot more to wake up and want another try with Helena and the poor unsatisfied witch was more than willing to help. Everything was going fine and Harry was so happy to show to the entire universe and himself that everything was back to normal… until he screamed out the wrong name during his climax as he had shut his eyes and the face of a _very_ familiar brunette had flashed before them.

'_HERMIONE!'_

He had shouted the name so loudly that he broken the silencing charm he had cast upon his bedroom ever since Ron and Lavender had started dating. The following moments were Helena freezing beneath him, raising her well trained-to-cause-pain hand and slapping him across the face hard enough to make him see flying broomsticks and then she had stood up, used a t-shirt of his own that she found, gripped her clothes and stormed out of the bedroom as she muttered profanities all the way to the bathroom.

He wanted to explain, to excuse himself but didn't know how to do either of these things so he had just lamely put his boxers on and tried to follow her, completely forgetting that Hermione was at the flat as he had returned late at night. Now as Harry met the glare of Hermione Granger's the mare thought of her having actually heard her name being called by him made his guts twist and turn, some work not to destroy their friendship.

She wasn't sure what to do as they both looked at each other's eyes in silence, she could see his embarrassment, she could notice half of his face being redder than the other half with the red part slowly taking a palm's shape. She could see it all but she could also feel her own emotions and thoughts. He had been the one preaching about her and Seamus and he had brought one of his exes back home, he was so selfish! And arrogant! That was it, her emotional status was set to furious! He had no right screaming at her and dragging her like he had done a month ago when now; he was fucking around _literally_ with Helena freaking Young!

She finally moved away from the doorframe of the kitchen, she wished she could go to her own bedroom but she would have to pass by him and the mare thought of smelling that witch on him made her guts turn. She decided to move back inside the kitchen the moment Helena was storming out of the bathroom fully clothed, glared at him once again and then threw a deathly glare at Hermione too before she could apparate out of the apartment, the wards allowing her since she had gotten in with Harry.

Hermione tried to avoid the woman's glare, she didn't even know what happened to have them acting like that, all she knew was that she thought she heard her name and then she heard the sounds from the bedroom and Helena running out and Harry in his boxers, these black, tight boxers that made great contrast with his pale skin and toned muscles, Auror training and Quidditch had done him good.

'_Holy Cricket! You're supposed to be furious at him!' _Her mind screamed and Hermione always heard that specific organ of hers that she was so famous about…

The moment Harry saw Helena disappearing, knowing he would sooner or later face her at the ministry where they both worked and Hermione moved back in the kitchen, he closed his eyes in defeat. A few minutes ago, when he was waking up from that great dream, he thought the day would be different, now he had a mad ex meaningless-one-night-stand to talk to and a best friend-_sister_-nemesis to face, the thought of the second said person having heard him calling her name just made him want to throw up even more than the thought of her being his supposed sister.

He walked slowly inside the kitchen, deciding to play cool if not dumb in hope of not having the situation out of control. Hermione's angry eyes warned him otherwise but right now his mind was blank of some kind of plan of how to approach the whole thing.

'Uhm… Good morning…' He finally said and mentally kicked himself, great work, she had frowned and that line between her delicate brows that he didn't like was back in all its glory.

'_Was_… up until I thought someone got inside the house and saw Young running out of your bedroom.' Hermione said curtly and Harry would swear she sounded jealous, just like he had been in that heated argument out of the Burrow.

'I should have informed you about my early return,' Harry said softly, hoping this approach was better than the dumb "Good Morning"…

'You _should have_ but I guess you were busy…' she said sarcastically and Harry sighed, he could see she wasn't going to take it easy, he wasn't sure why but he tried not to think about it too much.

'I woke up worrying over your safety, not knowing you were actually back, this was your first out-of-the-ministry mission and you couldn't say a word!' Hermione exclaimed and above the jealousy and the uncomfortable feeling of knowing what he had been doing while she was making her coffee, she was angry with him for not saying a word of his return. She was always worried about him when he was away.

'But no, there was no reason to inform poor Hermione because we had other things in our mind, right?' Hermione added even without wanting to as the suffocating feelings took over after so many weeks of tension. Harry huffed in exasperation and shook his head before he could reply.

'Oh what about poor Harry? Why should we tell him _anything_, right?' he retorted in a shout that worked her up even more.

'Oh no, don't turn that on me now, I have hidden nothing from you!' Hermione spat back and Harry snorted, as if he indeed knew that some things had been hidden.

'Yeah right _nothing_; I know what you've been doing for the past month so there's no need for you to tell me anything! RIGHT?' he hollered back and Hermione looked at him bewildered for a moment, was that about Seamus again?

'Is this about the infamous favor?' she asked and Harry looked at her furious.

'Maybe it is!' he screamed again and Hermione this time chuckled ironically, knowing exactly how to infuriate him even more.

'Whatever I did or did not with Seamus…It's none of your business!' she shouted back this time, Harry shut his eyes in an effort not to explode as the truth was thrown in his face.

'And it's none of _your_ business what I do with Helena or whoever I want!' Harry shouted back finally, not knowing how else to get back to her, when he opened his eyes Hermione had moved closer to him, both of them were fuming.

'IT IS when your safety is involved, you should have thought of me and how worried I am when you're away!' Hermione shouted once more, not even sure how they made it to be screaming at each other's face at 09.15 am in a Saturday.

'AND YOU SHOULD HAVE THOUGHT OF ME AND MY ADVICE INSTEAD OF GOING AND DOING IT WITH FINEGAN!' Harry screamed back louder than before, Hermione didn't back down, like always, she was the only one not to get afraid of his voice's volume.

'YOU HAVE TAKEN THIS AS A FACT ALREADY! I _DID_ THINK OF WHAT YOU SAID! I **DIDN'T** SLEEP WITH SEAMUS! BUT YOU **DID** IT WITH HER!' Hermione screamed back at the same volume, since her voice was feminine and higher than his her words were out more in wails than in shouts, nonetheless they were loud.

'You slept with her…again.' she said, this time much lower, in almost a broken voice as the realization sunk in. Both of them remained silent after that outburst, looking at each other deeply as either of them knew what to say, their chests still rising and falling in pants.

Usually, these two wouldn't fight, or if they did, they would for good reasons, never something small or unimportant like Hermione always fought with Ron. As they stood there, half a foot away from each other, still panting and looking wild at each other, they both knew this wasn't small or unimportant, this was big, major and they both did a miserable try to fight so far.

They were both afraid, they could see that in each other's eyes, they weren't stupid; they knew something was changing, again, and they were afraid of that chance, of what it would bring with it. They were both people of the facts and the instincts and for months now the facts and their instincts were screaming about the upcoming chance, a chance that could either unite them even more, ultimately or tear them apart completely, because they knew, a friendship so deep as their own, if hurt by a fallen affair of the two, it'd be never completely repaired again and they couldn't risk that, they were too afraid to do such thing.

'I – I… did but it wasn't- it was nothing and I-' he wasn't even sure of he would say, he didn't participate body and soul? He "invited" someone else, her? He didn't know what to say exactly, he just knew that he wanted to show her it meant nothing; he couldn't stand looking at her eyes that now looked sadder than anything else. The outburst they had moments ago showed him things were getting serious, that she cared but right now, as she looked at him sad and _hurt_, he felt like she was slipping through his fingers.

He hadn't even though of how after so much tension and effort to fight the things he was feeling over the past weeks her name slipped from his lips so easily upon the moment of ultimate pleasure, as if its body knew better. It was still so early in the morning and he was in a major fight with Hermione, the person he hated fighting with the most, not only because he didn't want to hurt or disappoint her, but also because she was as powerful as he was, they knew each other so well that if against each other, there was just no winner.

'I don't want to know,' she finally interrupted him, she didn't want to hear anything from the things he probably had to say, they had just stopped screaming at each other and she was feeling already spent and exhausted, it was enough, she didn't want to know the details, she knew the main fact and that was enough: he had slept with Helena. When he had been on his own for months, she didn't want to know if it would be something more than a one-night-stand that was the first time too, she feared to hear that it was the start of something, even at a rocky star as Helena had just stormed out of the house. Hermione just didn't want to know about what he was going to do.

She didn't even want to touch the subject of having heard him screaming her name or not, maybe it was a trick of her mind, it was early in the morning after all, maybe it was another excuse of her mind to refuse the truth, thing was, she wasn't going to jeopardize more standard things in her life. She was going to move on, no matter what…

'HEY GUYS!' Ron's voice was heard and both Harry and Hermione looked at the kitchen's door, where Ron had probably just flooed back or apparated, in their haste, they had heard nothing; a muggle chopper could have thrown him from the roof for all they knew.

'I finally have my day off! Isn't that awesome?' Ron asked with a huge beam as he put down his kit-bags with the national symbol on, the lion and looked back at his friends who simply looked sleepy, exhausted, wild, sad, angry, tensed and all these things at the same time…

'Yeah it's awesome,' Hermione finally answered as she moved away from Harry, opening the half-a-foot distance they had, before Harry could nod his head almost lifelessly too.

'Yeah, welcome back mate,' Harry said in a slow voice as Ron was still looking at them with the beam on his face freezing by the passing moments.

Hermione was the first to move close to the kitchen door; Ron opened his arms, thinking she was going to hug him in welcome but Hermione patted his shoulder and passed by his left as her eyes filled with tears before she could rush to her bedroom and lock the door.

Ron was probably still too confused to detect if the tears were of happiness to see him or something else but he smiled and opened his arms for a manly hug for Harry who too, moved close to the kitchen's door with his head lowered. Harry too, patted Ron on the other shoulder and passed by him from his right side.

'Mate, what's wrong?' Ron asked as Harry was already moving away.

'Nothing's wrong, everything is perfect…' Harry said in that tired voice before he could mutter something about going back to his bed for awhile to think and that there was food on the fridge for the redhead.

Ron left his arms fall lifelessly on his body as he watched Harry disappearing in his own bedroom before the door could be closed. Ron had probably a lot of questions in his head, like why half of Harry's face was red and the shape of a palm could be seen, or why Hermione had looked like that, or why the magic in the kitchen was crackling in high levels, or even why both of them looked like someone had died.

'Perfect my ass…' the redhead muttered halfheartedly as he tried to listen to any other noise of the flat and only silence greeted his ears…

* * *

SOOOO? i know... so much tension and harry tried like every male to get over his feelings with sexual means but... it didn't work, and poor ron returned to find them like that... and poor hermione, this was finally the first chapie from her pov as well and i really enjoyed writing about her, what u think of the chapie guys? was it nice? we had a fight a brunette one night stand who's also a know it all... and hermione furious and poor harry got slapped so hard that he saw flying broomsticks loool i just couldn't resist... : P

waiting for your reviews... the next chapie will be... explosive : P the deal is on once again, reviews=updates

thanks for reading

CP09


	7. Dumb Krum

_Hello everyone! of course it's 02.50 and of course i absolutely LOVE YOU for all this amazing support you show me, i am just so glad you like my work and i feel motivated with every review i receive, thank you so much._

just one thing about two people who like to bash me for crazy reasons through the system of reviewing as not-signed up members: _HHR Shipper_: i thought i lost you as a reader as you declared in chapter 6 yourself so i don't understand why u still bother...

and at _He-Who-Has-No-Name_ who "wished" for me to burn in Hell because i use ' and not " while quoting, 3 things: 1st, this way of quoting is in my DH copy, 2nd i'm a pagan so i don't really believe in Hell and Heaven (sorry, mate, for me this is like wishing to go to Wonderland, sounds interesting but a bit impossible for my believes) 3rd do they really accept people in Hell for using ' and not " in fanfiction? that's why Hell's so full?

you can both keep reviewing as anonymous members and i'll keep deleting your rubbish or you can get the guts, review as true members so i can block and report you for bashing and cursing so we can get done with each other, it's called Life get one... this is the first and last time i waste my time on you so it's on you now, either keep up to nowhere with this or get a life

i always accepted bad criticism, it made me develop as an author but i have no interest in pointless bashing... i make stories for years now and i can only try and satisfy most of my readers, i make stories with my rules and i can only hope that they will be loved by most of you, i take nothing but satisfaction in return, no money and no "fame", so having random people bashing of something i love is just unacceptable

for the rest of my wonderful supporters and reviewers...

Enjoy... this is dedicated to you!

_

* * *

Chapter Seven – Dumb Krum_

_July the 6__th __2002_

They were going to have fun, a lot of fun. It was supposed to be Quidditch, he liked Quidditch, he wouldn't allow a crazy, uncomfortable, bloody…situation between him and the main female figure in his life to ruin this friendly match before the Finals of the World Cup. The entire nation was excited about England going to the finals of the World Cup ever since Voldemort's fall and Ron was the King once again; Harry Potter was going to enjoy himself like the rest of the English people.

These were his thoughts as he moved up the small hill that separated him, Hermione, Lavender and the rest of the Weasleys from the valley they were supposed to camp for the night as later that evening, England was going to have a friendly match with Bulgaria right before their actual recount during the Cup. Camping wasn't Harry's best activity, he had enough for a lifetime during the Hunt, but since he was supposed to be supportive of Ron's career and he wanted to watch the match, he had to be in a tent again.

Ron was already with the team for the past two days, not needing distraction as to focus, Lavender and Ron would stay at the same tent with himself and Hermione that were both there with no companions and the rest of the Weasleys would be in their own new tent. Lavender would spend time with the girly and pregnant Fleur so Harry had another reason to feel uncomfortable by hanging around Hermione up until the match would be on.

If someone had told him that he would be feeling uncomfortable before Hermione, he would have called them barking mad but the past days, ever since the incident with Helena, Harry and Hermione had almost stopped any kind of conversation, only speaking when necessary while the heavy silences would hang over their heads most of the time. They had made sure to see each other in a minimum, Hermione spending a lot of time in the Burrow, where Fleur would force the ladies of the family to do pregnancy exercises and Harry did his best to work long hours in the ministry. They were both uncomfortable and they knew that, they couldn't deny it anymore, something was really off and it had to be restored.

Harry had cleared things up with Helena, if there was anything to clean up there, she had told him that he didn't need to apologize or say anything, just to decide… Harry was afraid to accept what she meant, but he knew that calling Hermione's name during his climax wasn't the most platonic thing to do with the woman that was supposed to be his sister…

Hermione on her part had kept her thoughts, words and frowns in a minimum as Harry saw it, she hadn't asked anything about Helena, just like she had said back then in their row, she didn't want to know so Harry hadn't found the chance to tell her that nothing was going on with his colleague, he wanted to explain, somehow to excuse himself, to _apologize_ as he remembered her sad eyes that early morning, yet she hadn't given him the chance ever since and for some reason he felt like opening another bleeding wound if he even tried.

'I think this is our spot,' the voice of the woman in his thoughts spoke and pulled him out of them. Hermione was pointing at two large spots for the Weasleys' tent and their own. Lavender squealed between the sobered Harry and Hermione and the two, like they had done so many times in the past, during the Hunt, started setting up the tent, it wasn't the same they had back then, the one smelling of cats, this was a new one, a larger one, yet the odd feeling of doing something you grew to dislike to, was evident inside them.

In mare minutes the tent was set and the two almost hesitated to get, thing ridiculous since it was just for a night and just as to sleep somewhere after the fun that was yet to come… having no comfort from each other because of the whole situation between them made both feel even more odd.

The two entered the tent and Harry moved close to his bedroom, in instinct, as he had nothing to discuss with Lavender who was already changing the numerous accessories of hers to new ones to match England's colours and he felt uncomfortable before Hermione too who just started testing some spots on the tent, as if they were back in the Hunt, old habits die hard.

'I'm going to check on Fleur, I'll signal for you when we're to start for the stadium,' Lavender announced and the two nodded soberly, Harry from the revealed spot of his bedroom and Hermione from the sofa that she was sat after being done checking around. When the two remained alone Harry looked at Hermione through the opened door, she was just sitting there, looking at her hands, thinking, he was sure, of what, he was afraid to guess. He didn't know how to approach the whole deal, he didn't know how to do it, he had been in difficult periods of time with other people, _all_ the other people, but not with her, ever and now he suddenly didn't how to talk to a person so close to him that felt as if a part of himself.

He was stuck, staring at her the moment she moved her head and looked at his direction, their eyes met and even if he was taken by surprise and looked away she had seen him staring. She stood up slowly, moved inside his bedroom and sat at the bed he had laid on.

'Can we talk?' she asked quietly, her voice calmed and normal for the first time in days while addressing him.

'Sure,' Harry only said in a small voice as well.

'I don't like this,' Hermione started and Harry waited for her to elaborate. 'I… I just want us to be back to normal, I know this is not normal and I am not even sure when it started changing, I don't know why or how and that confuses me greatly but I want my best friend back, can I have him?' Hermione said in a breath and ended her words with a question.

By the moment her words had been heard, Harry's heart had melted little by little, taking with it all the feelings of being uneasy and worried and odd around her. She was his best friend, above all the fears and the changes and the odd feelings, Hermione Granger was his corner-stone, proven for years now, she was his best friend above and before anything else so he knew they at least needed to keep that intact, even if all this confusion had been created in the desperate try to keep things like before, falling miserably all the way, they were best friends and he couldn't stand another minute without her friendship.

Instead of answering immediately with words, he sat up on the bed and hugged her tightly the best he could.

'You always have me, Hermione,' Harry whispered close to her ear and he smile slightly just how right and warm her arms around him felt as she hugged him back. That was until she simply breathed close to his ear as their heads were close to each other's and her hot breath sent shivers down his spine as her delicate body was pressed against his toned one by the waist up.

"_Darn it Potter! You're supposed to be salvaging the most important relationship you have here…"_ A part of his mind screamed as his body enjoyed the feel of her form against his own.

'Thank you,' she only whispered and Harry nodded, ending the hug and the inner battle inside him.

'No problem.' he said with a small grin as she smiled, achieving for him to forget the things in his mind just with her smiling lips, that looked so beautiful and full and…

'So we should get ready, scarves and flags and stuff for the King,' Hermione added after a moment, taking his mind away from those thoughts too. Harry nodded dumbly and then saw Hermione leaving his room and going in her own to take the things they needed for the match that was to take place as they were invited – as war Heroes and friends of the Keeper War Hero of the team- in the VIP section of the stadium.

After a few minutes Harry was moving out of his bedroom in a white t-shirt with a lion on while Hermione showed up with a t-shirt with a stamp of a waving English flag on it. They both smiled, took their scarves with the English colours and at that moment, Lavender was heard calling them. They both moved out of the tent, secured it and started moving behind all the Weasleys and the mascot of the team, Lavender who was just wearing everything England related…

'Harry! Hermione!' ROAR!'

The sounds of the light voice calling them and the roaring of a lion made both friends beam and turn around to see none else but Luna Lovegood rushing close to them with that old Gryffindor lion on her head.

'Luna!' Hermione called back first as the blond girl hugged her tightly, Hermione's face disappearing in the lion's mane before Luna could hug Harry too with a huge smile on her face as she looked at the two friends.

'We should be going, Lav and the rest have already moved,' Hermione said and the trio nodded and started moving again, Harry and Hermione before Luna with her lion head roaring all the time. They moved inside a small forest that separated the valley from the well hidden stadium and Hermione, like she always did ever since a girl, took Harry's hand in hers as they kept moving, making sure they won't stubble on roots and rotten leaves. Harry smiled even if he didn't turn his head to look at her as he felt her delicate palm in his larger one.

They reached the stadium, the biggest ever made in Europe, one of the symbols of the Post-Wizarding War England that the Ministry had tried to entitle the Harry Potter stadium, after Harry had freaked out, they had called it "The Savor's Stadium", still awful in his opinion but sometimes you can't win an argument with politics.

They found the gate that led to the VIP section of the place and Luna with Draco followed as they had their own VIP tickets for the match, the four people found the rest of the Weasleys and after some tensed stares and glares Harry and Hermione sat between the Weasleys and Luna.

Many people got inside the VIP section, shaking hands with Harry and Hermione and the Weasleys, people from the ministry of Britain and Ireland, people from the Holland and the rest of the "neighbors" and a lot of people from the Bulgarian ministry along some celebrities of the Wizarding World from both countries, one of them had Hermione smiling widely and hugging him tightly.

'So long time and no see,' Victor Krum said as he hugged his old friend tightly with his massive body enveloping Hermione, his English improved. Harry stood up from his chair as to shake hands with the man when he'd release Hermione, all the while Harry trying to beat down the uncomfortable feeling that rose up to his heart at the sight of a man hugging Hermione, a man that once interrogated him about his status with Hermione back in 1994…

'Harry Potter,' Victor finally said as he released Hermione yet held an arm around her shoulders as he offered his hand to Harry who took it and shook it firmly.

'Victor,' Harry greeted finally with a tight expression. The Bulgarian looked between Harry and Hermione and then smiled at her.

'I'm so glad to see you again, I've missed you,' he said with his deep voice and Hermione blushed and smiled.

'It's so good to see you too, Victor, I'm sure we'll enjoy the match,' Hermione replied and the older man smiled. Victor Krum had stopped his Quidditch career shortly after an injury he had in a Balkan tournament in 1999 so now he was there as a simple fan of his team. His arranged seat was on the row above theirs and right behind Harry and Hermione's seats so he could chat with them, or Hermione to be exact as he looked great interest, like he always did.

Soon the Minister of Magic, Jasper Norton, was starting the match by releasing the Snitch and everyone started cheering as the old good song of the Gryffindors started among the national anthem and other Quidditch songs:

_Weasley is our King,_

_Weasley is our King,_

_He didn't let the Quaffle in_

_Weasley is our King._

_Weasley can save anything,_

_He never leaves a single ring,_

_That's why Brits all sing:_

_Weasley is our King. _

The "Gryffindors" had been replaced with "Brits" to match every fan of the team as Ron had indeed become very famous as the Keeper of the team. Both Harry and Hermione smiled and started singing too as the overexcited Lavender was practically hollering the song from her seat, making sure everyone saw or actually heard her supporting her boyfriend, Ginny who was next to her was frowned with one finger blocking her ear from being destroyed because of the older Gryffindor's loud voice.

'So what's new with you, Hermione?' Victor asked a few minutes later, as the match had gotten into a steady rhythm with England achieving a difference of 30 points from Bulgaria. Hermione took her eyes from the match right after one of Ron's first saves in the match that was greeted with clapping from the people and turned to look at him. Harry kept his eyes on the match but his ears were focused on Hermione and Krum.

'The things you know from my letters, at Hogwarts once again, as a healer this time and quite enjoying it, what about you?' Hermione said and Krum replied.

'Well, enjoying my life around Europe, thinking of applying as the coach of the Bulgarian team, Quidditch is like a germ, once inside your blood, it can't be gone easily,' Krum said and Harry had to nod mentally and agree with him. 'Being single… looking for the perfect match even in the coldest parts of Europe like here… in England… never forgetting where I met one of the prettiest women…' Harry's stomach dropped at these words and he fought with all his power not to snap his head at Krum's direction, he was sure Hermione had blushed and he did his best not to turn around and punch Krum in the face as the world press was just a couple of rows from theirs.

Krum was supposed to belong in the past, being just friends with Hermione, it had been so many years, eight to be exact, it was enough of him chasing Hermione, she didn't want him, or did she? In his sudden internal outburst he hadn't heard her speaking yet.

'Oh Victor, thanks,' Hermione finally said quietly from his left and Harry greeted his teeth in annoyance as his stomach felt uneasy, just a while ago he was agreeing with Hermione that they could act like best friends around each other but right now he wanted to take her away from the poisonous flirting of the Bulgarian, he had no right keeping up from where he had stopped in 1994!

Before any of the three could realize what or how it happened, the English seeker had caught the Snitch and the English team won just after a few minutes of that friendly match with a decent and happy score of 190-000 with Ron having more than five successful saves. The match was done even before it could start and everyone started exiting the stadium, the people of the VIP section moved through a tunnel that led them to the room for the after-match party that would be held. Harry was moving among the Weasleys as Krum had taken Hermione by the shoulders and there moving before her. Luna appeared on his side with the lion now in her hands.

'Are you alright with Hermione being around Krum?' the blond girl asked and Harry looked down at her, he was angry, he knew he didn't like men around Hermione by now and if it was anyone else asking he would have lied but before Luna's always honest eyes, he couldn't do it.

'I don't know,' he finally admitted and Luna smiled slightly with her dreamy eyes.

'Are you just being difficult like men do when they're asked of their feelings or you really don't know?' Luna asked, getting straight to the point as Harry returned his gaze on Hermione and Krum who seemed to want to get closer and closer to her, flaring up Harry's torrent of emotion.

'I don't know…' He repeated honestly, he wasn't supposed to be feeling like this, why did he, then? He had agreed just while before they were going to be fine with each other, with their friendship, yet the place of chest monsters and stomach butterflies had been filled with a scalding feeling of being uncomfortable, jealous and possessive of the woman who was supposed to be his sister, yet he had called her name during sex with another woman and his sleep had been hunted by a brunette that he didn't dare admit it was her.

The guests moved inside the room that was properly decorated for the party and while Hermione ordered for a butterbeer Harry went straight to elf wine with the plan of changing to firewhiskey later on. The Weasleys were talking among each other, Luna with Lavender and everyone and Krum had seemed to monopolizing Hermione's interest as he kept telling her things that made her smile or laugh or playfully slap his arm, yet she was keeping a distance that she fought to have as Victor made sure to somehow be touching her all the time, sending Harry's blood to the boiling point.

Soon, the English and the Bulgarian teams were entering the room, with Lavender flanging herself in Ron's arms who hugged and kissed her before everyone, having the press taking pictures of the most famous couple in the Wizarding world, as Ron Weasley the hunk, the perfect catch, was just perfect with his biggest fan….

Everyone was clapping for the teams that moved inside and Ron approached his family and friends by Lavender's side, he smiled at everyone, having Hermione hugging and congratulating, Ginny and Fleur doing the same before the boys could take care of him with pats and playful punches, Harry did his best to take his eyes away from Krum who just waited for the exchanges to end so he could have Hermione close again.

'Victor Krum,' Ron finally greeted and shook hands with the Bulgarian and the older man shook hands with Ron.

'Well done with the game,' Victor praised and Ron's ears turned pink. Harry felt like exploding, he knew Ron was a fan of the man, he still remembered his obsession with him up until the Yule Ball, now he was a fan again and Harry hated the fact that both Ron and Hermione were charmed by Krum again, maybe that was it, that's why he was so upset, Krum was taking away his best friends…

Not even Harry could buy his own excuses.

Ron smiled and thanked Krum with a beam before he could order for a drink, still with Lavender by his side and moved close to Harry who was watching Hermione. Ron approached Harry with a butterbeer in his hand as Harry was finishing his first glass of elf wine and was waving for a glass of firewhiskey. Ron looked at him surprised.

'You're gonna be tipsy? Likewise!' Ron said with a laugh that was answered by Harry's sober nod.

'Yeah, because I'm _so_ happy!' he almost spat as he couldn't take his eyes off Hermione's back who looked at him for a moment as if she could feel his stare on her skin.

Harry tried to place his feelings, why now, why like that, why he felt like this when Hermione was just talking with an old friend of hers? Was it because this friend had shown interest for her in a different way when Harry was still trying to learn how to cast the summoning charm? Krum had noticed a side of Hermione, a _beautiful_ side of Hermione when Harry had simply dropped his jaw at her beauty in the Yule Ball, was that it? Harry was feeling stupid for not seeing a flower blossoming in his own garden?

The party was soon ending, Harry not even realizing when it was done and the people were leaving, or when he had consumed two more glasses of firewhiskey, the evening seemed to be moving in fast forward and Harry only hoped the end of it wouldn't be explosive. Krum took Hermione's hand, kissed the back of her palm and then leaned and gave her a kiss on the cheek, making her blush and smile before she could say her good night, not answering the kiss, yet giving him a warm smile. Harry huffed and started for the exit as Hermione followed him and the Weasleys back to the camp.

Ron wasn't tipsy anymore, he was _toasted_, supported by Lavender and Ginny before Harry moved close and helped, George, Bill and even Arthur seemed tipsy so Harry would take care of Ron who was in the worst state as to distract himself, he wished he had gotten drunk too, like that he would have finally tore his eyes from Hermione all night. Luna said her goodnight promising she'd seen them soon.

'I am your KING!' Ron was shouting in their way back and a lot of people in the camp cheered for him, equally drunken as they were still celebrating for the promising victory of the team.

'You are, just don't shout in my ear!' Harry told Ron who actually giggled and winked at him.

'You're angry with someone else, don't vent on me!' he called out loud enough for everyone to look at Harry in wonder, Hermione included and Harry himself looked away.

'Shut up, you're drunk,' Harry finally said and Ron snorted and burped.

'No I'm not drunk… if I was I would be… yeah ok, maybe I am drunk. Nor you or Lavender have twin siblings holding me, right?' Ron asked as they finally got in the path that led to the tent. 'Because mate, if you have a twin brother and all these years you're being lying to me and Mione about you being alone in the world, I will be _really_ pissed!' Ron said drunkenly and Harry huffed.

'You _are_ pissed!' Harry retorted and Ron giggled once again and gave a smacking kiss on Harry's cheek.

Harry, Lavender, Ron and Hermione finally gotten inside their tent and Lavender helped Ron on the bed as the redhead took her with him as he fell with a groan, they both giggled as Harry huffed again and again, now with Hermione close by, looking at the two, both amused and slightly disgusted, he decided to vent.

'Seems like everyone had a _great_ time tonight…' Harry commented bitterly and Hermione's amused face changed into one of wonder.

'It was nice…' she pointed out slowly, not sure how to respond.

'With good old Victor… he seemed _mesmerized_ by you,' Harry spat, not leaving space for doubt of his mood, Hermione this time frowned.

'He's always kind,' she tried and Harry snorted finally and rolled his eyes.

'Oh yes, SO kind… we hardly had a word with you as he made sure to keep talking to you for over three bloody hours!' Harry almost shouted, finding an excuse to add in his accusing tone at the last moment. Hermione was looking at him shocked.

'What's wrong with you? I thought we settled this,' Hermione finally shouted back, Harry found the perfect excuse to keep up with his outburst.

'We were supposed to be spending some time all together like before but you decided to forget about everyone and keep all night long with your precious Krum!' Harry shouted and Ron giggled.

'Dumb Krum!' he called out before the semi-drunk Lavender could shush him with a finger on the lips. Hermione huffed and shook her head.

'I was right there while you stood five feet away, all glaring and staring, not the most _welcoming_ of postures for someone who wants to spend time with others!' Hermione called out and Harry felt surprised that she had noticed that she had looked for him even if Krum had done his best to keep her interest on him.

'I wasn't all glaring and staring! I was just watching over you! He has been hitting on you ever since you were fourteen and he was an adult already!' Harry finally screamed back, not sure what else to say as she was right about him being unapproachable all night. Hermione huffed.

'I was fifteen and he was seventeen! For the love of Morgana, Harry! What is this all about?' Hermione screamed her response.

'She was mate! She's born in 1979! Mione is the eldest of us!' Ron called out and then started laughing as if this was funny, both Hermione and Harry rolled their eyes at their best friend who tried to stop laughing. 'She was sixteen at her fifth year, seventeen at her sixth year and eighteen at her seventh, no, wait, we didn't go there, we were at the hunt, oh nice times…. When I tried to kill you, Harry, or when she was at Hogwarts in the battle-'

'Shut up, Ronald!' Hermione screamed this time and the redhead actually obeyed and looked at Hermione with drunken, yet firm eyes for a moment; he then looked at Harry and then back at her.

'You shouldn't be camping, it's not good for you, you're _never_ fine when you're in a tent, first the death eaters attack back in 1994, then the Hunt, now this…. ts ts ts.' Ron added and Harry and Hermione focused on each other again, their eyes getting wild once more.

'Point is, Krum's older than you and he's been hitting on you ever since you were a teenager, you can do much better than him!' Harry screamed again, resuming his fight with her as she huffed, for a moment he remembered Hermione telling he could make much better than believing Luna, all these years ago.

'Oh why don't you go back to your precious Helena and leave us be?' Hermione screamed back and Harry glared at her.

'There's nothing on with Helena, I've told you that day, it was nothing! But THIS, with you and Krum… you have to stop it, it's been eight bloody years!' Harry screamed, not the best way of telling her that nothing was on with Helena as he wanted but at least he told her.

'Oh really? And who are you to tell me what to do?' Hermione provoked him and Harry opened his mouth to reply her question in the same fierce tone.

Silence.

He wasn't sure of who he was to her anymore, her brother? It sounded odd and wrong and mediocre. Her best friend, it sounded good, a good excuse for him to keep acting like that, yet it wasn't _enough_, so who was he to her to act like that? To bring her to the point of screaming and feeling bad when he was supposed to be supportive of her choices?

'I – I am-! I –' he stammered for a moment before he could finally storm out of the tent, leaving her standing there with a giggling Ron and a tipsy Lavender. He felt as if his feet were moving on their own accord, taking him away from realization as he looked at her eyes even if his brain screamed for him to stay where he was, to finally face facts.

He rushed out of the tent, away from the path that led to it, away from the forest and back to the hill on which they had portkeyed before. The valley was full of people that celebrated but right now he felt like screaming in agony and killing something. He didn't want to encounter any drunken English fan as he didn't need much to explode on the wrong person.

He huffed and mentally cursed, kicked the ground as his temper remained hot and crazed until he started panting while he climbed up the hill, finally using his energy there, as he kept moving higher and higher he felt the fresh July air hitting his face, slightly relaxing him as he finally took a deep breath and flopped down on the ground as he looked down at the valley, even from there, he could spot the tent that Hermione and the rest were in.

He finally felt guilty, for leaving her there, even as to take some fresh air, he had done –in a smaller scale- what Ron had done during the hunt, left her behind, even for an hour or so as he planned to stay there and cool off.

He wanted to find a reason for him acting like that, for creating all this confusion, because it all started from him, when his stomach had dropped at the news of her having an admirer, even when it was a twelve year old, or when he had felt so comfortable just in her presence like always, or when he had rushed right after his training to bury her cat, or when he spilled truths that hadn't been revealed that drunken night, over two months ago in her parents' house, and ever since, the word sister addressed on Hermione sounded weird.

He had given a detailed description of what falling in love was, to his four year old Godson and all the things he had said had been practiced by him on Hermione. He had gotten furious about the Finnegan favor and he had faced and equally mad Hermione in the Helena thing. He had been so odd with her, and now he had vented once again, bursting at her for spending a few hours with Krum when he had her for _days_ and _weeks_ and he had tried to avoid her.

Her, the person closest to him, the girl that taught him how to love, the girl that always stood proud and unmoving when he would scream his head off, the girl that first kissed and hugged him, before he even thought of kissing and hugging people, deprived of love from the Dursleys ever since he was a baby.

The woman who fought by his side and even under the Cruciatus, didn't betray him, the person who was always there, when none else was, the person for whom he had even blocked Voldemort from his mind as to think straight and save her, the person for whom his heart had almost stopped beating in terror when she had fallen in the Department of Mysteries.

The girl that had talked to him about bravery and friendship and…more important things…

He knew what these things were, love, it was love, the one emotion he was supposed to posses like none else, the one emotion she had been showing him selflessly ever since she was a little girl, the same emotion she showed him when she was a young woman who even sent her parents in the other side of the world for him.

He knew about love, and he finally had to admit, he had been showing different faces of love over the years to her, the one of the friend's who fights with a troll to save her, the one of the best friend's who tries to be an active member of S.P.E.W. even if he knows it's hopeless as not to upset her, the one of the brother that would comfort her, and now he finally had to admit that his love for her was changing its face once again, was evolving, moving to a new level. He was showing the love of a lover, of a jealous, overprotective and possessive lover who wanted her, needed her like always and even more.

Harry gasped both in defeat and exhaustion as the realization washed over him like a bucket of cold water, awakening him and turning him completely numb at the same time.

He was in love with Hermione!

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OOOH such a full chapter! and YES YES YES Hallelujah! he accepted it! he's in love with Hermione! (duuh) what u think guys? we had so many things here, Victor back and trying, harry furious once more, ron toasted and funny ( i just adore him like that) and the always honest LUNA was in the chapie, i know, just for a bit but we'll see more of her if you want to : ) and of course poor hermione who wanted to try and be back to normal

what u think is going to happen now? one down but the other will go? he's gonna tell her? straight away or not?

the deal is on, you review, i update and hhr keep up!

your reviews are my motivation :)

thanks for reading

CP09


	8. Chased Away

_Hello guys! Here's the new chapter! Thank you so much for the reviews, i'm so glad you like my work :)tomorrow my college starts again for the 2nd semester and i'm just so freaking excited to go back to my lessons *happy dance* i know... i'm bookie :P  
_

I have a new blog in tumblr, you can find the link in my profile page and be informed about my stories, the harmonian site i own and news about hhr :)

Enjoy...

_

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Chapter Eight – Chased Away_

_27 of July, 2002_

He was going to be normal, act normal, seem normal, he had to do this, for his sake, for his sanity, for his friendship with her.

Her, the woman he was in love with, Hermione Granger.

_DARN IT!_

Harry's thoughts had been rapid and crazed for the past days, the past three weeks for him were a total Hell, he had finally admitted it to himself, he was in love with his best friend.

It sounded crazy, not the falling part, but the not realizing, not seeing things earlier. Well he didn't have something to compare to –kissing a girl in the middle of the common room because some chest monster felt like it wasn't good practice, let alone kissing a crying over her ex girl earlier- he had not fallen in love for someone else, the girls he had tried to date had all ended up being simple nights of pleasure, and even that got spoiled when he called out Hermione's name…

Her presence in his life had been so intense ever since he was a little boy, she was always there, first as a friend, then as a best friend, even as a sister at first due to the young of their age, like a shoulder to fight by his side later on, a protector to help and defend him and the rock he always needed to keep up during the dark days of the hunt… all these could be summed up in a simple, four-letter word but he knew he would feel even more stupid if he admitted that instead of a sister, he had gained a wife for all these years. Only the sexual part was still missing, the rest was there, always was there.

His cheeks burnt as he thought of the sexual part, he wanted her, wanted to feel her hand not only in his own palm like he had felt it, around his shoulders in her hugs that now had almost been extinct or her caresses on his head that made his eyes close. He wasn't ignorant of her beauty, had noticed ever since he was fourteen, his body always seemed to react at her better than his brain did, his eyes closed at her touch, his jaw fell open at her very sight, his hands always gripped for her to help first.

He wanted more, he wanted to feel her arms around his back while he'd be on top of her, loving her body like none else, he wanted to be hers and he wanted her to be his, there was just one problem: he had no idea about how she felt and the thought of informing her of his feelings just made him choke.

He didn't want to lose her, having admitted or not his feelings to himself, that fact didn't change, he didn't want to lose her, didn't want to chase her away. He believed her for a sister for years, how was he supposed to tell her such truth now? How would she react? What if she couldn't return his feelings in the slightest? Would they be awkward for the rest of their lives? Like they were now? Was this turning point the end of their friendship?

Only the thought of losing her from his life drove him crazy. That very fear had him deciding that the best thing to do – at least for the time being- was to suppress his feelings for her. He would hide his feelings and he would succeed, even if he had to hide such thing concerning her, the person that knew him better than anyone else, he was going to make it.

His bleeding heart for her wouldn't sacrifice their friendship, they had already gotten too awkward as it was, the past months had been Hell for both of them, he was going to make her his best friend again and he was going to compromise with that status, like he always compromised in his life…

_"…I love Harry like a brother…"_

_"… And he loves me like a sister…"_

_"…we're best friends…"_

_"…we're like siblings…" _

Her words that afternoon in the Leaky Cauldron with Teddy stung now as much as they stung back then but he couldn't do something, that was her side, expressed out loud by herself, who was he to destroy her standards just because his heart finally awoke in all the selfness love it had received from Hermione?

He hated himself, for lying to everyone with his actions and words –himself included-, back in the War, he had to found some balances, he had forces delusions of being something like siblings for them to survive, his own mind had kept him from Hermione, knowing that if she was his girlfriend back then, he would had never allowed her to be close, with him in the hunt. He had pushed Ginny away but he wouldn't have made it with Hermione, partly because he had absolutely needed her and partly because she'd never left his side. His mind had selfishly denied his heart's opportunity to be with the person that meant so much to him.

But now his heart was taking over, destroying all the fog that had been created during the war, he hadn't fitted with Ginny, how can you have a relationship when it's just based on some snoging and teen, hormonal awkwardness? He had no serious relationship ever since he felt the first teen urges, Ginny was the road back to Hogwarts, back to safety, she had represented all the things his depressed, starved and desperate self had needed back then, but when he was finally free, he had realized that there was nothing there, only traumas that Ginny couldn't possibly heal for him, how can you heal something when you don't know how it was caused?

Hermione had been there, sacrificing her life, her parents' lives, her everything for him. He wasn't a fool or oblivious person, in the past days he had considered her actions in a different light, could she had been in love with him and she had done all those things?

Or was she just the most perfect friend a human being can ask for? Both options should be sounding amazing, if only they weren't reversing each other. What was he for her, her best friend or something more? Had he ever been something more for her? Could she had fallen for him and then fall out of love since he was so oblivious to notice and so scared to accept? She had shown a lot of signs of sexual tension towards Ron and that cut down his hopes, but on the other hand, she had said and as Ron had said himself… she had chosen Harry.

'Come on, mate, MOVE!' Ron shoved him so Harry could finally move inside the kitchen of the Burrow, after a small match of Quidditch the two had gathered the broomsticks and Harry had been waiting for Ron to lock everything away, even the broom ride hadn't helped a lot with his current state of mind as he was again lost in his torturous thoughts.

'We're back!' Ron shouted as the two young men got inside the deserted kitchen. With questioning looks to each other at the lack of response, the two moved inside the living room, where they found most of the girls on the floor. Harry's jaw fell open.

They were all sat on the floor with pregnant Fleur in the middle, Hermione on her right, Ginny slightly behind and between them, Luna on Fleur's side and Lavender next to Ginny while Molly was sat on an armchair close to the wireless that played music so the girls could keep up. What had Harry's mouth falling open and Ron snickering was while Fleur had her actual pregnant belly round and all, the rest of the girls had pillows beneath their blouses and shirts as to practice with Fleur who, truth to be told, was more than cranky than usual due to her hormones, so this was probably the result of her commands.

Harry's eyes had been on Hermione instantly, her hair was free on her back, her lips slightly parted and panting as they did some exercises with the legs, her _long_ legs that now were bared as she wore shorts and a blouse, her leg moved up and down while she laid on her side and had to move her leg without touching her ankles.

In the past years, Harry had never dared think of the future, first because he wasn't sure if he'd be alive for the next day and later on because it all seemed uncertain and undecided, there were no plans in his head for a family, only the hope for it. And right now, as he looked at Hermione, the person who was always there, the person he hoped that would be there in a different way for the future, it made his heart ache. He had to admit, she was beautiful with a round belly, she would be beautiful while pregnant, giving birth to a beautiful brown haired child with sparkling gree-

'OH Merlin's pants, that hurts!' Ginny screamed in pain, pulling him out of his thoughts, as now they were changing the exercise and they were moving their waists, bowing and then straightening up.

'Maybe we shouldn't be tiring the pregnant woman,' Hermione said in a struggling voice and Ginny glared at the brunette.

'Look at her!' she's just fine, all energy and stuff, on the other hand, we're gonna die here! AAOH!' Ginny shouted and then moaned in pain as she finally surrendered and let her back on the floor. 'I'm done with this!' she finally said and made to stand up but her mother glared at her.

'Since you're engaged, you're probably next with this…' Molly said sternly and Ginny groaned and shook her head.

'Nope, after growing up with six brothers… nope, children are not in the schedule for at least five more years, If I'm as fecund as you were, mom, nope, children will have to wait!' Ginny retorted and put her hair up in a ponytail after she took the pillow from under her t-shirt with the Weird Sisters stamp on.

'Oh come on now dear sister, imagine all the little black and white redheads you can have with Dean,' Ron snickered again or actually went on doing so and Ginny glared at him and threw towards his direction the pillow she was holding, her chaser's skill got it right but Ron's keeper talent stopped the pillow from colliding with his face.

'Well, get ready for squealing, loud and nonstop hungry children between you and Lav-Lav here…' Ginny snapped and Ron's joking evaporated, replaced by a deep blush and a frown while Lavender glared at him for the change of the mood. Harry was still looking at Hermione who finally raised her eyes and looked at him for a moment.

Their eyes locked, just for a bit, enough for him to see it all, to have his thoughts back in action, he would love to see her and none else as the woman by his side, like always, only now having the place of his wife, the mother of his children. He was so desperate with all this, the past weeks driving him crazy and the past days having him afraid of his own shadow that he imagined of pregnancies and children just by looking at her with a pillow under her clothes, Merlin's beard, he was doomed!

'OK, I think I'm done too,' Hermione finally said as she panted and stood up, taking off the pillow and breaking the eye contact with Harry abruptly, Fleur, Lavender and Luna remained under the gentle smile of Molly's who kept up explaining how to perform the next pregnancy exercise.

'Stop staring,' Hermione finally murmured at Harry, 'and stop laughing because I won't be running around London to find watermelon with chocolate dressing when Lav-Lav here will be carrying your children…' she added as she looked at Ron who sobered once again.

'I don't want children,' Ron finally said and the gasp that was heard by Lavender's lips had them all pausing. 'at least not now?...' he added as both Lavender and Molly were glaring at him while Luna looked at him with her casual, dreamy eyes.

'We have to talk about this, now,' Lavender said and snatched Ron after standing up still with the pillow under her dress, Ron groaned and huffed as he was particularly dragged upstairs. Hermione smirked and Harry was sure she probably had some conversation with Lavender about this, he was also sure Hermione looked so cute while smirking with mischief.

Ginny moved upstairs too, in her old bedroom as to change and Hermione followed, when she was back, she had changed into comfortable sweatpants and a nice t-shirt with a butterfly on. Harry smiled as the two got inside the kitchen, where he'd been waiting; Ginny gripped a cookie with one hand, some floo powder with the other, said something about her job needed her more than a pregnant sister-in-law and left in a burst of green flames while Hermione remained standing.

'Can we have a walk outside?' she asked and Harry nodded and followed her, not sure what she wanted. They moved around the garden, taking their time in silence until Hermione turned around and took Harry's hand, something she hadn't done in weeks as he realized, he felt a surge of power, like electricity ran through his veins at her touch and by now he knew it wasn't just the surprise he felt while she smiled somehow uneasy at him.

'Lavender wants us to go on vocations for your birthday, her, Ron, me and you, before the cup it'll be Ron's only chance to relax, she said,' she finally said and Harry felt like the air left his lugs, he expected something different, not sure what, just something different, yet there she was, anticlimactic and all while she held his hand in her petite one.

And then he registered her words inside his head, _vocations_, just the _four_ of them, almost like _couples_, practically the _two_ of them since Lav and Ron were known for their "activities". Vocations with Hermione in some romantic place he was sure Lavender had already found. It would be disastrous, he had been trying to be normal around Hermione in a daily bases with minimum of contact as they still felt awkward after the night of the fight in the tent. Vocations with her around all day long wouldn't be a good idea, how was he supposed to hide his feelings from her, of all people when they'd be together for so long? How was he supposed to salvage his friendship if he was to spend so much time with her and her alone?

'Sounds nice,' he heard himself saying before he could stop the idiotic part of him agreeing, the part that wanted to see her in a swimsuit. Hermione's eyes shone and he could swear now she looked more beautiful than before.

'She wants us to go there tomorrow, just three or four days since Ron has to return and join the national team for the Cup, she has found a nice magical island in Italy, Isle Diana, It's a beautiful place, I've searched about it, we could go there and _relax_, maybe…' Hermione said and Harry this time smiled truly at the sound of her voice, she seemed excited and even if it'd be difficult for him to hide things, he needed a break, a change of this constant routine, maybe this vocation would help after all as this was his first free summer from training. 'She's talking with Ron now, we just have to go back home and pick some of our stuffs,' Hermione was adding but Harry was still looking at her smile, almost ready to lean in, until Lavender screamed from the window of Ron's bedroom that he had agreed and that they could leave early in the next morning.

Harry was exhausted as he finally collapsed on the hotel's couch, the suite the four shared was huge with three bedrooms, one for Ron and Lavender and the two others for himself and Hermione respectively. He felt as his body was ready to explode and shut down at the same time, his feet burning, his back sore from all the walking, this vocation was supposed to be relaxing but he hadn't thought of the deal including Lavender's thirst for shopping and Hermione's love for learning.

It was two days ago, when they arrived that Lavender took them all for shopping, in the trio's dismay, they had portkeyed in Rome, as the hotel gained them access to Muggle places of Italy and the trio had been dragged around Rome's shopping side as Lavender adored the expensive brands of the muggle designers. Hermione had complained that they had such stores in London too but Lavender had just glared daggers at her and kept moving around the stores like a maniac.

And the next day was Hermione's turn to torture them, she had decided that Italy was a fascinating place to visit not for the stores but the historical parts; after all, it was the place the Roman Empire was born. The day before she had taken them all in the ancient sights, to Ron, Harry and Lavender's dismay Hermione knew everything about the whole city but she hadn't visited it with her parents so she was eager to see all the things she had read about in books, so walking around the Coliseum, the piazza del Popolo, the Fontana di Trevi and all the other sights of Rome should have satisfied the young witch.

And when Harry thought the nightmare was over, that day too, included a Hermione-ish tour at the Vatican. At some point Lavender and Ron sneaked out, apparating before Hermione could start a fight but Harry didn't have it in him to disappoint her as she wanted to see Peter's cathedral and after all, it was the only place they had left to visit, how they made the whole tour of Rome in two days, it was beyond him but after all he was with Hermione Granger, the brightest witch of their age.

Now his body was tired and his mind full of information about everything Rome related, he could swear that if he heard one more detail about the Vatican's treasury he would cast the Avada on himself. However, having these three days running around different places of Rome, had given him the precious gift of not thinking about his proximity with Hermione too much. He was too exhausted and when they were back they had a dinner to Ron's happiness and then they'd both go to bed, after silencing their rooms.

His dreams however were a different matter, the past two nights, like the weeks before them were full of dreams with Hermione. Memories of their school years and the hunt, and the years afterwards, and then he was seeing things he _hoped_ to happen, things that would make him blush and need hours to cool off, were he awake.

'What should we do?' Hermione's voice interrupted his thoughts and he blushed as if she could ever know of what he was thinking. 'Ron and Lavender obviously won't return anytime soon,' Hermione added and Harry smiled at her small frown, she was still mad at them.

'Well we could go to the restaurant we saw yesterday, have dinner and then a walk, maybe?' Harry offered, now that they were finally done with the tours and the sightseeing they could probably enjoy the rest of the two days that remained. Hermione smiled and nodded, agreeing. She turned around and got in her bedroom as to change and Harry decided to do the same, tomorrow was his birthday and even if he felt somehow bad for not celebrating with the rest of the Weasleys and his friends, he was glad he would be away from the Wizarding Britain that always got crazy about that day.

Twenty minutes later, he was waiting in the living room of the suite in a pair of black pants and a deep blue shirt, his hair abandoned already but washed and clean. He was looking out of the window at the beautiful view of the sea but he turned around when he heard Hermione's door opening. He tried not to have his jaw hitting the floor once again.

Simply dressed as always, in a knee-length, dark pink dress with a deep V neckline that made him gulp, her hair in a simple bun that allowed her not to sweat because of the high temperatures of Italy, yet some locks were escaping here and there and a pair of mid high heels completed her beautiful image, only her lips had a little lip-gloss as her cheekbones and nose had turned a little pinkish because of the hot, Italian sun she was exposed to for the past three mornings.

'You look…beautiful,' Harry said before he could stop himself and Hermione's already pinkish cheeks blushed.

'Thank you, Harry,' Hermione said as Harry approached, still his eyes glued on her beautiful image. The two moved close to each other by the door, Hermione taking her purse as Harry opened the door for her to move first, she did so but as she brushed her arm with his chest he almost gasped at the friction of her body with his.

_Merlin's beard! Keep it together, Potter!_

The restaurant was just a five-minute walk from their hotel so they started moving slowly, Hermione taking his hand once again and Harry smiling at the feel. The tables were mere meters from the coast, they chosen a beautiful spot, under some magnolias and they sat close to each other on the small table for two.

They ordered pasta again, carbonara for Harry and bolonez for Hermione and Harry chose a bottle of red wine even if Hermione insisted that he should be more considerate of his money.

'Well we're just a few hours from my birthday so allow me to buy the dinner…' Harry said and Hermione shook her head but surrendered as they both knew he never cared and would ever care about money. They ate their food in comfortable silence, occasionally commenting on the things they had seen in the past days and when they were done both with their food and wine, Harry decided to try the panakota, a delicious dessert, Hermione didn't resist and ordered one for herself too. When they were done, Harry paid the bill that had Hermione frowning and warning him that next meal was on her and they started for the walk. In their way away from the restaurant's tables, a little Muggle boy tried to sell a rose to Harry for his "_bella_ _innamorata_" as the boy said, having them both blushing furiously. Harry couldn't resist and bought two roses, one red, one white and offered them to Hermione.

'You had conjured the roses for my parents… I guess you like roses…' Harry only said at the blushing Hermione who took the two flowers with a small smile.

'Oh Harry, thank you, I love them,' she said in a slow voice and hugged him tightly; Harry's eyes closed as he inhaled the caramel scent of her shampoo and wrapped his arms around her waist.

'Thank you, Hermione, for everything,' he whispered and felt her nodding her head before she could move her head slightly away and give him a kiss on the cheek that took his breath away, just like it had happened at the end of their fourth year.

It took all his willpower not to turn his head right then and there and claim her lips with his own, but no, he was thanking her for being such a good friend to him, he wasn't going to spoil it because of his new feelings, feelings that threatened to destroy that friendship. She had said again and again that they're like siblings, that was her reality, she had even refused the possibility of sleeping with him for that very reason…

'OK, we should move…' her voice brought him back to realize that he was still holding her in his arms as she gently tried to break free. He unwrapped his arms from around her immediately but once again, Hermione took his hand in hers. They started walking along the beach, just a mere meter from where the waves were covering the wet sand again and again. There was a bright moon above them with clouds surrounding it but not covering the bright planet yet, its light was clothing everything in that white-silver gloom, it probably wasn't a full moon, but it was certainly approaching.

'This is really beautiful,' Hermione commented lightly as they kept moving along the beach, Harry turned his head and looked at her, her face was even paler under the moon's gloom, her eyes seemed black but the moon shone inside them as she was looking up at the sky. Harry couldn't stop but think how beautiful she looked, simple and beautiful, like always.

'That it is,' he finally admitted, not knowing what else to say as her eyes traveled on him. She smiled brightly and nodded as they kept walking, occasionally, the hand that wasn't holding his was bringing the roses close to her nose so she could smell the aroma.

'Thank you, Harry, I know it's not your best activity running around the whole city and I was not considerate of what you might want to do…' Hermione said after awhile and Harry smiled and shook his head.

'I had a good time, Hermione… really; it was good for me to learn some things about the history of Italy, now I can play smart easier…' Harry said and Hermione grinned and nodded as they reached some rocks at the end of the coast, where a small hill was starting. Without much consideration, they took off their shoes and climbed the small rocks and sat on one of them by each other's side, where the waves didn't crush on them with much force.

They hadn't realized how long it had been ever since they left the restaurant as time flew by and Hermione at some point checked on her wrist watch, smiled brightly and took out of her purse a small gift, turned into its true size and gave it to Harry with a smile.

'I guess the shopping Hell with Lavender gave fruits, I bought this for you, happy birthday Harry!' Hermione said as Harry beamed and took the gift as it was probably a few minutes after twelve, his birthday starting. He tore the wrapping paper and smiled at the all time Hermione-ish favorite kind of gift, a book about battling spells in ancient Italy, the version of 1875. He was sure he could find some very good spells he could use now and his enemies wouldn't know about them, a good advantage when in battle. Harry smiled at Hermione and hugged her with one arm as she did the same with both.

'Thank you, Hermione, this is really useful.' Harry said honestly and Hermione smiled at him and nodded before she could tap her wand's tip on his gift for it to get shrunk so it could fit in his pocket, Hermione vanished the wrapping paper as well, not wanting to leave garbage behind them and then she spoke.

'I'm glad you had fun while being educated, this book will help you further.' Hermione said and Harry grinned. 'You need to play smart and actually have something to say…' she added and Harry this time pocked her ribs, making her laugh as the clouds above started covering the moon.

'Hey! I know plenty of stuff to play smart just fine,' Harry retorted lightly and Hermione nodded in an obvious way.

'That you do, apart the complete lack of knowledge in magical history since you spent the lessons in slumber…' Hermione said and this time Harry started tickling her, needing to feel carefree with her and succeeding.

'Take it back, Granger, I studied plenty of the darned thing during my training in the academy. I'm as good as you are,' Harry said while they both laughed, Hermione shook her head.

'That I don't accept! I scored my exams when you just made it because professor Binns never knew who student was who!' Hermione retorted and squealed when Harry gripped her hand and moved down the rock they were sat at, still high enough for a dive where the water was calmed.

'Then accept this,' Harry smirked as he took her in his arms bright style and stepped away from the rock and towards the water. Hermione gave a shriek and closed her nose with her fingers of the hand that still held the roses while the other clung on his shoulders as they both fell inside the water.

They emerged a few moments later, all wet and laughing and Hermione started splashing water at Harry until the first raindrops started falling as the summer storm broke, causing both to swim close to the shore and out of the water barefoot as their shoes and her purse were still on the rocks. Harry retrieved them while Hermione cast a spell with her wet wand on the tortured roses who immediately perked up and looked as if untouched, she looked around and saw the beach almost being deserted as the people in the restaurants tried to save themselves from the sudden rain. Hermione smiled and took her shoes and back from Harry's hands when he moved close, thinking they could now apparate away and save themselves from the water but he didn't let the laces for a moment, having her close with her body dripping and her hair in a wet, messy bun.

The two looked at each other, their hands on her sandals while Harry's free hand held his own shoes while Hermione held the roses. Their bodies close to each other's as Harry slightly towered Hermione now that she was barefoot like him, both of them in the middle of the rain. They didn't move away from each other and he didn't leave her sandals' laces as they kept looking at each other, panting and wet from the dive under the moonlight and now the sound of the raindrops hitting the sandy beach around them.

And then, his heart decided to give the last blow to his brain, he let both their shoes and her purse, an instant later held her face with both his hands and the instant after that, he kissed her passionately on the lips.

His shoes were on the sand, hers still held by her numb hand, like the other held the roses while her lips were claimed by his. For a moment more, she remained numb and frozen and then she abandoned her own shoes and purse, wrapped her arm around his neck while the other that still held the roses wrapped around his shoulders, his own arms wrapping around her waist and cupping the back of her neck as their wet bodies collided with each other in a fight of domination and a try to become one under the rain.

That was for a few blissful, _heavenly_ moments of feeling like everything was fine in the whole world, of the last piece of the puzzle finally getting into place as Harry felt her soft lips with his, his tongue tasting her sweet mouth with the memory of panakota still in and the salty sense from the seawater and he felt her own tongue on his, tasting the same things, until he felt warm, salty drops touching his lips and he knew it wasn't the seawater anymore as Hermione broke the kiss in a sob.

'No,' she whispered harshly as their foreheads touched and they took in some much needed oxygen, he barely heard her above the rain's noise as Harry's eyes were desperate at the sound of her denial. 'No, this is not right… this is just… not right, Harry…' Hermione added with a broken voice and looked up at him with shiny eyes, this time not from the moon reflected in them but from tears that were ready to follow the first ones that had fallen along the raindrops that ran down her face.

'Why?... wait, we… I… you and I-'Harry tried to reason with her, with himself, he had never said he loved someone, ever, and he didn't want to say something so deep out of desperation, he didn't want her to think he would say something like that because he was desperate, even if he knew this was the only way for her to believe him.

'_You and I_ are friends for the better part of our lives and we shouldn't screw it because of some tensed months… I've done the mistake before with Ron and I'm not doing it again, not with you… we… I'm like your sister, you said that yourself.' Hermione finished his stammering for him but not in the way he wanted. He would have preferred a slap, some screaming or even a hex but not that, not these sad eyes that bore into his own desperate ones, not these tears that ran down her cheeks and that despair coloring her features.

Before he could say another word, something, anything, she took her arms away from him; she bowed, took her shoes and purse with one hand and started moving away as fast as she could in the rain with her dress clinging on her body as her other hand threw away and in the water the two roses before her hand could move close to her mouth as to muffle the sobs that racked her body.

And Harry remained there, unable to do anything as the whole thing sunk in, he had kissed Hermione and he had lost her, he had done the one thing he had swore not to; chase her away with his actions. He had frightened her as she had tried something similar with Ron; she was choosing their friendship over anything else that could blossom between them. He had lost the battle if not the war and now there he was, alone, with his eyes burning with a sense that had nothing to do with the salty water or the rain and his heart bleeding and torn because of her, thrown in the water just like the roses by her, floating helplessly on the waves that hit the sand mercilessly.

'…_I'm like your sister, you said that yourself.' _Her last words, the lie he had forced everyone –himself and her included- to believe, after almost being murdered by Ron, now hurt him more than ever…

* * *

OOOOH poor Harry! and poor Hermione! and such a romantic scene in an italian beach by the moon right before the storm huh? aww what u think guys, wasn't hermione cute with the fake belly? and poor Ginny's back must be sore after the exercises hehe and then the trip... and the diving and the holding hands like they always held them and then the KISS you demanded a kiss and i decided to have it finally but now what is gonna happen? he scared our girl away, tell me what u think guys :)

thanks for reading

many reviews=quick updates :) it's official and it's a deal ;)

CP09


	9. Maybe

_College started, guys, sorry for the small delay but you have no idea how crazy people are LOL and the weather changed rapidly from the happy greek sun to cloudy londonish clouds and rain and i'm like gloomy and blue (it's a shame the from light to darkness is over, lol i would vent there) well here is the new chapie and i can only say one thing, and one thing only:_

_HUGE THANKS FOR THE REVIEWS! YOU'RE JUST GREAT AND I LOVE YOU!_

_Enjoy...  
_

_

* * *

Chapter Nine – Maybe_

_August the 5__th__ 2002_

_Hermione put her hands on Buckbeak's back and Harry gave her a leg up. Then he placed his foot on one of the lower branches of the bush and climbed up in front of her. He pulled Buckbeak's rope back over his neck and tied it to the other side of his collar like reins._

_'Ready?' he whispered to Hermione. 'You'd better hold on to me -'_

'POTTER! FOCUS!' the Head auror's furious voice snapped Harry's momentary drifting as the spell smashed the wall right above Harry's head. The young wizard ducked and fell on the ground before he could fire a disarming spell that lost the main fighter of the opponent team.

Harry was on his first abroad mission as a ministry Auror in Guatemala and so far he was doing fine, apart the moments of the Hermione-related thoughts and memories rushing inside his mind like an unstoppable river. This was the last night of three-days long mission as the people there needed help and the British ministry had decided to help, first by sending some Aurors to examine what was needed and then, later in the month, send more forces against the warlocks.

It had been five days ever since he had kissed Hermione, two of those had been spent by them not even looking at each other as Hermione had made sure to keep a distance at all costs. He hadn't even found the time to tell her he was leaving for his first mission, as she had made sure to be at Hogwarts for some unknown to him excuses, they both knew she was hiding and they both knew they needed to solve this for their own good.

But he didn't know how, even on impulse, his action, his kiss was true and he hoped for a better receive than her running away from him for her part. He was angry because of her reaction, angry with himself for losing his composure and kissing her when he had sworn not to push things, just a tad hopeful for the fact that she struggled too, that he wasn't on his own in this, so there must be something there, in her, for him, and desperate for the future of theirs.

He was still hiding behind the deserted sack as he fired the next spell but didn't have time to protect himself as two curses were unleashed toward him. The moment the spell hit him, he knew the next thing he'd saw would be England and his angry chief.

Two days later, with a little effort, Harry was moving through the Burrow's garden gate to be greeted by a bunch of people as he moved closer and closer to the building. A regular summer afternoon at the Burrow included everyone gathered, tables outside with chairs for dinner later on and a lot of broomsticks in the air for the men's free time while the ladies usually spent their time outside or helping Molly with the food preparation.

Ron, George, Bill, Luna, Ginny and Dean greeted Harry after landing on the ground, Harry, even exhausted and slightly in pain because of the mission's wounds that still needed some days to get completely healed with the spells he had to cast daily on himself, hugged his friends and greeted them. When they released him, Ron helped him by giving a shoulder of support.

'Where's Hermione?' Harry tried t sound light, carefree, but his heart skipped a bit at the sounf of her name.

'Inside, with mom, you know she's bored of Quidditch so she decided to help with dinner.' Ron said and Harry nodded his head as he glanced towards the kitchen's window.

'Is she alright?' Harry asked and Ron looked at him oddly.

'Apart the fact she's not talking to anyone, she's tensed all the time and screamed at me her head off when I informed her of your departure, she's the good old, mental Hermione.' Ron answered and Harry sighed. 'Care to explain why she's like that ever since the day of your tour in that Vatican big church and why you've been like that for the past months, you know I play dumb but I'm trying not to be…' Ron added and Harry sighed and nodded his head, of course at least Ron would have noticed, they weren't very subtle after all with all the fights and the uncomfortable silences when such things didn't exist before in their relationship..

'It's complicated…' Harry finally said and Ron paused his walking as they were just a couple feet from the Burrow kitchen's door. Harry stopped too as he was supported by his best mate.

'Lav told me not to be getting involved in other people's business… but… just don't hurt her, she's been through enough as it is…' Ron said seriously and Harry felt his words hurting him more than he could have expected, his best friend's words also frightened him, reminding him how many things Hermione indeed had been through, from sacrificing her parents' lives and all her saving in the war to almost dying more times than he wanted to remember. And then Harry felt slightly angry with Ron as his previous hurt for Hermione's words a few days ago magnified too_. _

_I've done the mistake before with Ron and I'm not doing it again, not with you… _Hermione was afraid of what had happened with Ron in the past, he hated to know he hadn't acted earlier, hadn't felt the things he felt now in all their glory, Ron had messed up and Hermione was afraid and on one hand, Harry was satisfied they were separated, on the other he knew he had to gain Hermione's trust in this, then see if she has any similar feelings to return and all that while he still felt dizzy and pained from the mission!

'Listen, Ron…I know it seems different right now… but I'm trying not to hurt her, I swear.' Harry finally said as the setting sun's glow gave a beautiful orange colour upon everything, Ron sighed and shook his head as they started moving again.

'She was never a sister to you, was she?' Ron only commented and Harry sighed, was there any point in hiding behind their fingers?

'I _thought_ she was… but no… she isn't…' Harry finally said and Ron sighed but didn't comment further as the kitchen's door opened and Molly Weasley hugged Harry in a suffocating hug.

She knew he was back, she felt it the moment she saw the Weasleys, Luna and Dean landing in a hurry from their brooms, why else would the Weasley kids abandon their flying if not for someone arriving, the only one missing from the family. Hermione's heart had skipped a beat the moment she saw him from afar, through the kitchen's window, he was back and she had to face him eventually.

She had been a coward, she knew, some Gryffindor she was, running away like a scared four-year-old by the bogey. But her bogey had came to life that night, even if she had enjoyed the dinner, and the roses she so much had regretted throwing away, and she had enjoyed even the diving Harry had forced both into, she hadn't realized how comfortable and happy and great she had felt with him, until his lips were kissing hers.

The moment she had been wondering, fantasizing and hoping for had taken place seven days ago and she had wasted it away.

Why?

There were so many reasons, reasons of the past, mostly… reasons of the present and issues for the future… He had stammered after she broken the kiss, he had tried to say _something_ but even then, he had paused, looked at her desperate and then she had taken it upon herself to finish that night in the worse way possible. He hadn't said it, maybe even if he had done so, it'd be simple words, yet, she wanted him to say it, even if he didn't mean it as she hoped for, even if he didn't mean at all, even if it was out of his character to say things to her that he didn't mean, she had _needed _to listen to him saying it and he hadn't, and that hurt a lot.

For her, it had started years ago, she pitied herself sometimes, not able to move on properly, never finding someone and not compare him with Him, always thinking of how he would act or react in various situations. It was pathetic, she knew it, yet she couldn't do something about it, she had been way too deep into his life, himself, she had became a part of him and her life had revolved around him for longer than she would like to admit.

Yet, she was afraid, scared, _frightened_ of what would happen if they failed, it wouldn't be as if she hadn't failed with a best friend before. Of course Ron was different, but she wasn't willing to take the chances, even if things seemed rocky with Harry for these months and even if her heart screamed things to her brain, Harry was her best friend and his support, understanding, care and compassion couldn't be traded with the _possibility_ of something more, of passion and love and sex and kids with beautiful eyes and messy or bushy hair. It was too much, too soon, too late at the same time and she was utterly confused as she stood there, frozen above the semi-cut onions for the dinner.

'EVERYBODY! LOOK WHO'S BACK!' Ron's booming voice made all the rest inside the house to gather around the doorframe, where Harry stood, with a frozen smile staring straight in her eyes, just like she did. Even if his face occasionally got hidden in red hair or his body was hugged and patted and his brain questioned and spoken to, his eyes were cast on hers just like her own were and his lips were sealed as they stare at each other.

And the cowardice was back inside her again, even if she knew she'd made Voldemort laugh and Godric Gryffindor hide his face in his palm shamefully. She just allowed everyone else hug and greet him, ask him of his tired appearance and painful frowns every time someone squeezed too hard and she just kept cutting the onions, as her eyes hid themselves from his gaze, her ears remained fully functioning as she was dying to give him a huge hug, interrogate him with her healer skills about his traumas and then find the perfect soothing products for his needs, she remained distanced, she chose the easy over the right thing to do.

_So she wanted to play like that, the hard way._ Harry thought as he saw her returning on her onions, without approaching him and giving a hug, a _word_, something! She wanted to keep hiding, she wanted to play dumb, well, he decided with an angry frown, he would play her game, he would allow her more and more to avoid him, he wanted to see how long she would last, how much of a coward she could be.

He hated feeling angry with her, of all people, but he had showed his bleeding heart the night of his birthday to her and she had tossed it in the water, like the roses he then picked up from the waves. He had exposed himself and even if he wasn't good with words, never was, she should have known, she should have noticed. He knew about her fears of history repeating itself but hiding for the better part of the past week from him didn't solve anything. Even if hated to talk about emotional things and feelings and stuff, this needed to be solved.

'Hey mate, we have some time until dinner's ready, care for a ride? A small match maybe, to have our appetite ready?' George offered and Harry actually considered the offer, he felt slightly dizzy, especially from the moment he saw Hermione again, maybe a ride would help, the twilight had just started, enough light for him to see the Snitch, maybe some fresh air would do him good.

'I'm in, I need some fresh air,' Harry finally said and he saw Hermione glancing at him for a moment before he could turn around and follow the rest to the garden, his leg giving an uncomfortable pang of pain as he moved.

He climbed on the broomstick, and even if it wasn't his Firebolt, it was a broomstick that took him up in the cold air and his mind momentary felt better. The dizziness returned and for a moment the Hermione-ish voice of his consciousness wondered if it was wise of him to be on a broom, tens of feet from the ground just a day after his trauma, but he decided to keep out any kind of Hermione related things, even his own mind and he set his eyes on George who unleashed the balls and then climbed on his own broom and took off.

For the first minutes, he felt carefree, he was on a broom, with his friends up there, looking for the golden Snitch after so long, he was having fun with not a care in the world. And then, just like that, his eyes got glimpse of the Burrow's roof, and the lower grounds, until his eyes looked at the ground floor, and the kitchen, and its door and window, where Hermione was behind from, and his mind returned to her at full force, almost painfully, punishing him for forgetting her even for mare minutes.

They needed to talk but his stubbornness was kicking in and he was getting angry with her, for acting like that, he knew she had her reasons but he also knew they had to talk with each other to find _some_ way, they needed to act as adults, and even it wasn't his forte, they had to do it but he wasn't sure if he should be the one to make the first move again. The ball was supposed to be in her side of the pitch, yet she seemed to even moving out of it as to avoid it.

His eye got a glimpse of the Snitch on his left and his head snapped at the direction, the wrong thing to do as it was proven. A wave of nausea and dizziness washed over him and Harry's hands gripped on the broom as he tried to regain his senses, he was at least thirty feet in the air and only the thought of lowering himself that moment only brought more dizziness.

He seemed as a small dot in the air from where she stood, inside the kitchen, an unmoving dot midair as he was probably looking for the Snitch. She sighed, this little dot was her best friend, Harry, the man she cared more than anyone else in her life, yet, he was the person she couldn't talk about all her feelings. She knew him, he would soon get angry with her, as she had gotten stubborn with him, yet she wasn't afraid of a row with her, because it'd be with her and not against her, what made her heart skip beats was the talk they would have afterwards, like they always did, the talk that was to result in confessions and the solving of their thing… what frightened her as well was the way they would solve their situation…

Her eyes were glued on the small dot, and as she registered her eyes, she noticed he moved slightly and then he remained still once again, usually he would move around, search the Snitch that she would swear she saw too, close to him, why wasn't he going for it? Did he want to give more time to Ginny and Dean to try and score against Ron? But Harry didn't seem to be watching the match beneath him; he was just there, still on his broom, until… he fell.

Hermione screamed in fright as she saw one of her worst memories repeating itself, she cut her finger as her body jerked in shock but she didn't even notice as she gripped her wand, made the window disappear and the next moment she was casting a spell to save Harry as the rest only started realizing that he was reaching the ground like a puppet thrown from the heavens, just like in their third year…

_'So many mistakes indeed, so many… irreparable mistakes,' Hermione said mostly to herself but for some reason these words were exactly the ones Harry wanted to say too…_

_'You slept with her…again.' she said, this time much lower, in almost a broken voice._

_Helena's face was different, more familiar, more beautiful, more unique as he called out Hermione's name. _

_'HERMIONE!' Harry fell to his knees beside her as Neville crawled rapidly towards her from under the desk, his wand held up in front of him. A whine of panic inside his head was preventing him thinking properly: he had one hand on Hermione's shoulder, which was still warm, yet did not dare look at her properly. Don't let her be dead, don't let her be dead, it's my fault if she's dead..._

_'Bye, Harry!' said Hermione, and she did something she had never done before, and kissed him on the cheek._

He heard a deep groan of pain and he realized it was his own lips producing it, his head was spinning as he opened his eyes and looked around at the familiar bedroom of Ron's, there was silence, a sterilizing serum he knew so well after the visits in the hospital wing of Hogwarts during his years there and later on in the past months as to visit Hermione.

_Hermione_.

'Hermione!' he groaned but he wasn't sure if his voice was clear, it didn't sound so but he gave his best.

He was rewarded a moment later as he felt a warm body hugging him tightly, as he remained on the bed, he knew her aroma, vanilla, caramel and parchment's sent remained above the sterilizing thing, his already blurred by the dizziness view got blocked by bushy hair and the only thing he could do was to wrap his arms around her delicate form as she whispered "Oh Harry…" close to his ear. He might hated the dizziness and the headache and her being so worried but he had to admit, he loved the feel of her body against his, her lips so close to his ear as she breathed in relief, the fact of her _being _relieved for him.

After that moment, he felt her stiffening in his arms and he also noticed he was holding her rather tightly. She broke the hug and he thanked Merlin for having got ridden of his glasses at the start of his training as he could see her face clearly with no help. Her eyes were bloodshot, her nose pinkish because of the crying, he had seen her face like that in multiple occasions and he had to admit, she looked broken, cute and beautiful. In instinct he reached with his hand and took away new tears as she smiled and leaned in his touch, were they making any progress?

'I'm alright,' he said and this time his voice was clearer than before. Hermione nodded and sighed in what seemed relief before she could frown.

'You shouldn't have gotten on a broom if you had post-trauma issues, I contacted your team through the floo and they informed you didn't accept to go to the hospital after the Stupefy you had on you.' Hermione said in a stern voice that usually was used for the stupid students who played with spells or dangerous potion at Hogwarts. Despite the scolding, Harry smiled, she hadn't only saved him, once again, she had also researched everything about what had happened to him, this was Hermione.

'I just wanted to have some fun after my mission in Guatemala…' Harry tried to calm her down, but Hermione remained frowned like his best friend would do.

'You're stubborn and reckless.' Hermione accused and Harry sobered up, maybe this was his chance to talk to her, now that they were alone in the room.

'You're stubborn too…' he retorted in a soft voice and Hermione got the hint, she moved away from the bed he was on, reaching Ron's old desk and gathering her medical stuff in a bag Harry had seen so many times before, during the hunt of the Horcruxes. 'Well can we at least talk?' he required in a loud voice he didn't mean to use, the results was her turning absurdly at his direction and his headache getting stronger.

'Talk about what, Harry? How we were supposed to be like siblings and now things change? The rules were set, by both of us, for _certain_ reasons and we were supposed to be following these rules.' Hermione snapped back at him and he allowed his mind a moment to register her words, so she was feeling things for him too, this was his chance to make it. He stood up with difficulty and Hermione rushed closer, gripping his forearms in support, he looked deep in her eyes as now they were finally close.

'These rules… were set because of our young age… because of the war… they're not accurate anymore, there is nothing holding us back,' Harry tried in a small voice as his heartbeat increased. Hermione shook her head sadly.

'There is, Harry, we changed, for better or worse I don't know, but we changed, I tried and failed with Ron, you notice me now and I… I can't risk another friendship, even with Ron, I'm not like I used to be and it's been years, there's still awkwardness and only Lavender has made it to make him move on like I did. I don't want the same awkwardness with you, I want to be able to rely on you, I want to be able to grip your hand or look deep in your eyes and not be afraid of what I'll feel.' Hermione said in a slow voice and Harry released his arms from her hands as to touch her face with his own hands. He wasn't sure he had it all registered again, trying to push away the headache and absorb all the information she was willingly or not giving, he needed to have a clear picture of her feelings for him.

'We won't fail… we'll make it, I'm not Ron and you're the same with me like you were with him, we're different… we always were, Hermione,' Harry said in a desperate voice again, he needed her to know that, he needed her to believe him, like she always did, he needed her. 'And you can always rely on me, like I do with you, you can always hold me like I do, you can always look at my eyes like I do with yours, but we can do so much more together… we can make it,' Harry added and held his breath as he watched her eyes filling with tears once again.

She felt her eyes burning, her heart accelerating almost painfully as she looked at his desperate eyes, the eyes she so much loved. Maybe he was right, maybe they could make it, maybe they were different indeed, maybe these rules were not accurate indeed. Maybe this mediocre life she led so far was time to end and maybe she should reach and take it all for once in her life, maybe.

_Maybe_

There was that maybe before, when she tried with Ron, when she thought that "maybe" things would be different post-war, that "maybe" he would understand her and she would be less demanding, that "maybe" it was just the war that made things difficult, that "maybe" he wouldn't have needed manuals to approach her.

So MAYBE, she could make it with Harry too, maybe, she could risk her friendship with him, the only thing that lasted from the moment she was getting to know herself and the Wizarding world as a little girl up to that moment, that she was held in his arms. Maybe she could risk another friendship, the deepest one, and the greatest in love's name, the name so many things had been sacrificed and died for, before.

This _maybe_ was always brought by her mind, to block her heart's desires and right now, even if her heart screamed for these obstacles to evaporate, to be gone, her brain, the infamous main force of hers, worked once again and denied all the desires and all the wants, and his desperate eyes as her mind commanded her to remain friends with him, to remain in the safe side, too compromise, not to risk, she had enough risking.

It wouldn't be the same with Harry, there was too much at cost here, only if he knew why she was always different with him than what she was with Ron… Only if Harry could realize just how much he meant to her, he probably wouldn't be risking either.

'We… I… you…' Hermione stammered for a moment as the tears finally left her eyes while they got shut to gain one more second to sort out her thoughts, her emotions, her life, her heart… 'Don't you understand?' she finally asked him, opening her eyes and looking at him as he waited for her response.

Her question felt like a trap, had he missed something? Had he not noticed something? Had he done something wrong? Had he screwed up? All his questions brought by her own were answered when she spoke.

'You're the most important person in my life, the person I have been revolving around for so long, and I had gotten used to be like that, because you're Harry, you're the— I have tried so hard to keep the balances, I have tried to be there for you no matter what. And now you're asking me to risk all that, you can't guarantee that we'll make it, it's only wishful thinking. You can't promise me we'll make it, you use your instinct, I use my brain and my brain says you can't guarantee that our friendship won't get screwed up, that I won't lose you.

' And I prefer to have you like that, like my fucking brother than having you not at all. You're too important to be jeopardized and that's both our fault, for letting it happen, for getting so deep in each other's lives, in each other's hearts, for becoming each other's parts. If I lose you, I won't be able to live and be the same, I made it without the rest, without my parents, without Ron, but I can't do it without you.' Hermione finally replied her question to him, for him.

The silence between them stretched, as they both held each other's eyes, each other's hearts in their fists. Her words played inside his head again and again, mixed, straight and mixed again. They were alike and different at the same time; indeed, he would just jump into things when she'd try to think things over, to find more than one ways out. She was the brains and he was the heart and even if for years, they worked perfectly together, now they were rivals with their future as the trophy.

Indeed, he couldn't promise or guarantee they'd make it, indeed he couldn't make sure, but he also couldn't keep living like that, in this mediocre thing that was built for years and he now noticed, for once, he wanted it all, he deserved it all, with her, he deserved her like no other man did and she deserved him even if she was afraid.

'I love you,' he finally said, with all the honesty he had, all the heart he had, all the love he had. This was the first time he said it to someone, anyone, and he knew this was the right person to say these words to. Her eyes frozen, seemed as two glassy orbs of brown crystal as she stared at him for an endless moment, he didn't know what else to do, what else to say, he gave it all and now he could only hope for a reward.

Hermione remained frozen, he had said the words she wanted to hear, he had said them, clearly, soberly even if he was recovering, he was good enough to say these words and meant them. Why could she not feel that this was enough? Why could she not rely on these words when spoken so clear and honest? Why she had to be like that? Why now?

'I love you too…' she whispered as she looked in his eyes, her voice small but determined, small but true. 'But it might not be enough…' she added and she knew she was killing him inside, she could see it in the flicker that got extinguished in his eyes, as his face fell, her own heart cried out in pain as her brain congratulated for her choice.

She left his arms, took her face away from his palms and moved away, snatched the bag in her hands and moved close to the door, not sure what she had achieved in this way, had she lost him? Had she given him what he wanted? Had he realized that she loved him too if not more? Would he ever forgive her for wasting this chance?

'Hermione?' she heard him calling her name in a husky voice, she knew that if she glanced now, she would see unshed tears in his eyes, tears _she_ caused, so she didn't look, just waited for him to speak as her hand grasped the doorknob of Ron's room.

'I won't stop, I'm not losing this because of a few years' false delusion and your stubbornness… and as always, I _will_ persuade you and you _will_ follow me once again in a new adventure, an adventure for the both of us… I'll show you my reasoning and you will follow.' Harry's words and tone almost frightened her; so determined, so firm, almost threatening, she had to restrain him more? He could accept more blows? She had to admit, a small part of hers, the beaten part that belonged to her heart smiled at his words, he was willing to fight for them.

Maybe, just _maybe_, this would be worth the effort after all…

* * *

oooh, Harry got stubborn... and Hermione is stubborn as well... who's gonna win? ooooh they said i love you to each other... i know you kind of hate herrmione guys but we don't know some things about her yet and well, try and get in her shoes for a moment... poor girl, harry is too precious in her heart to lose him.

what u think guys? ron noticed... and hermione saved harry once again, what do u think of the hhr scene? they were pretty honest and desperate for each other, and harry won't back down, not now that he got proof of her love! that's our boy!

with college taking away hours from every day... reviews are my greatest motive :) the deal is on

reviews=update...

CP09


	10. Hermione's Secret

_OOK everybody! here's the new chapter :) i hope you all will like it :)_

thank you SO much for the reviews, you're just amazing and even if i'm busy with college and stuff, you're a huge motive for me to keep up

Enjoy...

_

* * *

Chapter Ten – Hermione's Secret_

_August the 7__th__ 2002_

It had been two days ever since he opened his mouth to "threat" her with his words, promising he won't give up and currently, he had no idea how to materialize the things he had promised…

He wanted to make her see; he wanted to have her but what else could he do? He kissed her, told he loves her, told her they can make it, yet she was afraid and an afraid Hermione Granger was always a stubborn and closed up Hermione Granger.

_Darn it._

Harry sighed as he remained laid on his bed, the flat was silent, Ron was off with the team for the preparation of the opening match with Bulgaria for the World Cup and Hermione, like the day before, had disappeared at the Burrow and in Diagon Alley with Ginny for the redhead's wedding shopping of hers and Dean. Harry knew that if Hermione was into shopping, she was shitless scared to stay in the same place with him.

In a way, he was glad, because he needed time to form a plan, to think of what to do, he fully believed in the words he had said, he just didn't have a plan to follow, like always. And usually when he was in such situation, Hermione was the one to help him, to find the solution or the path to it for him, but this time, such option was out. He needed help from elsewhere.

What he was supposed to do? Hit her on the head, tie her up and get married to her under the threat of a wand? Sounded pretty strait but he didn't want to think about the moment she'd been released.

She had told him she loves him, it was huge, it was like an epiphany, yet the words that had followed had hurt him. They loved each other, they had even admitted it after all this time… how could this not be enough? Why she was so afraid? She had risked with Ron, yes she had failed but he deserved a chance too, maybe more than anyone else.

He always respected her and her decisions, her actions and ways, not because he wanted to achieve something, but because it always felt _natural_ and he always wanted to be high in her eyes, never to disappoint her, never to have her shed a tear for him. What else could she need from him? He had given her his heart on a plate for her to take and she had refused, he deserved a chance!

'Always the hard way…' Harry groaned as he stood up from his bed and decided to ask help from the first person that popped into his head.

Ten minutes later, Harry was knocking on the Lovegoods' new house door. Some music was heard and Harry could swear it was the Muggle band _Oasis_, well nothing surprised him anymore when it was about Luna and her father.

_Let there be love  
Let there be love  
Let there be love  
Let there be love_

Harry waited for a moment more and the door opened, revealing a beaming Luna Lovegood that looked at him with her big, dreamy eyes. Harry smiled back at his blond friend who for some reasons had things in common with himself. Luna grinned, hugged him and let him in after her happy greeting; she was wearing a light green dress with yellow straps that glowed every few seconds by magic.

The new household of the Lovegoods were even stranger than the first one that had partly gotten destroyed during the war, right after the Trio's visit. Even more strange objects adorned the walls and the furniture and Harry didn't even ask what all these things were.

'My dad is at the Quibbler, lets go to my bedroom,' Luna offered and Harry nodded his head as they moved up the stairs leading to the girl's room.

If something hadn't changed in the house that were the portraits of Luna's friends, Harry's included in her bedroom's wall, it made Harry smile and reassure himself that Luna could help a lot with his situation, his eyes remained a moment longer on Hermione's portrait before he could turn and look at Luna who was sat on her bed.

'So is this about you realizing you're in love with Hermione?' Luna asked casually, making Harry gasp and stare at her as he had no idea how she could possibly know.

'Uhm yes, it's about that, how come you know?' Harry asked as he sat too on the bed, the blond young woman laughed.

'Well things invisible to us are sometimes pretty obvious to others… aren't they now?' Luna asked lightly and Harry shivered at how observant and honest she could be.

'I guess you're right,' Harry said as he let out a sigh, he hadn't talked about the whole thing to anyone, not Ron, he felt uncomfortable, he actually never talked to Ron about his personal life because a part of it had included Ginny and now it was about Hermione so Harry had none to share his troubles for the past months.

'I told her that I love her, I kissed her, I spoke to her, I moved around the entire fucking Rome with her so she could be happy… and still she refuses to accept facts, she's afraid we'll fail and that our friendship is at cost, but what am I supposed to do? She was always there, she was in different forms, I have hugged her, kissed her, put her behind me to save her and I have been put behind her by herself to be saved, literally and not, I have danced with her, cried with her and now that I want to move to yet another level, she chooses to back off,' Harry finally snapped exasperated, his words moving out of his lips like a river.

'And I feel desperate because I feel like I have nothing else to show and nothing else is left to be shown to me, I have tried, and I promised her, almost threatened her that I won't stop. And I know she counts on that, I know her very well, I know she hopes for me to prove something we both have no idea about and my big mouth said things before my brain could think of what else to do and for the past days I have been staring at my bloody ceiling while she's been escaping the flat in the crack of dawn to avoid me, it drives me crazy!' Harry went on as Luna remained silent by his side.

'I know she loves me, she told me so, I know I have hurt her with Helena and my stupid rows with her, I usually don't row _against_ her but _with_ her, I know I have made her feel bad the past months but I haven't been in a better position, she's haunting me, every day and every night, in my sleep, when I'm awake, when she's away and when she's near me, we've been driving each other crazy for all these weeks and the only thing I can think of is of these eyes looking at me and I feel like the biggest idiot for not noticing before, when not so many things had happened.

'If I had opened my eyes earlier, maybe we'd be together since Hogwarts and now we'd be just fine.' Harry finally said in slower voice and right after his burst, he blushed deeply as he realized he had vented all the things he felt for Hermione before another girl, Luna of all people that somehow seemed the perfect choice.

'Well, Harry, first of all, you don't know if things would be fine with you two if you had found out each other during Hogwarts, maybe you needed to get through all these things, there's no pressure of a war upon your heads, you're both clear of any kind of fear and prophesy and evil. You're both pure and only pure trees give healthy fruits, the ones that have been watered and preserved with fear, evil, worry and war can only get destroyed, like you did with Ginny and Hermione did with Ron…' Luna said and Harry nodded his head, totally agreeing with this weird symmetry of his friend's.

'You have been feeling all these things for her recently, I think Hermione has been feeling these things for longer, try and think how you'd feel in her shoes.' Luna said and Harry this time looked agape at her.

'You mean you believe Hermione has been having feelings for me for more than the past months? Why she wouldn't say a thing to me?' Harry wondered and Luna actually snickered.

'You might be the Savor but you're such a typical male, Harry. She should have woken up one day, stand before you and confess her love? The reasons she sacrificed everything for you? The reasons she stayed when none else did? The reasons everyone believed you two are one thing ever since you were fourteen and I was thirteen?

'People like Molly Weasley who's supposedly like a second mother to both of you and people like Ron who's supposed to know you so well? If you think I don't know about the night with the locket, you're mistaken, I have heard the story from Ron himself during one of his drunken nights after the war, before he could get back with Lavender Brown… Point is, Hermione has been doing things only wives would do for their husbands…. Friendships, we want it or not, have limits, after a point, there are more important things that motivate us all.' Luna said and Harry felt like beating his head on the nearest wall.

He knew all these things, he had seen her, Hermione had indeed sacrificed everything for him, always was there, but he always labeled these actions as acts of friendship, he would do the same and more for her because she was probably the most important person in his life, she was Hermione.

The realization hit him, once again, like a truck. She was Hermione.

Titles like the one of the best friend and the sister and even the one of the wife masked one thing, her value to him, the value of the soulmate. Hermione was his soulmate and the title of the sister and the friend didn't necessarily overpowered the fact of Hermione being something like a wife to him for years now. A wife could also be a loyal friend, a good sister-like figure to count on with whatever troubled you, like couples do when time passes and they get old and only love remains and she could be so much more like a good wife, a loving partner, a great mother of his children.

'Oh dear Merlin and Morgana…' Harry groaned as he rubbed his face with his palms while Luna smiled at him.

'I think you should talk with Ron, he knows her as well, have seen things in her like a boyfriend that you haven't seen yet, maybe you should talk to him, after all, the change of the status of you and Hermione will change your friendship with him. And he might help you more with things we might both be unaware of.' Luna offered and Harry took a deep a breath and nodded. He had to talk with Ron anyway, in the past he wasn't talking such things with him because Ginny was Ron's sister, Hermione however was neither of them sister and he needed help by the person that knew Hermione almost as well as himself.

'You're right, thank you Luna, it's always enlightening to talk with you,' Harry said with a small smile and Luna grinned with her dreamy eyes moving at Hermione's portrait on the wall.

'Oh no problem, it's my pleasure, especially when I'll be telling your children how I helped their mom and dad get together and take their heads out of their asses.' Luna said with her dreamy voice and Harry actually chuckled as he stood up and thanked Luna once again. 'And Harry?' Luna added before Harry could apparate away. 'She's very fragile. She tries to hide it. She's difficult, you know that better than I, but if you make the effort, she's worth it. She's worth the effort.' Luna added and Harry smiled honestly in agreement…

The English Quidditch team was supposed to be one of the most well secured bunch of people in whole Britain but Harry made it to sneak into their camp, partly because of his name and partly because he pretended he was in an Auror mission that included the war Heroes. Merlin, if the auror office people were to hear of his lies…

'Harry! What are you doing here? Is anything wrong? They fetched me at once when you got in, they said it's about the war, did something happen?' Ron asked full of worry as he saw his friend. Ron was still in his uniform while Harry had returned home, put on his auror robes and portkeyed to the camp.

'No everything is fine; I just… needed to talk to you…' Harry said and Ron looked at him oddly.

'Couldn't it wait until after the first match? I am supposed to be really focused on here,' Ron said but Harry shook his head and Ron probably noticed Harry's eyes as he nodded his head and the two men started walking around the camp slowly.

'A couple of days ago… you asked about Hermione not being my sister after all, you remember that right?' Harry tried to start and Ron nodded, his hands clasped on the small of his back as they kept walking around. 'Well you were right, she's not my sister, never was actually, but for the past months I have been having feelings for her,' Harry started and glanced at Ron to make sure he was alright, no red ears and stuff that signaled the Weasley temper rising. Ron only nodded his head and looked at Harry.

'I know, I've noticed,' Ron said after a long moment of silence.

'I have told her that I love her and she told me the same but she thinks this is not enough, I've been trying, mostly in instinct to show to her that it will have a happy ending…' Harry added and Ron looked at him surprised, after a moment he sighed.

'I never told her I love her, I mean I do, of course I do, but I never felt like saying it to her out loud when I was with her,' Ron said after a moment and Harry sighed, they both were feeling uncomfortable but they were both mature enough to keep things normal, they were supposed to be fine with the past.

'Look Ron, I know this is probably tough for you, I mean, I was there… the night of the locket, but I believe we're done with that part of our lives, we all moved on from that evil night, you're our friend and I wanted to inform you before things change drastically at any direction. I wanted you to know, not to be left out.' Harry said before the silence could stretch even more and Ron nodded and spoke.

'That night a lot of things went wrong, that was my greatest fear but it's not anymore, I mean… it wasn't just about you "taking" her, it was about her choosing someone, you, over me, even then, my greatest fear was about my insecurities, not her and by who's side she'd be happy. I was selfish and the locket saw that,' Ron said slowly and Harry tried not to stare at his friend and the way he spoken, it was happening every few years and this was one of those rare times when Ronald Weasley could open up and show that he was a bit mature.

'I'm glad we're fine with that,' Harry finally said and Ron nodded his head and gave a small smile.

'OK, look, since you've said things to each other, and since you indeed feel like that, I can't do more than tell you to search in her bedroom, in the cabinet of her nightstand for all the answers you need. I can't talk to her, she'll hex us both, me for getting in the way and you for revealing things to me. But I can tell you where to search as to see things that will help you make the next move, you need to have a clear picture of how things are right now so you can decide on how to work out the whole thing…' Ron said and Harry looked at him in curiosity.

'What's in her cabinet?' he asked, he could remember the cabinet of Hermione's nightstand, like he remembered the furniture in her bedroom and the rest of the flat.

'The answers you need, the things that will show you she has her reasons to be afraid…' Ron replied mysteriously and Harry sighed.

'Can we drop the enigmas?' Harry asked in a sigh and Ron nodded with a small smile.

'In the cabinet, there's a gift given by me, she truly needed it, believe me. I wouldn't be telling you about it if I wasn't sure you're good to go and see it. It's about time after all…' Ron only said, Harry was ready to actually snap at his friend for keeping up like that but a man from the team called out for the Keeper for the practice.

'Ok, I have to go now, don't use your name and profession to come back here, I think it's illegal and the last thing I need is my coach screaming at me about such stories in the Prophet. I have enough trouble as it is because of Lavender distracting me.' Ron said and Harry actually grinned and nodded his head before the redhead could pat Harry on the shoulder and move away. Harry was ready to move towards the opposite direction but Ron called Harry's name.

'Don't hurt her, no matter what, don't hurt her, she had enough,' Ron added and before Harry could respond in some way, the redhead rushed close to the man calling him for the practice. Harry felt his stomach dropping slightly; these were almost the same words Ron had spoken two days ago, why he was so afraid Harry would hurt Hermione? Was it because she loved him? Well, if it was that, she had the same power on him and so far had used it twice, first in Italy, after the kiss and then after his injury at the Burrow, two days ago…

Harry didn't waste another minute, checking his watch, he realized it was afternoon already and Hermione would probably have lunch with Ginny and then return to the flat for the rest of the day, she wanted it or not, Ginny had other things to do too than sheltering her friend from her fear of being close to Harry.

He returned to the flat, made sure she was still away, he put an alarm spell on the house in case she was back and he didn't hear her and sneaked inside the bedroom that belonged to her, all the while feeling like a thief for intruding her private space.

He glanced around at the familiar space, full of books, parchments, muggle and Wizarding pictures and he sat close to the nightstand, on the nicely made bed. He looked around once again, feeling guilty as the pictures of hers smiled at the room from the walls and her desktop.

_Get on with it Potter, your curiosity is greater than any feeling of shame, anyway!_ The Harry-ish part of his head shouted inside his mind and he nodded to himself. He put his finger on the small knob of the cabinet and pulled but to his surprise, it didn't open even if it didn't have a lock, she had bewitched it. He frowned, took out his wand and pointed it at the small door.

'_Alohomora!' _ Harry cast the spell and then pulled at the small door once again, it didn't open! 'Fuck this,' He muttered as he pointed his wand again. The small explosive charm made the door turn into fragments, he mentally noted to conjure one later, with a cleaning he cleaned up the dust and pieces of wood and he was finally able to see what the cabinet held inside: a pensive and memories in vials.

Harry hurried, fell on his knees before the nightstand and took out the small pensive, it was smaller than the one in the Headmaster's office at Hogwarts but it was a good one. Harry had to dig his hand deep in the cabinet to take out the box that was in the back of it. He opened it and saw inside a lot of vials, he took out one and read the note on the small paper attached on the glass.

_Good, 1994 achieving the summoning charm. _

Harry smiled slightly, he remembered that time too, when he finally made it to cast the Accio, he took another.

_Bad, 1992 the Basilisk Attack_

She had sorted out her memories in good and bad ones, typical Hermione.

'_The answers you need, the things that will show you she has her reasons to be afraid…' _Ron's words echoed back in his mind so he kept looking through the vials to find something that would explain Ron's cryptic words.

_Good, 1999 NEWTs results_

_Bad, 1997 sending Mom and Dad away_

_Good, 1991 the Hogwarts Letter Arrives_

_Bad, 1990 Primary school kids_

_Bad, 1996 the attack at Hogwarts_

_Bad, 1995 Recovery-Sirius' gone_

_Good, 1998 Australia_

_Bad, 1994 Voldemort returns_

_Good, 1999 entering Healer program_

_"- - -"  
_

Harry stared at the vial with the simple dashes on. The rest of the vials he had checked were pretty clear on their meaning, most memories considered them and as far as he could remember, nothing extraordinary had happened back then to prove something new. But this vial's tag was almost blank, just two rushed dashes were on by Hermione's pen and Harry's instinct decided that this was probably what he was searching for. He put aside the box and the vials he had checked already on the mattress and he opened the vial with the unknown memory, let it fall in the pensive and as he remained on his knees, he put his head as close as possible to the pensive's surface until he felt the old sensation of being pulled inside a memory.

He found himself in the Chamber of Secrets, the last place he expected himself to see in Hermione's memory. He looked around him and saw the huge skeleton of the basilisk, as Ron and Hermione rushed inside the main chamber, it was in the night of the Hogwarts battle, four years ago.

'_You have to stab it, don't wait for a moment, it's all it needs to see inside your heart, just kill it right away.'_ Ron was saying as he took one of the Basilisk's fangs and gave it to Hermione who took a shaky breath and nodded as Ron put the Cup of Hufflepuff on the floor between them as they knelt. Harry felt his heart racing as he remembered the drunken talk he had with Hermione, back on the second of May, where everything started, she hadn't answered his question about the cup.

The Horcrux had shook for a moment that Hermione wasted and the black smoke erupted from within, forming two figures, Harry and Hermione's dancing, like they had done back in the tent, when they were on their own. Both Hermione and Ron had remained watching the figures before Riddle- Harry's figure could look at the Hermione with the fang in her heart. He stopped the dance with the Riddle-Hermione and suddenly started chocking on black blood that soon was also running down his eyes and nose before he had spoken.

'_I will never love you like you do; I will never realize what you've done for me, how can I be with you? When there are more beautiful women out there? I will never notice, I will never care and you will always be in my shadow, always crawling behind me. You realized things when you remained with me, but I won't remain with you, you're not good enough…'_

'_HERMIONE! KILL IT NOW!' _Ron had bellowed and Hermione with tears in her eyes, had finally stabbed the Cup, causing the object and smoke to erupt in an explosion of black magic as a masculine voice was heard screaming in furry. After that the two had remained like that, looking at each other breathless before Ron had crawled close to her sobbing form.

'_You're good enough for me, Hermione…_' Ron had whispered as Hermione cried harder than ever Harry could remember her. His heart was pounding, this was her greatest fear, himself never noticing, never seeing before his nose.

'_Vow you'll never say a word to him,'_ Hermione had told Ron as Harry pulled himself out of the memory as Ron was nodding his head and the two were standing up on their feet.

Harry was back on the floor of Hermione's bedroom a moment later. His eyes staring forward, his vision of the nightstand's top with a picture, a clock and a lamp held no importance as he finally saw what Ron knew and Luna guessed. Hermione had been in love with him ever since the war time, ever since the night Ron left if not even before that.

He finally saw the picture, she was afraid, she had sunk herself into oblivion of her feelings for the past years because he had been hurting her for so long, and now he was giving the wakeup call and frankly, she had every reason not to answer, she had been through a lot, she had tried to get over him, to move on, with Ron and the other blokes she had dated in the past, with her focus on her friendship with Harry, she had desperately tried to forget her love for him.

Harry felt like the biggest idiot for not seeing before, for not noticing and wondering, but on the other hand he knew, he had kept her away unconsciously as to save them both, that's what he thought as the best option for their survival, little had he known he had killed her inside.

He wished he had seen, he wished he had noticed the signs, he wished for a lot of things to be different as now, the fear she was feeling touched his own soul too. The slightest fault and he would indeed bring her to her knees for the final time. He wanted her, he loved her, he wanted to be with Hermione by his side, he wanted her there but her words made him feel guilty for all this.

_'You're the most important person in my life, the person I have been revolving around for so long, and I had gotten used to be like that, because you're Harry, you're the— I have tried so hard to keep the balances, I have tried to be there for you no matter what. And now you're asking me to risk all that, you can't guarantee that we'll make it, it's only wishful thinking. You can't promise me we'll make it, you use your instinct, I use my brain and my brain says you can't guarantee that our friendship won't get screwed up, that I won't lose you._

_' And I prefer to have you like that, like my fucking brother than having you not at all. You're too important to be jeopardized and that's both our fault, for letting it happen, for getting so deep in each other's lives, in each other's hearts, for becoming each other's parts. If I lose you, I won't be able to live and be the same, I made it without the rest, without my parents, without Ron, but I can't do it without you.'_

He had pulled both of them in that sibling status and she had willingly stepped in it because she was too afraid, he couldn't imagine his life without her but she couldn't live without him either and she was right, two days ago: he could give no promise and no reassurance of making it as a couple, he could promise they'd try but he couldn't promise he wouldn't break her and now he knew, one more blow and she'd be done with it.

Ron had asked him not to hurt her, Luna had asked of him to fight for Hermione and Lunahad told him that she was fragile but right now Harry considered her side for the first time, she was trying to protect herself from him and what they could create together. They were both capable of great things if united but still, he couldn't guarantee that he wouldn't hurt her and that made him crawl as well. He always saw her as the strong figure in his life, the one to pull him through, his backbone, but right now he realized also that her only weak, pained side considered him and he was both the medicine and the illness.

As the fear of hurting her even more crept inside him, Harry wondered for the first time, would it be better for them not to get deeper? Would it be better for them to compromise and never move their relationship to the next level? Would they spare themselves the harm if they remained like that? Could he look at her now and see the sister he once thought he was seeing? Should he let her be? Should he stop thinking of a bright future because of the possibility of pain? The risk was huge and now he realized her struggling, parts of each other were at cost here, _they_ were at cost here because neither of them could live away from the other. Hermione had thought she wasn't good enough for him but now he wondered the same thing about himself before her, was he good enough for her?

Was their love worthy such risk?

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*runs away and locks herself in the wardrobe where none can find her* OUCH! the last thing we needed was him to have doubts! darn it! what u think will happen now guys? and what u think of the chapie? we had the cup scene revealed, i always like to use this scene, it's a gap JKR left (like others) that i love to turn into hhr even more and of course i couldn't let the hhr-dancing-movie scene go unnoticed here so i added it too through the locket, now we know why hermione refused, she's been trying to deny things for so long that now she's too afraid to grab for it all, what u think of the luna-harry scene? she's pretty honest and insightful i think and i agree with her word about healthy trees and their fruits, and what about the ron-harry scene? i like ron as a character to an extend and i think that if he's willing to TRY he can be bearable most of the time, if he puts his mind to work

awww ok i want to hear your opinion on this, harry now realized how hermione feels and he doesn't want to harm her more, will this stop them for good?

the deal is always on! reviews=update!

thank you so much for reading

CP09


	11. Punished

_HEEEY you guys! thank you so much for the AMAZING reviews, honestly, when i started this fic, i couldn't imagine the love it would receive and it's all thanks to you :)_

This is a new chapie, the smallest of the story but it had to be like that because it has just a bit of dialog and a lot of struggling so i didn't want to make you feel tired.

My life is hectic right now, my mom returns to greece finally, here in athens at 6 am and i have to be awake to welcome her back, i am hosting a Halloween party and today i made my first Jack pumpkins ever (don't look surprised, we don't celebrate Halloween here in greece) and i cleaned up the entire house because you know how moms are... but i make the new chapie and i'm so happy about it :D

Enjoy...

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Chapter Eleven – Punished_

_August the 20__th__ 2002_

The owl with the letter had woken up Harry that day, and the moment he saw it, through the August morning, he knew something was wrong.

Molly's handwriting had been rushed; probably it was upon her to alert the family members and friends. Minerva McGonagall had passed because of a heart attack and the funeral was already arranged.

Harry was away for the past four days, yet in another mission he had registered himself in; needing more work hours to spend away from _everyone_… so the news of the Headmistress of Hogwarts and old professor of his, having passed had just reached his ears.

Currently, he was putting on his black cloak, the one he had used in the funerals of 1998, a cloak that always reminded him of death and loss as he had it only for such occasions. Up until that morning, he had wondered if he could feel any sadder, the answer had been given to his sorrow.

He hadn't seen Hermione for days, and mostly, it was his decision, his making. When the shock had died down, guilt had crept in, as it always did and Harry had decided at least for now, to give it time, some time, maybe some days? It was already three weeks and his life couldn't be more miserable without her.

One voice in his mind, the Hermione-ish, was screaming about this having no results as they weren't salvaging their friendship, they were actually destroying that too, and the Harry-ish voice of his head was still stubborn, still trying to persuade him that it was a matter of time, that sometimes, doing something is worse than doing nothing and that was the way to go here.

Harry was torn between losing the chance forever and remaining like that, her fears had become his fears and that stopped him from even looking at her. He had promised her he'd try and he knew she was waiting but she didn't know that now, they shared the same demons, the same truth and that made him crawl instead of moving forward.

Hermione had almost moved to the Burrow, spending just a few hours of every day at their flat, mostly as to sleep, and then she was away, with small words of going to help Ginny and Fleur, never giving him the chance even to chicken out of a conversation. And in his part, he had thrown himself in work, working extra hours at the ministry, filling up the paperwork he always hated and getting to the office almost before the Ministry could open its doors for the staff every day, earning the praises of his superiors and a heart more broken than ever.

But his sleep was something he couldn't avoid, even if he slept less hours than ever and even if he was exhausted at the end of every day, his dreams tormented him, screamed at his face all the things he wanted to forget, regret and avoid while he was awake. Hermione was everywhere in his sleep, as if he was a Horcrux of her own soul, dreams of their past, dreams of her holding his hand during their school years, the tears she shed for him in so many occasions, the times she saved him and was saved be him. And then there were dreams of the final days of the Hunt, when she had realized things, and she seemed to him more heartbroken than ever, and then the battle, and how she had screamed when Hagrid had left him on the floor, before Voldemort's feet.

It was as if seeing into a pensive again, as his brain screamed for him to get punished for not seeing before, for not noticing his heart and instinct. There were also dreams about what he was going to lose, if he didn't act, nights of passion and love, days of care and compassion, times of happiness.

And he always woke up sweaty and more exhausted than before the slumber, always with a headache that had nothing to do with his scar anymore but his heart, that felt torn and beaten by his own hands.

And he knew, he knew this was hurting her as well, in the few times he got glimpses of her before some of them could leave, he could see her own black circles under her eyes, her own struggling, her own exhaustion and he tried again and again to make himself believe that giving time and space was the key to their situation.

He hadn't spent so much time away from her, apart the times of him being with the Dursleys, when they hadn't obstacles as these, they were always close, daily, or even when they couldn't, they would find some way to contact with each other. Now, they were distanced, not asking about how they are because they knew both the _answer _and the _cause _of it. Ron was away as well, in the team, playing against the best Quidditch teams, winning and yet not having his friends there because it would be either him or her attending, never both, because they would have to be close.

Hermione had decided not to be attending, choosing to visit her parents, as Harry had learnt from Ginny and George when England had played against Greece. They would have to be close and in public, so Hermione had kept her distance, probably thinking too, that not moving forward was the best solution to their problem.

But today, Harry knew, that she'd be there, at Hogwarts, where the last resting place for Minerva McGonagall was going to be, like Dumbledore's. And Harry knew Hermione wouldn't miss the farewell because McGonagall was her favorite professor, he could imagine her pain; he had felt it too, in 1996, when Dumbledore passed. He was going to actually see her, not take glimpses and muffled words, he was going to be close to her, like the rest of the Weasleys and the rest of the attending friends as the British Wizarding ministry had declared this day as one of mourning for the woman who didn't only hold Hogwarts open during the second War but also developed it afterwards, when the new generation was still afraid and wary.

Molly's letter was pretty clear about all this information, he hadn't even been to the ministry as he had returned straight home from Guatemala and he would go to the office that morning, now the plans were changed and he was apparating at the Burrow with a loud crack.

The next moment a lot of people screaming questions from the perimeter were heard but Harry ignored all the journalists and reporters and got inside the Burrow, where he was greeted by a kitchen full of black clothed people. He got inside, greeted Molly, Arthur, Fleur and Ron who were closer and as he glanced at the rest of the kitchen he noticed that Hermione wasn't there.

'She's in the living room with Ginny, she's seriously devastated, I didn't know she would take it so bad.' Ron said as he noticed Harry's searching eyes, Harry nodded and he was ready to move there, in instinct, wanting to support her but Molly called for everyone to floo at Hogwarts because it was time and apparating in the garden with all these people gathered for questions wasn't ideal.

Hermione showed up, glanced at Harry like he did for an endless moment and then she flood away without a word along Luna who was there as well, this time, maybe the first time, in casual, Wizarding clothes for the day. Harry sighed and followed George to the floo.

When they were all flood to Hermione's quarters, the place connected with the Burrow for that day, they all moved out of the small common room in silence. In his way out, Harry glanced at the couch they had fallen asleep together, months ago, the night Crookshanks died, and even if he felt like a jerk for having his mind so far away from the passing of Minerva's, he longed the proximity he had with Hermione, the proximity he always had with her.

They moved through the castle, Harry between George and Ron with Lavender at the right side of the bunch they all made and Hermione at its end, sniffing and sobbing as quietly as she could manage with Luna supporting her with an arm around her shoulders. They moved out to the grounds and Harry was shocked to see tens of people that had arrived and still moved inside, gathering around the place that the funeral would take place, they would soon form hundreds of people. There were a few tens of chairs that certainly wouldn't be enough for everyone as generations of students were arriving from the gates and the castle, the chairs were for people like them and the rest of the War heroes as Arthur informed in a hushed voice.

They approached, thankfully someone had taken care of the journalists and reporters not being allowed to get inside the grounds so they were far away to disturb. They took their seats, close to the lonely tomb of Dumbledore that would soon be accompanied by Minerva's and they waited. Again, Hermione made sure to stay a few chairs away from Harry as Ron with Lavender and Ginny with Dean sat between them, Harry sighed as he saw Hermione sniffing and muffling her sobs while Ginny tried but didn't succeed on calming her down.

The funeral started, with the centaurs showing up and carrying the coffin, everyone stood up in respect, the mermaid people showed up as well, the water to their waists as they held up their weapons in sign of respect. Everyone remained quiet as the centaurs stopped by Dumbledore's tomb and let the coffin lie there, a moment later it was covered by marble almost identical to the one that held safe the corpse of Dumbledore. The centaurs raised their bows in the air and let loose of the arrows that exploded into countless little lights as Minister Norton took his place close to the tombs as to give the eulogy.

His words seemed empty, decided, rehearsed as he talked about Minerva's character, as far as Harry knew, he wasn't even a student at Hogwarts, he was coming from Beauxbatons Academy and now he was talking about Minerva as if he knew her personally when it was known around the Wizarding world about his rival with her ever since he became a minister and tried to cut a lot of funds to the school.

Harry sighed, he hated political games and McGonagall would hate them too, if she knew that right now they were played with her tomb as the table for them. His eyes felt like burning as he remembered her stern glances and frowns, her words that kept him on his feet and place whether he was losing his focus. Her scolding when he had decided not to take potions as the subject and her determination for him to be an auror even if this would be the last thing she would achieve, he was proud that she had done that and so much more.

He smiled sadly as he remembered his Nimbus 2000, her gift to him, one of the most precious gifts in his heart along the letter that summoned him to his first Quidditch practice. Her proud smile the times the Gryffindor team took the school cup, her furious eyes when he had fought with Malfoy in sixth year and then her sad eyes when she talked about Sirius when everyone thought that he had betrayed Harry's parents.

Minerva McGonagall held a role of great importance in every student's life. Harry could remember Hermione's boggard and how sad she had looked when Minerva had been disappointed her the night of troll in the bathroom, Hermione's smile every time Minerva praised her or given her points for their house, every time she was there to help the trio or on the other hand, scold and shout at them when they had misbehaved.

And with those thoughts, Harry looked around him and saw the sorrow in everyone's eyes. Students of other years, earlier and later, grown people, of any age, current Hogwarts students in their uniforms, his own friends, the Weasleys were all there in sorrow. Ron was holding Lavender, Arthur was holding Molly like Fleur was supporting Bill and Dean was keeping Ginny close, even Luna was supporting Seamus. And with sadness, Harry realized that only he and Hermione were left like that, alone, standing before the funeral of a person equally important to both.

He wouldn't keep up like that, before death, even friends so stubborn and stupid have to unite and support each other, he decided to comfort her like she had done when she had reassured him of Dumbledore, when his eyes had closed at her very touch. He moved closer, passing before Ron, Lavender, Dean and Ginny, he stood before her as her eyes caught sight of him and with no word, he wrapped his arms around her delicate frame, a single moment later, she was wrapping her own arms around him and they held each other tightly as the tears fell, feeling the puzzle pieces clicking into place.

'I'm here for you…' he whispered and he meant it with all his heart as he closed his eyes and felt her body shaking with the sobs and he rubbed his hand on her back all the while realizing that this game wouldn't lead somewhere.

It wasn't about their friendship anymore, it was already changed they wanted it or not, now it was about either being together or totally apart, they were already experiencing the one thing they were both afraid of happening to them, being away from each other.

Harry knew, when there's something you really want, you have to fight for it, you shouldn't give up no matter how hard it seems. And even if you've lost hope, ask yourself if ten years from now, you're going to wish you gave it just one more shot. Because the best things in life, they don't come free. And he knew what he wanted in ten years, he wanted to have Hermione there, with him, in all forms and shapes she could be by his side, he wanted her forever.

Dumbledore had once told him that the time comes, when we have to choose between what is right and what is easy, and he was done choosing wrong in this. He had punished himself enough, he had been through a lot already, now he was back in the game, back to take it all, back to make Hermione see if she still couldn't do it herself.

He had no reason to keep up like this, even if the fear of hurting her and not standing up to the expectations made him crawl, he knew that he was hurting her already, he was falling in her eyes already as instead of trying, he was running away from her when he had promised the opposite. And he wasn't going to keep up like that, he had said "I love you" for the first time to her and he fully meant it, he had kissed her with all the love and all the honesty he had felt and he didn't want to keep regretting a fallen friendship and him never trying.

This was Hermione and himself, it was now or never and Harry decided, he was going to make it, he was going to be all the things he wanted to be by her side.

He didn't want to die like that, like Minerva and Albus, with people around him mourning for someone who achieved a lot in society but left behind him no family and no children. He wanted, ten years from that moment, to return home, a place where love was waiting for him, a love achieved because he tried, because he succeeded and he wanted someone dear to his heart to share all this love with.

He wanted a life that he would be part of and not just a bystander.

'And I won't leave,' he added or heard himself doing so and the slight nod she gave made him feel important, it gave him the knowledge of still having time to prove her that they could make it, that he was going to fight for her no matter what…

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OOK someone found the guts to act! thank Merlin! the story is close to the end guys, as you can imagine... it will be either harry taking it all... or... *don't even want to think about it!*

what u think of the chapie? i know, small and with no much dialog as i warned but Harry had A LOT to think about and... I killed Minerva ouch, but i wanted to give her justice because she has taken little credit on how important she was to everyone, usually overshadowed from Dumbledore's part in the story... so what u think? harry stood up to the expectations and he comforted Hermione as he had to and she needed him to, and she nodded her little pretty head so... she expected this? she wanted this? you tell me in a review :)

the deal is always on! reviews=updates!

thank you very much for reading

CP09


	12. All or Nothing

_OOK guys! here's a HUGE chapter! the last one was kinda small but this one is a beast, seriously, i would have updated sooner but yesterday i had to donate blood for a friend's dad's heart surgery and then i was feeling kinda weak to write but i finished it tonight (yep it's 03.06 am and i have to be up at 08.30am for college) so i made it to update just now, please forgive some errors since i'm half asleep on the keyboard lol_

ENJOY...

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Chapter Twelve – All Or Nothing _

_September 19__th__ 2002_

She was so frustrated, she was so tired and frustrated, it had been a month ever since the funeral, when he had took her in his arms and ever since, he had been distant again, maybe not awkward and muted but distant for sure.

Had he regretted his words at the funeral like he obviously had forgotten his words after the match and his injury at the Burrow? He had promised he'd fight for them but so far, only a hug in a time of needed comfort was all she got. Had he decided to listen to her, about remaining friends and nothing more? She afraid so.

She knew she was selfish, she was the one asking him not to keep up, she was the one who held them back, who demanded of him to fight now, she was the one who turned him down twice, one after the kiss and the other after his clear declaration of his feelings, so why she was so confused and annoyed by him giving her what she wanted, what she clearly asked for?

She knew the answer, she always did, she loved him, with all her heart, with all her soul. She loved him and indeed, she wanted him to try and fight, like she had done, but this time, she wanted one of them to make it, not to fail, she wanted to see him trying, she wanted to see him wanting something so much that he'd fight for it, for them.

She had told him they could fail, indeed they could, but they could also succeed, she knew, they were different, they were unique actually, yet her brain had scared her away from her heart's desire, the times she followed her brain, she lost, yet, to the rest, she was advantaged to have such brain so maybe, she should have trust it, she should not feel the pain of her wrong maybe, for once, she should follow her heart, she should grab and take it all, as she deserved, as _he_ deserved as well. Sometimes, she was feeling right, she shouldn't destroy their friendship, it might seemed changed if not destroyed now, but she should try for it, and some other times, the times she allowed none to see, she cried for her stubbornness, for her cowardice, for hurting him when she's the key to his happiness.

She wasn't a fool or ignorant, she knew it was her and him now, none else, she had no reason to get jealous of anyone around him, she knew him, when he was committed and loyal to something or someone, he'd be like that to the end, yet she was still afraid.

'If you don't answer my question this time too, I'm calling the healers.' Ginny's voice broke the train of her thought and Hermione looked at the redhead who was pointing her wand up to a banner with the big words HAPPY BIRTHDAY HERMIONE at the kitchen's Burrow. She hated surprises so if they wanted so desperately to throw a party for her, she would be the one to help with it. 'Is it alright there or higher?' Ginny asked and Hermione smiled slightly and nodded her head.

'It's just fine.' Hermione replied finally and Ginny nodded and made a sharp movement with her wand for the banner to remain up in the air.

'You know you could just throw yourself in his arms and get done with all this.' Ginny blurted out and Hermione's head snapped at her friend's direction, Ginny knew, of course she did, they were friends for years, there was no point in hiding behind their fingers.

'Well I don't want to steal your method,' Hermione said with a small smile and Ginny shrugged with a small smile of her own, remembering that evening in 1996, when everything had been so much easier when the roles were different because there were rules set for them.

'Well it had worked for the time being,' Ginny said and Hermione grinned for a moment but then sobered up. Ginny probably noticed her friend's mood and sighed.

'I'm sure he's preparing something, Harry's not the type of guy who gives up that easily, let alone that he never really listens to you when it's about rules… so maybe, you should just be patient.' Ginny said and Hermione sighed with her turn.

'I've been waiting for the past six weeks, Gin, I think his silence pretty much screams out his decision and the worst thing is that it's me who drove him away.' Hermione said and sighed again as she tried for the umpteenth time to tie a small ribbon but gave up, took her wand and cast the spell that obviously made the job easier.

'I think you just need to wait,' Ginny tried again and Hermione decided not to look at her.

'And I think I have to compromise with my decisions,' Hermione said and she heard Ginny sighing too but they didn't have more time to talk as Lavender burst inside the kitchen with her hands full of bags with more decorations, causing the other two to groan and complain about the whole deal.

The preparations went on, with Molly helping like she always did when preparing the party of one of her children, biological or not, but Hermione's mind was away, like it had been for the past six weeks.

She was supposed to have gotten what she asked for, she was supposed to be satisfied with the current situation, even if he had promised to "spoil" their "sibling-like" relationship, he backed off, he didn't push her more, because honestly she wasn't sure if she could have made it to stop him, she wasn't sure of herself anymore.

A small part of her wondered why she should stop him at all, why she didn't give in, but then, the insecurities, the past, the already fallen try with Ron and her own fears kicked in and brought her back in her place, she had compromised with mediocre and sometimes, it stops feeling like an aching sense and becomes the next best thing, and now that she had the chance for all of it, she was too afraid.

She had wondered at the first days after his injury, what he was going to do to persuade her, but the days that passed with him working more than ever and her running away proved her that nothing was going to happen, on one hand she blamed him for not trying, on the other hand, she blamed herself for not remaining in the same room with him for more than five minutes for all these days.

And then it was the funeral, where he hugged her tightly, where she felt like the world was right as his arms had wrapped around her frame and he had whispered that he'd be there for her, and he wouldn't leave, but he had done nothing once again, for the past month, he had been distant. And she had expected of him to act, to say something more and she had expected herself to act as well, she hadn't been sure how, probably it would have depended on what he would have done.

Maybe, she would have turned him down once again, or maybe, just maybe, the things he would have done would made the trick and she'd finally give them a shot, hoping for the best, maybe with him, she would defy her fears and demons and she would make it, for him, with him.

She knew she hadn't done her best with anyone else in her life, she always did her best for Harry, for his safety, for his happiness, for his life, she wasn't sure why this now was different but she knew that she hadn't done her best for anyone else.

And he had done his best for her too, to protect her, to save her, to respect and care for her. They did their best in times like the fight at the Department of Mysteries, when she fell and he kept up, they did their best even when she broke his wand and they kept up with him not wanting to make her feel bad, even if indeed, it was an accident that she blamed herself over. They always did their best for each other, from the times they danced to Muggle music in the tent somewhere in the middle of nowhere up to the day they past their problems and he hugged her tightly as to comfort her. So why didn't he try once more? If he did, maybe, she could give him what he wanted.

The time passed by and she suddenly found herself getting ready in Ginny's bedroom, changing from her jeans and shirt to a dress Ginny had forced her to buy for the occasion. Ron would bring her parents from Essex since she had asked him and not Harry to do the job this time, usually Harry was the one most comfortable before her parents and the Muggle London in general but this year, this time, she wasn't feeling comfortable talking to the man she knew for more than ten years, the man who was her best friend and the man she loved, stupid indeed, but true as well.

'And now the makeup,' Ginny said as she got inside and smiled at Hermione who just sighed, not sure if denying would work out with Ginny Weasley. 'Oh come on, Hermione, bright up, it's your birthday and in our birthday we have to be happy and bright so we can have the candle wish come true,' Ginny said over excitedly, causing Hermione to look at her oddly. After all these weeks of struggling with herself, Hermione didn't even have the power to defy her friend's words about pretending the happy one just because of a date in the calendar so she remained silent and closed her eyelids for Ginny to put on the shadow she had chosen for her friend.

Harry had just arrived at the Burrow, with the small box in his hand and himself currently occupied in Molly's suffocating hug. When he was released Molly framed his face and smiled at him.

'I'm so glad you're finally here, we all missed you,' Molly said and patted Harry's cheeks with her hands, Harry smiled and nodded.

'I know and I'm so sorry but I was really busy the past days, I promise I'll stick around. Where are the rest?' he asked as he looked around the kitchen and found only the very pregnant Fleur trying some chocolate.

'All in the living room, Ron is to bring Hermione's parents here and we'll be set.' Molly informed him and Harry nodded, he had kind of expected Hermione to ask him of bringing Mr. and Mrs. Granger once again for her birthday at the Burrow, like he had been doing for the past years after the war but this year she hadn't asked him and he hadn't offered, too busy to get himself ready for that specific evening, at the thought, he held the gift in his hands tighter as he got inside the living room and gotten greeted by everyone around the room, the birthday girl and Ginny along with Ron and the Grangers were not there yet.

Harry found a seat and took it next to Luna who had chosen a bright yellow dress for that night, up to that moment he was talking about something with Hannah Longbottom but turned around and looked at Harry with a smile.

'Ready to strike?' she asked and Harry smiled nervously, only now allowing his confidence to get overshadowed by nervousness and worry. He nodded his head quickly and smiled at Luna who was the only one knowing of his plan.

'I think I am,' Harry finally said the moment the room flashed green with the floo being activated and the Granger showing up with Ron holding their hands between them. They entered the room, both Jane and Edward Granger holding a gift each for their daughter and they got greeted by everyone once again, already having become family with the Weasleys, the Lovegoods and Harry.

'How are you my dear boy?' Jane asked Harry as she hugged him in a motherly hug.

'I'm great,' Harry croaked at the thought of Hermione's father who now was smiling at him from behind his wife would soon be seeing the gift given to her daughter by Harry.

He shook hands with Edward who smiled oblivious and patted his back but he turned around when he heard Jane actually squealing and running towards the stairs that led upstairs, at the bottom Hermione was standing with a smile that actually reached her eyes as her mother hugged her only child tightly both women dressed in beautiful dresses of rich blue colors, their favorite. Hermione returned the hug and looked at Harry for a moment from her mother's shoulder, the smile didn't waver and Harry returned it with one of his own as if her happiness was contagious to him, she smiled, he smiled, she crawled, he followed…

Soon Hermione was the center of attention and Harry waited in his black robes for the rest to give her their gifts and wish for her the best, all the gifts were opened by her and he was the last one to approach her. After the few moments of awkwardness, he hugged her tightly, his arms wrapping around her waist and back protectively and for a few moments, the room went silent and unmoving, or so he thought and the world contained only him and her in his arms with her hair close to his face and her own arms wrapped around his shoulders as tightly.

After a few moments they broke off and smiled at each other, honestly, purely, happily as he handed her the gift, the wrapping paper was a faint pink and the ribbon was silver. Hermione smiled and took it, she glanced at him as she ripped the paper and untied the ribbon that held the lace around it, inside, there was a simple box, she opened it and her eyes watered as she first stared at the content, then looked around her at the rest who were actually watching and then at Harry who as well, who was waiting for her response with her heart racing.

Inside the box, there were the two roses she had thrown in the seawater of Italy that night, when they shared a kiss, in his own birthday, the roses remained in perfect condition due to the spell she had cast on them herself. Harry had picked them up and saved them. Along the two roses that were given to her once more, there was a small vial between them, its liquid changing color again and again from bright silver to black, having all the colors in between.

'This is what took me so long…' Harry whispered as Hermione looked at the small vial. He had decided to make it, to have it all and he had needed a plan, a plan formed and executed by him and a couple of people's help, Hermione's mother and Luna were the best people to help him to win Hermione's heart and keep it his.

He had thought of a lot of plans, one of them was jealousy but he knew, he had hurt her enough, having her more sad and angry wouldn't solve anything when he needed to make her see that she was the one for him and none else, he didn't want to start something –if he started anything- at the wrong way.

And then, he had decided that a simple, clear projection of facts would have Hermione convinced, it was Hermione after all, she needed facts for her brain to accept the things her heart felt and wanted from the beginning.

Some notes, letters or even some hollowers had been considered but then, he had decided that if he realized some things through a pensive himself, Hermione could do the same. So he had gathered help and strength from Jane Granger and Luna Lovegood and he had needed an entire month and a lot of exhausting nights and days of working with Legilimency, sewing together memories and putting them in the order he wanted for Hermione to see, then he had cast a lot of spells in the mix to have that multi-memory accessible to two people at the same time.

'What is this?' Hermione finally asked with a small voice and Harry approached even more and spoke in the same small voice, the room still frozen for them around them.

'It's something I want to show you, I'm not good with words and I have already told you _some_ things, I kissed you so this is my last chance, I don't know what else to do, Hermione,' Harry said with all the honesty he had and Hermione almost felt ashamed for causing him such grief.

'Show me,' she finally said and the two didn't even need to tell the rest they would need some time, it was as if everyone –maybe Hermione's father excluded- had been waiting for the two to finally meet and exchange actual words with each other. Harry took her hand this time and they apparated away, knowing that announcing things to the rest were meaningless as everyone had been watching. Hermione had still in her hands the box of her gifts as they showed up in the flat they shared with Ron.

They showed up in the living room, where Harry had the pensive he had paid a lot of money to buy, three days ago. He had everything prepared for her to see what he wanted to show and Hermione could only give him the vial that he opened and emptied in the basin.

Hermione let the box with the flowers in the couch and Harry held the hand of hers he was still holding, looked at her once again and then touched the basin's surface with his fingertip, having them both pulled inside the memories.

_A very young Harry was locked inside a small cupboard under the stairs; the two figures of Harry and Hermione were almost bended inside the cupboard as not to step on the small boy who was trying to see through the door's small window. _

'_YOU'RE AN ERROR OF NATURE AND YOU'LL STAY THERE UNTIL TOMORROW!' a man shouted and Hermione could imagine that was Harry's uncle, Vernon Durlsey, she felt her heart tightening at the sight of the little Harry tearing up and muffling the sound of his sobs in his pillow as he hugged it tightly._

_The memory changed in a spin of color and the next thing they saw was Harry and Ron inside the wagon of Hogwarts Express, that moment a very young and bossy Hermione got inside the wagon and the older Hermione saw how Harry had looked at her back then, oblivious that this girl would one day be his best friend and so much more. She noticed how much entranced she was from the beginning with Harry and how she didn't waste a moment to introduce herself, something she hadn't done so easily before, during her Muggle education since she was an outcast. _

_The memory changed again and the huge Wizarding chessboard showed up, their little versions were talking about Bravery and Friendship and More Important things that she never had the time to tell him about as she launched herself in his arms, for the first time that was meant to be followed by many more. _

_The scenery changed again and Hermione found herself looking at her petrified form on a bed, her face etched with shock and fear, she glanced at the grown Harry next to her and she saw the grief she noticed in the younger form of his as he had just entered the infirmary and was looking at the girl on the bed in a similar fashion, scared and shock of what happened to her. _

_The next moment the memory was changed again and she saw herself crying over Harry's unconscious form after the Quidditch match and the dementors in third year, she had confessed to Harry her worries a month and a half ago and now she was seeing herself crying over one of the very few times she hadn't been able to save him as she always tried to do. _

_The memories changed again and again, from the time they saved Sirius and he told her that she's the brightest witch of their age, the kiss she gave Harry after the end of the fourth year, to the moment she fell in the Department of Mysteries in their fifth year, since she had been unconscious she hadn't seen how Harry had acted above her, completely lost and scared as she noticed now. They kept moving through the memories, she saw herself trying to sort things out after that difficult sixth year that was etched with confusion and annoyance at everything from their parts and then the memories of the Hunt started. _

_She saw herself being hugged by Ron as Harry didn't have the time to do the same as he wanted when she talked about her parents being sent to Australia. She saw the book about helping your ways with witches Ron gave to Harry and she realized just then why Ron had made it to be a bit nicer and more considerate, due to a manual. _

'_I don't mean to make Ron look bad, I just want to show you that you and I are different, I can be a brick but I don't use books,' Harry told her softly next to her and she nodded as their hands had been more tightly clasped with one another than ever before. _

_The memory that made her frown was the one of the Trio splitting in the tent, she saw Ron wrenching the chain of the Locket away from his neck, finally being away from its power but still acting like that, against his friends._

'_I get it, you choose him…' he had said to her and then exited the tent, not giving her the time to explain something, anything and at the same time giving her the moment of realization she had needed… The memory changed once again and she saw herself dancing with Harry, as if nothing was wrong in the world, back in that tent, when they had needed somehow to suppress their pain and she could remember, these moments were one of the best in her life as a few days prior she had set her priorities and even if he couldn't return her feelings back then, she was somehow glad to be the one who remained, she had hope. _

_And then the scene changed again and she found herself shivering at the cold Christmas night at the graveyard of Godric's Hollow, she felt her eyes burning with unshed tears as her younger self conjured the wreath of roses and set it before Harry's parents. Harry squeezed her hand tighter and she looked at him once again. She could see the tears in his own eyes and in instinct she hugged him with one arm and he did the same, just like their youngest selves were doing in the memory at that moment as they exited the graveyard from the kissing-gate and the memory changed once again in something Hermione didn't expect. _

_The next thing she saw the night of locket, how the Riddle-Harry and the Riddle- Hermione showed up before Ron who looked at his worst. _

'_You're nothing, nothing, nothing to him!' Hermione's form accused and then turned around and kissed the form of Harry's who wrapped his own arms around the female form. Ron screamed and hit the locket, destroying it but then he advanced on Harry as well who tried to save himself and told him the one thing that hurt her the most. That she was like a sister to him, she knew about what he had said, he had confessed so in the 2__nd__ of May, but now it hurt as well. _

'_I thought this was the truth, after a point, the rules and the people around us had this being the truth we wanted it or not,' Harry said by her side as the memory changed and she felt herself nodding her head as his arm tightened noticeably around her waist, not sure what she was going to see now._

_The Chamber of Secrets was huge and the dead basilisk was laying where she remembered it to be. Her heart started racing and she looked at Harry who remained calmed and looked deep in her eyes, how could he have known? Who informed him? Only one person knew about this… she felt her eyes filling with tears as she thought the truth was still hidden. _

''_I will never love you like you do; I will never realize what you've done for me, how can I be with you? When there are more beautiful women out there? I will never notice, I will never care and you will always be in my shadow, always crawling behind me. You realized things when you remained with me, but I won't remain with you, you're not good enough…'__ the cup-Harry had told her and even now, that she knew this had changed, her heart felt the pain she had felt back then, the desperation, the shame. _

The memory changed again but instead of being plunged in one more, she found herself back in the living room, out of breath and still with Harry's arm around her waist. Before any of the things or the questions could rise up in her mind, one thing did.

'Did you realize that you have feelings because somehow you found out about the cup?' she asked with a trembling voice, she knew Harry had done this pensive for a reason but her insecurities and the fact of him knowing about something he wasn't supposed to, made her have the wrong conclusions.

Harry shook his hands quickly as he saw where she led herself quickly. All he wanted was to show her the things he couldn't speak out loud because there was nothing more to be said, he was laying open before her and she'd choose what to do with him.

'No, listen to me before this gets worse than better,' Harry tried and held her close, he could see she was tensed but didn't move away, giving him finally the space to talk, it was all or nothing for both of them right that moment.

'I have been having these feelings for a long time now, I'm not sure since when, I always felt awkward when men were around you, when Ron was around you. I never wanted anyone else but you two and then just you in my life and the Hunt and then I didn't succeed to have one normal relationship with someone else because the comparisons and the examples of you were everywhere.

'Some months ago, when we had that reunion, I realized how comfortable I feel around you, when we talked about what kind of people we deserve, what kind of people make us happy, I realized this was you but I didn't allow myself to accept it, it was too much. Until the night we got drunk, I had asked you about the cup and you had avoided the question, I always wondered what happened to you that night but Ron never answered either and I was intoxicated that night to push more.

'So you decided to steal a pensive,' Hermione tried, still angry at him for knowing, still angry for herself being exposed. Harry sighed and this time put her hands around her face so they could focus on each other.

'Hermione, honestly, just listen to me, please,' Harry tried and Hermione nodded after a moment. 'I knew that something changed that night, I had seen us kissing through the locket but that night, I wondered how your lips tasted, how wrong or right it would be to have you as something more. But that scared me even more, the evening with Teddy opened my eyes, we had talked about falling in love with bright examples of us and Teddy was right, we needed nothing more.

'The day you told me about Seamus I lost it, I hadn't admitted things to myself but I knew that none else could have you apart me, I always felt protective of you, I always felt sick when you kissed or hugged or dated someone, I always felt awkward and I knew I shouldn't be feeling like that for someone that was to be something like a sister to me, I should act like Ron did with Ginny and Dean for example, but I always swallowed my tongue and watched with that uncomfortable feeling in my stomach.

'The past months have been Hell for both of us but I'm tired of this, because these months showed at least to me that I can't live without you, I tried to compromise, when I saw your memory of the cup, I tried to compromise because I realized why you were so scared but I can't do this anymore, Hermione.

'You told me of love and important things, you kissed and hugged me first, you showed affection when the rest showed rejection and jealousy. Your touch comforted me and your knowledge helped me, you were the one to remain and I was the one to help and understand you, even if I knew the house elves would never be freed, I tried to be better for you, as not to disappoint you, not make you sad, but I didn't do it with effort. Becoming better for you and eventually for me comes natural when you're considered.

'And I want to keep up like that, I want to become better and better by your side, for once in my bloody life, I want it all, I want you, I want all of you, forever, you and me, every day, like always, only now love and passion and a future included…' Harry said all the things he wanted in a breath, the things he had been dying to say for the past month if not years…

His hands were still holding her face tenderly, his eyes were still locked with hers as they bored in each other's orbs, emerald green and chocolate brown melting with each other and melting all the walls, the fears and the troubles between them.

Hermione remained with her eyes looking into his for a moment more, she had heard all the things he said, all the things he needed to say and she could see in his eyes he was telling her the truth, this is how he felt.

She wanted to feel angry for him wasting so much time, she wanted to feel sad for the time lost, she wanted to feel like the coward who would take the blame, she wanted to feel happy for the opportunity that finally arrived and she wanted to feel guilty for having rejected him twice already, but she knew, this was what she had needed, to see the truth, both hers and his, she needed to see the facts of them never separating. She needed to see Harry's side because she already knew hers, she loved him.

'Please say something,' Harry finally whispered, his heart was dropping to his stomach and his stomach was going crazy with the butterflies as they remained like that, looking at each other's eyes, searching desperately for the next move. The moment he felt her hands on his own hands that held her face pulling, taking them away from her soft cheeks he felt his heart stopping as she was obviously trying to take away his touch from her skin.

A moment later, she was taking his hands and placing them around her waist and back and they moved there and held her close on their own accord as her own arms wrapped around his shoulders and this time, she kissed him.

With all her heart and all her soul, she poured in that kiss all the things she wanted to say, scream and whisper to him and the response she got was all she needed to keep up with her hands caressing his shoulders and arms as he responded with passion and love, one of his hands moved back in her mane, like he had done in Italy while the other on the smaller of her back, pushing her body to his as the temperature in the room raised within heartbeats and the kiss became more and more passionate.

Hermione knew that sometimes the past is something you just can't let go of. And sometimes the past is something we'll do anything to forget. And sometimes we learn something new about the past that changes everything we know about the present, this is what was happening to them now, the past had finally been revealed and the truth was out, they were out in the light and they could only show their true colors to each other, their true feelings.

The kiss broke in a mutual gasp as the two remained half an inch from each other, their eyes glancing at each other's gasping lips. They had nothing to say for now, their hands were already working on each other's clothes as Hermione's hand was tugging at Harry's robed like he did with the end of her dress. Their lips met once again and this time passion took over completely.

He couldn't believe it, he wanted it, hoped for it, he dreamed of it, more times that he could count but right now, he couldn't believe he was actually kissing Hermione in a battle of domination with their tongues, he couldn't believe he was caressing her thigh beneath her beautiful dress or that his hand was feasting into her locks while her hands played with his own hair.

He was in heaven, with their bodies collided and their breath stolen by each other's lips, he was in heaven as she backed him towards the sofa but he stopped her, they couldn't do this on a sofa, this was their first time and it was her birthday, he was going to be the gentleman, how his fuzzed mind made it to command him all these things in such a moment he would never know as he started guiding her to her bedroom without breaking the passionate hug and kiss.

Her breath was stolen, she couldn't breathe easily through her nostrils but she didn't care, she was in his arms, his lips were upon hers and all she could feel was being loved and right with this, finally, all the insecurities were gone and only love and passion and care were here for them. She wasn't sure when they entered her bedroom or when her knees were bending as she felt the side of her bed, she only collapsed on the mattress with Harry following her, landing above her and only then they broke the kiss for the much needed oxygen.

As they panted, they stared in each other's eyes, he thought of asking is she was sure or ready but he didn't, partly he was afraid of the answer and partly he really couldn't stop anymore, he was done waiting and deep down, he knew she was done with all the wrong doings as well.

'I love you,' Harry whispered and he didn't expect an answer as he captured her lips again with his own. Since they had fallen on the bed he was between her legs already and he was certain of two things, she could feel his desire for her and he could seriously stay there with her forever.

The kiss deepened and his hands started caressing her sides and soon he was touching one breast above the dress, making her moan against his lips and arch her body to his touch, encouraging him with her passion as her hands didn't stay idle and they tried successfully to take off his dress robes and start abandoning his shirt, making it in remarkable speed as his shoulders were finally naked for her hands to caress and tease.

He groaned her name against her lips as her fingers grazed against one male nipple and almost in instinct he squeezed her breast more firmly coaxing another moan of pleasure from her.

To her dismay, his hand left her breast and even a part of hers was still unable to believe that she was actually beneath Harry, she felt like screaming in joy. His hands traveled down her body and felt her dress being lifted; the cool air of the room making her shiver as her dress revealed her slightly sweated skin.

The dress was soon revealing her thighs, her underwear, her stomach and then her lacy bra, Harry could feel all the blood leaving his brain as he took off her dress and tossed it carelessly away and a moment later his lips were kissing her collarbone, leaving trails of fire in their path, he wasn't sure whose wandless magic was but her tights, his socks, their shoes and her bra were gone and soon his lips were enveloping one of her nipples, making Hermione moan loudly and her hands to massage his head, keeping him there as his hand cupped her other breast and took care of it while her eyes drifted close.

She opened them again when she felt his lips moving away from her nipple and his hand pausing, she looked at him almost worried that he regretted something but she saw him only staring at a small part of her skin, close to her heart.

'It's Dolohov's,' she whispered and Harry nodded, both of them remembering the pensive they had watched a few minutes before with her falling by the Death Eater's wand in the ministry.

He decided not to go feeling guilty as Hermione always commanded him and destroy what they finally had here, he kissed her scar and then returned his attention on her nipple, blowing cool air on her moistened skin, making her shiver all over and moan his name.

He desperately wanted to keep up worshiping her body but his erection was actually painful in his boxers and since only their underwear was separating them, the soft inside of her thighs was caressing his sides and waist as she tried to worship his own body with her entire form. He moved upwards and captured her lips with his once again as he gridded his body against hers, causing both to moan and sigh after the broken kiss, the friction was mind-blowing.

'Please, Harry… make love to me,' Hermione whispered the words Harry had wanted to hear for so long, he kissed her lips again and one hand supported him above her as the other moved down the side of her body while her own hands moved close to the waistband of his boxers, she pulled at his underwear first, and he moved his waist just a bit for her to lower his boxers down his thighs before she could finish the job with her toes as he nestled back between her legs. He sighed almost in alleviation as his member was free but he greeted his teeth as it touched her still clothed core, he couldn't wait any longer and he certainly wasn't as patient or skillful to take off her underwear with her legs wrapped around his waist, with a wave of his hand her underwear was gone and they both gasped at the immediate contact of skin.

Harry looked back at Hermione and their eyes locked as she could feel his member caressing her center. The slight nod was enough for him to lower his face and start kissing her neck while she wrapped her arms around his shoulders again to steady herself. She felt his member touching her entrance and with a deep thrust, he was buried inside of her, she stiffened for a moment at the size and intensity of the moment.

'Just give me a moment to adjust, it's been a long time…' Hermione gasped in his ear and the tender kiss on her own earlobe was the answer he could give at that moment as he felt like being in heaven, she was so warm and wet and welcoming and he had finally found his home, his place to be, the hug he deserved, the woman he loved, he finally had it all, he was home.

He moaned her name as a few moments later, she moved her hips in the way to show him he was good to go and he withdrew only to trust back inside her, making both gasp and moan as he took his face away from her neck so he could look at her while they made love for the first time.

His gaze upon her captivated her soul, his body was loving her like no man had ever done so before, they were not each other's firsts but she knew, they'd be each other's lasts, his body was so firm, so strong yet protective and reassuring as he kept thrusting deep inside her own body and she could feel his muscles tightening and loosening with every thrust under her caressing fingertips. Her senses were in overdrive, her lips still tasting his flavor of pumpkin pie, had he grabbed a bite before the party? Her touch was on fire and overwhelmed by his presence around her, on her, _inside_ of her, her sight could be focused only on those emerald eyes that pierced through her soul and her ears could hear only his pants and her own moans, the collision of skin against skin and the small squeaks her bed gave as he quickened his thrusts and sent a new set of chills down her spine. Her nostrils could catch his scent, this mix of the muggle cologne she had chosen for him years ago and this Harry-ish scent of fresh air, pumpkin pie and wet ground, a scent so familiar yet so overly refreshing.

'Oh Harry…' Hermione moaned his name once again but this time his name was sound like the sweetest music into his ears, she had called out his name in so many occasions over the years but this time it sounded better than ever with all the love and pleasure and passion she had for him unfolded, given to him as a gift after so long, a reward of risking and trying.

Her scent, the sounds of her panting and gasping every time he hit a tender spot deep within her, the sight of her swollen lips and dazed eyes along the feel of her nails digging in his shoulder blades drove him so close to the edge that he couldn't fight it but at the same time, he didn't want to disappoint her. His hand moved quickly between their bodies and he gave a few teasing flicks on her clit, causing Hermione to shudder and moan his name higher as her body convulsed and she could only clutch on him with legs and arms, the reason of her utter pleasure for support.

He only kept thrusting, his eyes and soul mesmerized at the beautiful sight before him, beneath him, the sight of Hermione falling off the edge because he made it and it was all he needed for himself to give a final shout of her name and climax within her in the best orgasm of his life.

After those glorious moments, he collapsed on top of her and when his mind was functioning close to normal a goofy grin spread on his face as he felt her hand caressing his head, like she had done that evening out of the tent, when his eyes had closed on their own accord in comfort and alleviation of her presence close to him. He remembered suddenly that they didn't use a spell as to stop a conception but partly, he didn't want to scare her and partly, he wouldn't mind if something happened, yes, it was early, very early, but if he wanted to be honest with himself, he could be starting a family with Hermione the very next day.

'Your gift was lovely,' he heard her saying and he looked up at her flushed face at the moment she looked down at him as his head was resting on her left breast. 'Even if I know I should be mad for have you intruding my room and checking out my nightstand.' Hermione added and Harry glanced at the very furniture she was talking about, he smiled slightly in response.

'I just needed somehow to convince you and Ron told me to search here, he said that only then I would understand, and he was right, for a few days, I got scared, I realized how you felt, why you were so scared and for some days, I thought of giving you what you wanted, but I couldn't do it, Hermione. I just couldn't live without you, so I decided to make you see, I knew you could get mad for the pensive but it was the only way to "force" you to see that I know everything and I want to be with you no matter what. I'm sorry for not seeing the signs earlier.

'Even your wand was working as my own, our bodies were acting as one before each other, but I hadn't noticed or chosen not to, chosen to ignore all the charged moments. But I didn't ignore that drunken night of the Ball, I saw the light.' Harry whispered and he was even mesmerized at how easily he felt the words flowing from his mouth as he confessed. Hermione's hand hadn't stopped caressing his head but she looked up at the ceiling as it was time her turn to speak now.

'Sometimes, it feels like I was in love with you forever, but that's not truth. It's not like the case with Ginny. I loved you as my brother at the first years of Hogwarts, I cared deeply about you because I couldn't think sexually back then due to our young age. But when I started realizing that maybe, I was sacrificing too much for a friend, I chosen to shut my eyes and ears and avoid the whole thing at all costs. I focused on Ron and tried to persuade everyone, myself and him included, that all these differences and insecurities and misunderstandings were signs of some sexual tension. I chose to focus there, especially when I saw girls like Cho and Ginny being the ones you wanted.

'Sometimes, I feel pathetic, it had been years, ever since that night when Ron left and screamed the truth in my face, he was right, I had chosen you, over a lot of people, a long time ago and I had no idea. I had chosen not to be seeing the signs either, I had chosen to play dumb and I did a pretty good job until the moment Ron screamed at me that it was you and none else from the beginning and it would be like that to the end.

'And then I knew, I had been in love with you for months if not years before that, it wasn't like an obsession over who you are, it mostly feels like a constant, dull –by now- pain in my heart, something like Muggle cancer in a final state. I'm not able to get cured, I'm only able to postpone my death…

'I hadn't needed the cup to show me how I felt, it only showed me my fears, like the locket did with Ron, he knew we would see each other one day, he just thought I'd choose you for the wrong reasons. The cup in my case only scratched the wound of my soul, a wound infected by my stubbornness, the war, my fears for you and the extra burden I'd given you if I had you aware of my feelings, Ginny's presence in your life, Ron's presence in both our lives and your actions. All these things never allowed my wound to heal, it got cleaned as the years passed but it never got cured.' Hermione finished her words with a sigh as she was still staring at the ceiling, Harry felt the sadness wash over himself as he knew she had been through a lot, he moved slowly, slipping out of her warmth and coming face to face as she still stared upwards until her eyes could have focus of his own.

'Let me cure you, let me do it with you, and please… help me get cured because even after four years, there are still the nightmares and the constant fear of losing you, of something happening to you, of listening to your torture's screams in my sleep. Lets do it together, we tried all the tricks in the old book to screw up and I just want us to be together, to love each other, we've done a good start, let's not spoil it.

'I guess our love was always like the wind, we couldn't see it, but we could feel it, but now we can and it's a refreshing kind of wind isn't it?' Harry whispered as he felt her arms wrapping around his shoulders, her eyes were ready to shed tears and they did so as she shut her eyes, he leaned down and took them away with his own lips, kissing her face tenderly.

She felt his lips on her skin, his warm breath caressing her cheeks, his lips kissing every spot the tears dampened, his words soothing her heart and soul.

'It's the best kind of wind,' she finally whispered and she saw him smiling so brightly after so long, maybe he was smiling brighter than ever before as this time his lips captured hers again and she too, smiled brightly for the first time in years as the kiss was deepened by both of them.

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YES YES YES YES YES *fireworks* *applause* THEY MADE IT, THEY'RE TOGETHER YAAY i even got frustrated with these two but they're together *happy dance*

soo? what u think guys? harry made a beautiful birthday gift didn't he? what u think of the roses and the multipnesive? i guessed such things could be created as Slughorn had tried to modify his original memory with young Riddle so why not make one pensive with a lot of memories in a sequence right? Harry put in some of their best moments and since Hermione needed facts, he gave them to her...and they talked to each other, loved each other and what u think of Hermione finally confessing her love and Harry's last suggestion?

please review, we have an epilogue and as you all know, the deal is on, reviews=updates,

please tell me what you think of this huge full of hhr chapter

in the epilogue of this i have some good announcements to make so you will know soon :)

thanks for reading

CP09


	13. Epilogue

Yeeey the final chapter! the epilogue of the story! I don't have a lot of things to say here at the beginning so just scroll down and read the final piece, oh and just one thing: your love, your reviews, your care, make me a better author, a better person and gives me motivation even in my darkest days... and for that, i will always be grateful!

Enjoy...

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Epilogue

11th of December 2017

'Come on, just one, final push and we're done!' Hermione called out as she held her wand with one hand and the other helped the baby come out. Lavender Weasley screamed in pain once again and cursed loudly as she pushed down.

'There we go!' Hermione called out as the baby cry filled the place the moment the first sunrise illuminated the hospital room. Hermione smiled, cast a couple of spells on Lavender and then wrapped the baby quickly in a blanket.

'Tell me it's a girl finally!' Lavender called out exhausted. Hermione didn't speak but gave the baby to its mother who took it and opened the blanket in a motion. When she saw the baby's sex she threw her body against the pillows and groaned.

'I'm going to kill him!' she screamed in desperation as the rest of the healers took the baby and kept up with strengthening potions and spells. 'Tell him to forget our bloody bed until Easter!' Lavender commanded her old classmate and Hermione just rolled her eyes and moved close to the doors of the room, stopping a yawn as she had been summoned in the middle of the night and just now, in 7 am, Lavender had given birth to her fifth child. She opened the doors and was greeted by a bunch of people; the Weasleys, Luna and Parvati were there, all looking expectantly with Hermione's best friend, Ron right before her looking fearful.

'Congratulations,' Hermione started. 'You have a healthy baby boy, Ron.' She added and before she could move closer and hug her friend for the happy news of the healthy baby she saw him groaning in actual remorse.

'She's going to divorce me this time for sure! Bloody Hell!' Ron exclaimed and Hermione took out her wand in an instant and pointed it at Ron whose tongue grew half a meter in another instant, he bit on it and groaned as he looked furious at his best friend for twenty six years.

'No swearing in my wing unless it comes from someone who tries to take a child out of her, Ronald Weasley. It's a blessing you have five sons and other people would kill for your fortune, now, I will reverse the spell and you will go in there on your knees and beg for her mercy because she is seriously upset for this not being the time your daughter arrived…' Hermione said sternly as the rest patted his back or chuckled at his huge tongue that was actually moving out of his mouth. Hermione finished the spell and Ron didn't even have the time to retort something smart at Hermione as Lavender's commanding voice from the inside of the delivery room had him rushing inside with fear on his face.

Molly, Arthur, Lavender's mother and the rest of the Weasleys patted Hermione's shoulders and thanked her for getting to the hospital in the middle of the night for the delivery. Hermione waved it off gently, saying it's her duty but this time she didn't stop the yawn as she was up from last night and had been waiting for Lavender to get to labor's final stage for hours. She approached Fleur who was holding one of the most precious people in Hermione's life. Hermione smiled at the French woman who gave her youngest daughter back to her mother.

'Mummy,' the little girl muttered and Hermione nodded and kissed her forehead as the seven year old Jane Potter opened her eyes a bit and looked at Hermione. 'Aunt Lav has a girl?' Jane asked and Hermione shook her head.

'Not this time, pumpkin,' Hermione replied softly as Fleur and Ginny chuckled the moment the girl groaned.

'Oh she's gonna keep complaining then!' the girl said sleepily and exasperated, causing everyone to laugh and nod their heads. Hermione kissed her daughter again and rocked her in her arms as the girl's head was resting in the crook of Hermione's neck.

'Any news from Harry?' Molly asked and Hermione shrugged soberly.

'Not yet, but I hope I'll have news of his soon, I hope he'll be back by Arthur's birthday…' Hermione said and looked at the fourth son of Ron's who smiled at his Godmother and nodded his head. Harry was away for a mission with the Aurors of the British ministry and since he was the Head Auror he had to always be the first to go and the last to return for the sake of his team.

Molly patted Hermione's shoulder and kissed the side of her head like she would do when Hermione was a young student.

'Do not worry, my dear, I'm sure he'll be back very soon.' Molly said and Hermione nodded and focused back on her youngest child that had been brought here with Fleur's help who was the one to summon Hermione after Lavender's waters broke.

'I'll make the report later today, we should be going, say bye to everyone, pumpkin.' Hermione whispered close to her daughter's brown locks and the girl opened once again her emerald green eyes and looked at everyone tiredly.

'Bye everyone,' she said as she waved her hand before she could clutch at her mother's blouse once again like she used to do when she was younger. She was obviously too tired to say her goodbyes to everyone around her one by one so a general goodbye was enough for now. Hermione smiled at the rest and started moving down the corridor, she was exhausted and it was the start of a Thursday that meant a lot of traumas and wounds but apart the emergency with the labor, her watch wasn't starting up until the afternoon so she was going to return home, sleep as much as possible and then take Jane to her parents' house before she could return to the hospital.

'Mommy?' Jane asked as Hermione reached the closest floo and looked at her little girl.

'Yes, sweetheart?' Hermione asked as she took the powder in her hand and held her child firmer in her arms.

'You really think daddy will return soon?' Jane asked and Hermione smiled and kissed her baby girl's nose.

'I'm positive, I'm sure he'll be back before we know it.' Hermione said with a smile and Jane smiled this time and nodded as she held her mother tightly while they flood back home.

Grimmauld Place had proven itself the best place for them, after a five-months renovation that had taken place. Hermione moved out of the floo of the Potter Manor as not the place was called by the _Prophet_ and the people in the ministry and Hermione's eyes fell on a big painting of Luna's above the fireplace, Hermione's family.

Herself, Harry, Jane in Hermione's lap at the age of three, her brother James, at age of seven, Hermione and Harry's eldest, Lily Hermione at age of nine and Teddy Lupin, Harry's Godson and Hermione's second son as she seen him as her own, were her family.

Harry and Hermione had gotten married just a few months after the start of their relationship, the marriage was still called the "Union of the Age" as the Hero of the community and his best friend and one of the most promising Healers in the community had gotten married after years of friendship and love.

Hermione had found out about her pregnancy soon after but before they could welcome their daughter into the world, they first welcomed a son. Andromeda Tonks had been worn out from the war and after a bad cold her already tired body couldn't put up a fight and soon she was losing her life by the "fallens' flu" a decease new to the community that usually hit the families of war fighters, the ones who fought with the dark side and suffered by spells still unknown and unbroken to many…

Teddy at age of five became instantly a part of Harry and Hermione as the orphan boy had only his Godfather left and of course Harry wouldn't leave the boy alone, he adored his little Godson. Hermione was there too, to open her arms for the young boy that meant so much to her too as Lupin and Tonks had been her friends and co-fighters.

Teddy had decided to be the guardian of the Potter kids and many times, he was referred as the "eldest Potter", he was a Lupin, like his father but even if the Potters had taken his custody they hadn't adopted him so he could keep his father's name, nevertheless, the boy always saw Harry and Hermione with the love he would have seen his parents.

Teddy and Lily had became best friends literally from the crib as Teddy had spent a lot of nights entertaining Lily by changing his hair color for her to be interested in something than her attempts to drive her parents nuts with her crying. When James arrived, just two years later, in 2006, Teddy had found a male best friend as well and the team had been complete with the addition of little Jane in 2010 who was the "baby" of the family, always protected by the boys and taken care of by her sister. Now with Teddy at twenty one and in the Healer program with his internship being in Hogwarts, just like Hermione's had been, and Lily and James in Hogwarts too, in their third and first year respectively, Jane had been left alone in the house but Hermione and Harry did their best for their youngest child to have as much fun as possible even without the rest of the gang.

'Mommy can I sleep with you? Since daddy is not here?' Jane asked innocently as Hermione kept carrying her daughter in her arms while she started climbing the stairs. She chuckled and looked at her bushy haired little version.

'Aren't you supposed to be a grown girl?' she asked, slightly out of breath as she finally reached the second floor, where her and Harry's bedroom were, she started towards that direction.

'I am, of course I am! But, since daddy's not here and I was a good a girl, can I sleep in your hug?' Jane asked, _even_ more innocently and Hermione would love to tease more her baby girl but all the exhaustion of the night caught up with her and she finally bowed her body and set her daughter on her feet at the bedroom's doorstep.

'Climb on the bed, I'm going to take off of me the sterilization serum with a shower so we can sleep.' Hermione finally said as she straightened her body again and stretched the best she could with a small groan of exhaustion, she was only thirty eight but sometimes, a war, four kids and the job of the healer were taking their toll on her.

She moved inside the bathroom and stripped quickly, needing the hot water on her poor muscles as she felt heavier by the moment. She put her hair up in a bun as not to get it wet and got under the hot shower. She closed her eyes in alleviation and without looking, she gripped the first bottle of shower potion for relaxation, she spread some of it on her sponge and started running it up and down her skin, moaning quietly as the magical product started working instantly on her tired body.

And as her eyes closed while the water ran down her body, she thought of her husband's warm lips and where they would plant kisses on her shoulder, where the sponge was now rubbing gently. She missed Harry greatly, he had been away for the past three weeks and only her crazy hours at the hospital and Jane had kept her mind off the disturbing fact of the lack of news from him for over a week now.

He always contacted with her, almost daily, with an owl, with a small floo call from the headquarters, somehow. The last time she had news of him was eight days ago, last Wednesday, and only then she allowed the fear and the worry to wrap around her heart and surge through her veins. They say bad news are always first to be known but where was he? She knew the mission in Portugal was going to be difficult but she hoped for him to be back sooner than that and now she had no news of him.

With a sigh that seemed as if coming from her very soul, she turned off the water and gripped a towel to dry her body. She wrapped it around herself and moved out of the bathroom that was joined with the master bedroom; she smiled as she looked at the bed.

Jane had fallen asleep on her dad's side, clutching at the pillow Harry used just like Hermione always did in her sleep the times Harry was away like now, the little girl's face was peaceful and almost a small smile was formed on her lips as her little perky nose was buried in the pillow with her dad's smell.

Hermione put on her gown and a pair of underwear and got close to the bed and under the covers like her daughter had done first. She laid on her side, facing her sleeping baby girl and Hermione's hand touched little Jane's cheek in a feather-like caress. When the emerald eyes were covered by her little eyelids, she was exactly like Hermione in a younger, pre-Hogwarts time. Hermione smiled slightly as she snuggled closer to her baby and put her arm around the girl's shoulder the moment the little child moved closer in her sleep too.

Soon, mother and daughter where in the middle of the bed, laid on their sides and in a hug, little Jane's head under Hermione's chin, both of them inhaling each other's familiar scent and Harry's pillow, both gaining strength until their favorite person could be back home.

'Mommy, I miss daddy,' Jane said the moment Hermione was about to dose off, she opened her eyes again and kissed the top of Jane's head.

'I miss him too, sweetheart.' Hermione said quietly and looked down at her baby girl. 'But I trust him, and I know he will come back soon.' Hermione added as she felt her child's first tear. 'Don't cry, honey, daddy wouldn't want you to be sad.' Hermione added as she caressed the rest of the tears with her hand. Jane nodded and sniffed before she could smile bravely at her mom.

Harry Potter flood back in his house with a big sigh and a frown. His body hurt all over and he could feel his head spinning. He looked around him and he was surprised to be greeted by silence, usually the very hyper and over joyous daughter of his would greet him with a big hug and a kiss but now only silence greeted him.

'Hermione? Jane?' he called out like he usually did but there was no answer, usually he would smile internally at calling these two names was like calling Hermione with her full name but right now his mind was racing.

He went to overdrive, it was ten in the morning, Jane and Hermione should be home since he knew Hermione's schedule, had something happened while he was away with no means of communication? His trained as-auror brain thought about all the possible scenarios. His body moved on its own accord and broke to a sprint as he moved up the stairs, the silence there too, made his stomach clutch. He rushed close to his bedroom, withdrawing his wand in the meanwhile but he froze when he looked inside.

One of the most beautiful sights came in his view. Hermione was on her back, her body relaxed as she lay peacefully there, Jane was on her mom's side, arm and leg draped over Hermione's chest and legs respectively as her little head was resting on Hermione's side. Both girls breathed in and out in unison in their slumber.

Harry smiled and exhaled soundlessly in relief as he took his wand back in its holster and approached two of the three girls of his life. He was still in his uniform, he desperately needed a shower and some kind of meal, _any_ kind of meal, but first of all, he wanted to greet her back, wanted to kiss her sweetly on the lips and wake her up slowly as his hand would run in her curls, he wanted to see Hermione's eyes opening slowly and that familiar smile back on her face.

'DADDY!' Jane's scream of joy made Harry actually gasp as his eyes were trained on Hermione while his thoughts had been focused on her. Hermione's eyes opened widely both at the scream of her child's and her frantic standing up, almost stepping on her mother as to throwing herself in her dad's hug.

'Princess,' Harry called out as he hugged his child and kissed her cheek many times, all the while smiling at Hermione who was seating up on the bed that he sat on. 'Why you're sleeping? It's almost midday.' Harry questioned as he put Jane on his lap and hugged his wife with one arm before their lips could meet in a long needed kiss with Hermione wrapping her arms around her husband the best she could.

'Welcome back,' she whispered in his ear and felt his own lips kissing her earlobe in response.

'Daddy, we had to go to the hospital, that's why we were sleeping until now,' Jane said and Harry looked alarmed at Hermione who just smiled.

'Lav gave birth…' she said and Harry was ready to ask but she caught him. 'To another boy…' she added and Harry groaned playfully.

'Poor Ron… he will never feel the joy of getting to be the dad of a princess as this…' Harry said playfully as he nuzzled his nose on Jane's neck who squealed and laughed with her legs and arms trying to stop him.

'Sweetheart, why don't you go and owl your brother and sister of daddy's arrival, they will be delighted and you can show them how much better you got at spelling and grammar through the letter…' Hermione offered cleverly for Jane to give them just a bit of space and time but Jane Potter wasn't a fool.

'But daddy just arrived and I missed him…' Jane pouted and Harry this time decided to try, he adored his youngest hell raiser but he really wanted to wrap his arms around his wife and kiss her lips properly.

'When mommy will go at the hospital you'll have me all to yourself, we have three weeks to catch up and I'm sure you've learnt so many new things, so go and owl Lily and Jamie, they deserve to know I'm back so they can be calmed and tell them to inform Teddy too… When mommy will be at the hospital, you and I will make our favorite pumpkin pie for dessert tonight… daddy's back and we're going to celebrate!' Harry exclaimed over excitedly for his little girl to buy it this time and Jane did so as dessert and hours with daddy were the catch. She kissed Harry on the cheek a few more times, smiled at her mom and ran out of the room, Hermione with a wave of her chin closed the door behind her daughter and almost squealed as Harry took her with his own body down on the mattress, his lips claiming hers instantly.

'I missed you so much,' he whispered the moment he broke the kiss and nipped on her neck until he reached the crook of it and nuzzled his nose there, making his wife shiver and moan in pleasure.

'Hmmm, oh Harry, I missed you too…' Hermione said breathlessly as she felt his teeth grazing her skin as his hands caressed her sides and her fuller breasts. 'Don't you dare leave a mark, I can't wear a scarf in the hospital…' Hermione added sternly and heard her husband and friend of so many years chuckling.

'I will bite you…'

'No you won't…'

'I will…'

'No you wo-OUH!' she cried out as the shiver ran down her spine, coaxed by what he had just done. 'Did you just bite me?' she asked in disbelief. Harry moved his face away from her neck as to look at her, his emerald green eyes full of mirth and joy for being back with his family back with her, she knew.

'Yes… yes I did, what you're gonna do about that?' he provoked and Hermione grinned and turned the game in her favor by pushing him and straddling his lap. She attacked and soon he was the one groaning and moaning as the thin fabric of her gown allowed all the heat and the soft texture of hers to rub against his body even if his uniform was more of a burrier.

'I really missed you…' Hermione whispered close to her husband's ear as she caressed his hair with one hand and his neck with the other, moving it down across his body to his belt. Harry gasped and took her face in both hands as to kiss her. They had missed each other, the proximity, the tension, the safety and the care.

Harry wrapped his hands around her waist and was ready to take off her gown by its hem but the footsteps of their daughter were returning so Hermione had only the time to slap her husband's hands away and jump off him, stand up awkwardly and wait for the door to burst open like it always did when Jane was to get inside the bedroom. Harry had only the time to sat up, grip a pillow and place it on his lap as to hide certain things while he blushed deeply, both he and Hermione were out of breath but Jane didn't seem to notice as she was out of breath too.

'I was making the letter for Lily and Jamie but Teddy flood and told me to tell you to go there, something happened with Lily and James…' Jane exclaimed and both Harry and Hermione tensed up and frowned upon the news, all the tension and lust forgotten as they were both taken into the parent mode in an instant.

Hermione rushed close to her wardrobe while Harry took his wand and cast a couple of cleaning charms on himself, the shower he hoped for in the company of his wife would have to wait. Jane watched as her parents got ready within seconds and Harry approached and took her hand.

'You'll come with us, but you won't leave mommy's or my sight ok?' Harry asked as he knelt before his child and Jane nodded frantically as just few underage children had the opportunity to visit Hogwarts.

The three Potters were leaving their house via apparition within the next moments, Jane being side-along apparated by her mom right out of the Hogwarts grounds. They got inside and started moving towards the castle. Hermione in new black robes while Harry was still in his uniform, Jane was still in the jean and Gryffindor blouse of her sister's that Fleur had changed her quickly into when Hermione had been summoned to go the hospital. Soon the trio was getting inside the Entrance Hall, there was silence for now as there were classes in process as it seemed.

'Teddy said we should go to the hospital wing,' Jane said and her parents took the well known root for the infirmary with their daughter between them.

Sometimes, Lily was way too much like her father; Hermione had once said and now was confirmed. Perfect in classes, good at Quidditch and the one with the greatest burden on her shoulders as she was the "Eldest Potter child", Lily sometimes struggled with all the fame and recognition of her family's. The genes of wanting to break rules and being hot tempered like Harry didn't help, especially when she joined forces with her brother, James and his best friends, Xenophilious and Fred Weasley…

The Potters opened the heavy doors of the infirmary to find a few people inside waiting for them, once again, like they did every time something happened since Neville, Hogwarts' youngest and most promising Headmaster, wanted his old friends knowing of what was happening with their kids as to avoid the extra fame from the _Prophet_.

Inside the room, Neville was talking with the very old by now professor Flitwuick as Teddy Lupin was healing some bruises from Lily Potter's cheek while James was sat next to her, seemingly fine, Lily's hand was also in a bandage. The moment the two Potters saw their parents, they stood up and rushed close to their father who had been away in a mission for the past weeks.

Harry hugged his children lovingly and patted his Godson's back tenderly. Each of his children, Teddy included, were so much different, Lily was the female version of him inside, even if she looked exactly like her mother, she was a female Harry in character, a fact that many times led her to situations as this. James was like Harry externally as he looked exactly like his father but in character, he was a combination of Harry and Ron, maybe because he was raised in the Weasley environment and George Weasley made sure all his nephews and nieces would be the Hell raisers that would continue what he and Fred had started once. Jane on the other hand had turned out to be like Hermione, a lot like Hermione, more careful, more thoughtful with a brain that scared even adults; she and Teddy looked a lot like each other, maybe Jane having taken from Hermione and Teddy being Remus' son but having Hermione a matriarch figure in his life…

'What happened?' Hermione asked sternly, looking at Neville and not her eldest children or her Godson as she knew they would try to escape this by giving attention on Harry's return.

'Well, professor Flitwuick stopped Lil at first and then the boys' trio in the fourth floor's corridor, fighting with a few other children, their wands were forgotten after a point…. At first I thought of not calling you but Lil here probably got hit by some spell that was activated a few hours later and made her left side get paralyzed… the spell was advanced from a seventh year old Slytherin…' Neville said as lightly as he could at Hermione, his old friend, referring to Lily with her nickname as Neville was a family friend.

Hermione's eyes widened, usually, her daughter didn't get into physical or magical fights, maybe a disarming charm as to defend herself would be tops, Hermione had been used to be summoned at Hogwarts only for times of Lily having opened yet another secret opening to Hogsmeade but never because she attacked other children.

Harry had listened to Neville and his hand was still on Lily's shoulder whose head now was bowed as to avoid her mother's gaze. Harry glanced at Hermione who took a deep calming breath, they obviously both had a long day and it was only late in the morning.

'Can you please give us a moment?' Hermione required and both the professors nodded their heads and exited the room, Neville trying to explain that nothing big happened and that they were children, telling the Potter they would talk when this was over here, within the infirmary's doors. 'Teddy, you and Jane too, please,' Hermione addressed the boy she saw as her eldest son, the boy she had explained for the first time what falling in love feels like.

'Take it is on her, she just lost it,' Teddy murmured to Hermione, always trying to defend the young Potters.

'Take Jane for a late breakfast please, she's been out of her bed all night.' Hermione only said as Harry, James and Lily waited for Jane and Teddy to leave the room as well.

'Hermione…' Harry warned as she turned around and looked at her children the moment the door was shut behind them.

'I will ask once, and I want a straight answer, why In Merlin's name, you fought with other children when we have talked so many times over this? What did they tell you?' Hermione asked and both Lily and James Potter remained silent with bowed heads right in front of their father. Hermione was a loving mother but when things were getting wrong, she was taking her children's wrong doings as her failures, she was a loving but when needed, stern mom as to keep her house on its feet, sometimes Harry thought Mrs. Weasley was giving mothering lessons to the ladies of the extended family…

'I…' James started and glanced at his mother's angry gaze before he could look at his sister who was unmoving. 'I got there with Xeno' and Fred when it had started already, I heard these students insulting Lil and I just stormed in the fight… I don't know what exactly happened.' James finally confessed and since Lily didn't retort anything James was saying the truth and wasn't just trying to avoid punishment as every eleven year old would do.

'So, instead of stopping your sister from hurting herself, you decided to fight when you're still learning the basics…' Hermione half-asked, half-confirmed her son's words and the young boy nodded his head. Hermione sighed exasperated and pinched the bridge of her nose in tiredness.

'Love… let me try…' Harry offered as he watched his exhausted wife. They were both on the edge, from not seeing each for so long, for not having vent for all these days away from each other with their jobs driving them nuts, Harry could only imagine how many hours Hermione had been at the hospital for Lavender to give birth and now Hermione did her best not to vent all this tiredness on the wrong people.

As if she was reading his mind, Hermione nodded her head, gestured for James to follow her out of the room, as she passed by her husband and daughter, the couple locked eyes and just communicated with each for a single moment before Hermione could take her son by the shoulder outside.

When the door was closed Harry moved just a couple of steps away and sat on one of the beds with a groan of exhaustion while Lily remained with her head bowed where she had been standing.

'Won't you talk to your "dada" about what happened?' Harry asked gently as he offered his hand, his skin wounded and badly healed in the previous weeks. Since Lily didn't seem willing to move, Harry took her by her good hand and brought her before him, she was still standing in her Gryffindor uniform, silent.

'Did someone insult you?' Harry asked, even if he doubted it, Lily, like Hermione at her age, was a mature child that wouldn't give attention in something like that. Lily indeed, shook her head.

'Was it about some…boy?' Harry asked with difficulty this time, he hated to ask something like that, his child was an innocent little flower, and none would ever be good enough for her. Lily shook her head again and Harry had to admit, he felt relieved.

'They called mom "Mudblood",' Lily finally said and she looked up only to greet her dad with watery, chocolate brown eyes. 'I know I shouldn't pay attention, both you and mom told me not to, and you're right, but…Teddy's dad and mom are dead because of the war and mommy was in the war and you were in the war… everyone was in the war… we still go to the graveyard for Grandma and Grandpa and there are people out there who think blood status matters… they still think it's important… and you were away for so long and we had no news of you and I was worried.

'And that girl started saying things about you and mom and then she—called mom like that and I lost it, because you're still at missions fighting for everyone and there are people insulting you and mom… and…' Lily had said all that had happened in a breath but she finally burst into tears and fell in her father's arms as Harry wrapped her in a hug and allowed her to cry.

'Sweetie…' Harry said softly a few moments later. 'Listen to me…' he added as he framed her face with his hand and stared at the eyes he loved so much, Hermione's eyes. 'I understand it was a moment of lack of control, but believe me, mommy is more upset when she knows you did something wrong than when other people said something wrong… because you're her daughter, her beautiful child that she cares so much about. People don't change, and we can't do a lot of things about that. We can only get better for ourselves.' Harry tried to explain as Lily sat on one of his legs and leaned her head on his chest like she would do when she was a little girl who wanted to sleep in her dad's arms.

'I know you got mad because your mom was insulted, I had done the same because of the same reason and the result wasn't nice for me,' Harry added as he remembered that match with Slytherin in his sixth year, when he had fought with Malfoy.

'Your mom and I had the fights we needed to have, we bear our scars and we take care of them but you don't need to do the same for us, it's not your job to do something like that. You only have to be proud of your mom to be a Muggle-Born, like I am for my own mother, but you're getting nowhere by fighting people who want just that…' Harry said softly and Lily nodded her head again as she sighed. 'Is your hand in pain?' he added as he knew the conversation was over and the message sent across. Lily shook her head and looked up at him.

'Not so much…' Lily said and Harry took it gently and kissed the bandage softly. 'Now it's even better,' Lily said with a small smile that turned into a grin as Harry smiled back playfully. 'Will you talk to mommy?' she asked worried and Harry sighed but nodded.

'Yes… this time I will, but only because you lost control and I know how it feels to just get mad, but I don't want you to get in any other kind of fight from now on, ok?' Harry asked and Lily nodded her head honestly, making Harry smile.

'I missed you, daddy,' Lily said and Harry grinned and kissed her cheek.

'I missed you too, sweetie,' Harry replied and helped her up before he could stand too. Father and daughter started for the doors of the infirmary, where they would reveal Hermione and James waiting for them.

Harry this time, would take care of Hermione's scolding and lectures, since Lily had been in a position he knew well, his lecture was enough "punishment". Hermione didn't need to know for now why her daughter fought with other children, Harry would tell her later, when he'd be alone with her as to save Lily's next visit in Hongsmeade in his own special way….

For now he only smiled and hugged his wife in his way out, patted Lily's back with the other hand while Hermione was still having James by his shoulder, the four Potters started for the kitchens, where Teddy had probably taken Jane for the late breakfast or the early lunch.

And even if his body hurt all over, even if his wife was still disappointed and exhausted as well as their children who looked like having spent the night in the infirmary and even if he knew the day was far from over as he would have to see Ron, listen to his moaning for the new son and then make dinner and pumpkin pie as he had promised, Harry smiled widely as this, with its ups and downs was the life he had fought for, years ago, when he was finally defying the false rules that had been set for him and Hermione. He smiled as he saw that all those comfortable feelings of love and care and need and compassion had been the base for the family he had now, for the love he had now.

He had solved a problem back then, he had destroyed the fog that prevented him from seeing clearly and now he was only happy as he moved down the corridor of his old school with his children and Hermione by his side… the woman that had been there in so many forms and shapes but as his wife, she gave and took it all, as his wife, she completed him.

END

* * *

yeey hurray! it's over, what u think guys? i know i killed Andromeda but i think, like in the Greatest Truth that Teddy would be so happy with Harry and Hermione so here he is with the rest of the family. what you think of the kids guys? and poor ron has yet another son and no girl...

and now the _**announcement**_, like in my previous 4 stories, i have considered pausing my author-hhr activity but my muse refuses and this time is not an exception. _**I am ready to start a brand new HHR story, something completely different from all the things i have done **_(and indeed, i have experimented with A LOT of things) it will be my 70th story and I can only hope for your _support _and _love_, two things that motivated me to make this story too, one of my fav and most successful and finish it in 2 months and 4 days... So if you want to start with me another journey in a few days, just alert me as an author and the notification of the first chapter will soon be in your inbox, if you've alerted me already... just wait a bit :)

Thank you so much for reading and loving this story so much, I never expected it to be one of my best, please review and let me know what you think of the epilogue, the Weasleys, the Potters and Harry solving the "she's-like-a-sister problem".

see you soon...

**_Christina Potter 09_**


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